Was spanking done out of anger in the past?

[Anonymous]

I've seen a couple movie clips where a parent (either the mother or father) spanks and it's always done within a minute after the offense, followed by yelling and a couple hard hits with either the shoes or a belt. Every single time there is a movie about a parent spanking their child, it's always done out of anger. They are always yelling, they are never calm and they never wait for some time to pass.

Basically it's not even used as last resort nor timely. It's done when you're frustrated and yelling. There was even a clip about a Fillipine father calling his daughter stupid, while yelling and spanking at the same time.

Was that the type of spanking in the past? As first resort, immediately and when your temper is out of control, in anger? In that case, wasn't that abuse?

Here is an interesting article about spanking done in anger:

https://www.minnpost.com/second-opinion/2014/04/parents-often-spank-out-anger-and-trivial-reasons-real-time-study-finds/

Updates

1 y

then the child is always left crying and scared, wanting it to stop

[Anonymous]

Yes, I think it is often an anger thing where the parent should have a little more self control.

I was never really spanked as a kid, but my ex was. I remember her describing how with her dad, he would only spank when she did something blatantly bad and it was a last resort. In that case it was out of anger, but she did not feel like it was abusive.

With her mom, however, it was like she would spank her and her siblings just because she was in a bad mood and wanted to let off some steam. It would be over the stupidest, borderline made up things, and I'm talking hard spankings with belts or even a vacuum cord. Not a few spanks either, she'd go on for like 10+ minutes and bare butt too. This continued until she was like 12, which seems way too old for that treatment.

I'd say that kind of spanking is definitely abusive. Maybe it's a cultural thing because they're Asian, but that seems like just another excuse for abuse.

[Asker]

It's definitely abusive. If they're going to spank and are angry at that moment, they should at least wait 15 minutes. I'm sorry to hear your ex underwent that treatment. That was indeed abuse, regardless of the reason for the spanking. I believe anytime anyone hits a child in anger (even if it was for serious offense), it's abusive.

[Opinion Owner]

I agree I think parents need to realize they can really traumatize their kids with spankings and beatings.

[MemeSupreme]

yeah a lot of the time

[Asker]

Indeed. It was never about teaching but only letting off some steam, getting rid of their frustration. Bad parenting.

[BarryLiverstone]

Not abusive

[Asker]

But it's done out of anger when the parents are frustrated. Plus they are yelling by then. Hitting the kid when you're upset sounds abusive to me.

[Asker]

Yelling, calling the child stupid while spanking at the same time sounds abusive.

[BarryLiverstone]

Sure all that is over the top. But spanking is a good form of discipline

[Asker]

If it's inconsistent or done in anger or all the times for everything then it can bad.

[BarryLiverstone]

Obv that’s true. Spankings should be rare and done to get the attention of the troublemaker. Done too often they lose all value as discipline