Family & Friends

Would you put your loved one in a nursing home?

My mom is confined to a wheelchair. She cannot stand much less walk. I have to lift under her and transfer her to where she needs to go. My mother cannot even use the commode. She wears pull ups, but she will not go in them. She has my daughter or I to set her up on the edge of the bed, pick her up and place her on the bedside potty. This happens at least twice a day. My mom is 5'11 and about 180 lbs. We've been doing this the past 6 months.

I am almost 50 myself and have suffer from chronic back pain. After all the heavy lifting under my mom I have this sharp pain radiating down my right side into my leg about twice a day and it hurts. I explain to my mom that I hurt, and in pain but she does not care. My mom fears going into a nursing home, but we cannot take care of her, my mom needs 24-hour care. My mother wakes up in pain every morning and cries. My mother wakes us up int he early morning hours at 2 and 3 am to be turned in bed. It is a nightmare!

I moved in with my mom a year and a half ago. She told me if she goes into a home she sees to it that I will end up homeless again. No one here at her home can give her the care she needs which is 24-hour care. My mother cannot bath herself, use the toilet, walk, position herself in bed, plus she is a fall risk, and she see nothing wrong with us carrying this burden. God knows I need a place to stay, and I was going above and beyond taking care of her in fear of being homeless again, but this is not fair. My mother got pissed because I told my daughter she needs to be in a nursing home. My daughter wants my mom's house. My mom promised to leave the house tp my daughter if she would take care of her. My daughter works and goes to school. I do a majority of the caring since my daughter is always working or hanging out, she is only 20. She does help with my mom's care, but I do most of the work. Am I being unreasonable?

Would you put your loved one in a nursing home?
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