Why are men the disciplinarian of the household and partnership?

[Anonymous]

Fathers are most often the partner who disciplines their kids when they misbehave. I was wondering why kids listen to their fathers more than mothers when it comes to discipline. I see this in a lot of families where the mom will ask the child to do something and the child won't listen but they are more likely to listen to their father the first time. Why is the father the authority of the household? Just curious as to why its more so the father than the mother. Women, if you have kids, does this frustrate you?

[Orion84]

That doesn't always have to be the case, but it generally is.

My theory, and experiencing it for myself, is that mother's have a more nurturing attitude toward their kids, than fathers do. That's not to say that both parents don't love and protect their kids; they absolutely do.

However, women carry the child for nine months, they nurture the child. There's a special kind of bond there, which men can't replicate. Women have a natural soft spot, for their kids, and kids know this.

That's why kids usually ask their mother, in the event they want something, because mom will most likely say yes. Women want their kids to be happy. Thst's also why kids run to their mothers when they're hurt. They know mom will make it better.

Fathers, of course, also want their kids to be happy, but more importantly, our natural instinct is to keep our children alive. That used to mean teaching them literal survival skills, but in more modern times tends to be more of a "no nonsense" approach to parenting.

We still love our kids, and can have fun with them, but we also have a more innate sense of when fun stops, being tough begins. Sometimes being gentle will get someone killed, so we have to be more commanding, to show that what we're saying is important. Kids can sense that.

There's just this attitude of "Mommy loves me," vs "Oh shit, dad voice. Shit's about to get real." Back in prehistoric days, children would go on hunts with their fathers, and in a dangerous situation, disobedience would get someone killed. So, when dad spoke, you listened.

We obviously don't hunt like that, anymore, but I think the instinct is still present, all these years later. Mom certainly can be the disciplinarian, but I think it just comes more naturally to fathers, and children just naturally respond that way to dads.

[Anonymous]

First off, not always. But yes, disproportionately this is a man's role. But it's for the same reason disproportionately, historically women are the nurturers. Because each generation has thier strengths and weaknesses.

[Opinion Owner]

Gender* not generation.

[LazerBean]

I think it's because ideally, on the line between fun and not fun, mother's tend to exist more in the middle and fathers tend to do better on the extremes. While fathers may be more of the harsher disciplinarian, they are oftentimes also seen as the fun, adventurous parent. I think that setup is becoming less and less prevalent, but I think it is still the ideal.

[Nikki1989]

The perception of men as the disciplinarians of the household and partnership is deeply rooted in traditional gender roles and historical contexts rather than any innate ability. They get it all wrong, more often than not.

[Anonymous]

Women are often pushovers.

[Opinion Owner]

My mom would "ground" us by sending us to our room to watch tv/play video games.