Why do my aunt and uncle seem so eager to push me out of the house?

[Anonymous]

I’ve spend a whole week at my best friends house since I had nothing to do at all. She had a week off and they invited me to come over since I have nothing to do. They got me last Saturday event and I’ve been here since. I mean don’t get me wrong I love being over there but I’m setting drained and exhausted. When I told my aunt and uncle it looks I’m going to be staying for a week at their house. They were like quickly “Have fun!” or “Good get out of here! You sit in the house way too much! I honestly don’t mine you staying over ever weekend.”
I think they’re trying to get ride of me.

I don’t work, or go to school right now and they’ve been bugging me to get a job. I stopped going to college because I was burnout. I’m not working and hasn’t worked in months. My uncle got one for not looking for a job and scolded at me and threw the job ads at my face and told me to start looking.
I know my friend had program, her mom said, “You can still say here. You don’t work and you don’t go to school. Why don’t you just say here? Maybe you can meet one of my clients and help out.”

She works as a respite provider for other clients. Why don’t they understand that I wanna go home? It’s Sunday. I am exhausted.
Why do people always nag at people that don’t work? We’re both autistic.

I am 25.

Why are my aunt and uncle trying so hard to get ride of me.

[HollyK21]

One thing I’ve learned dealing with autistic people (I’ve known a few throughout my life), is that there can be a double empathy problem at any point in time. Double empathy basically means that each party struggles to understand each others distinct communication styles. I don't know when you were officially diagnosed as autistic, or how much time you’ve spent around your aunt and uncle since then, but it sounds like they just don’t know if what they’re going to say is the right thing.


For someone who isn’t on the spectrum, reading this post it comes across pretty clear that they were joking. However, you are taking it quite literally based off how you are interpreting the words being used. On top of that, you’re dealing with your own feelings over being jobless, not in school, and probably feel like a burden. That is something you have to deal with.


I also noticed this contradiction of yours: you want to know why your uncle and aunt are so eager to push you out, while you also said “why doesn’t anyone understand I just want to go home, I’m exhausted”. So if you wanna leave, then just leave. They were not literally giving you a hard time, but you processed it that way. Experiences like this say to me that maybe you should consider going back to treatment, if you aren’t doing it already. You are probably fine for the most part but how you process and interpret certain statements can be problematic in the future.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

That’s an incredibly entitled attitude. You can use autism as an excuse if you want to, but your inability to pick up social cues doesn’t make you any less of an entitled, petulant asshole for mooching off of them while you refuse to make your own life happen.

[Finchie40]

Because your aunt and uncle want alone time and by you not working or getting on your own 2 feet your aunt and uncle are getting frustrated with you that you aren’t doing so. They still love and care about you but they clearly had enough of you , you’re an an added expense to their income if you aren’t contributing financially, so get yourself a job and get on your own 2 feet

[Asker]

I’m drained and burnt out. Working exhausted me. My uncle was like, “So? It’s called WORK! Of course it’s going you’re going to be tired! Get your ass up and get a job! Nobody cares that you’re tired.”
I’m autistic. I like staying home and not being burnt out. I’m still at my friends house

[Master_Debator]

Not reading all of that shit you wrote... money... one less mouth to feed... extra room... not dealing with you being there They want you the fuck out.

[slatyb]

What are you contributing? Do you help with household tasks, cooking, cleaning? You aren't working or in school. Do you think they will support you forever? Do you have a plan for independent living?

[Asker]

Sometimes. I do help clean but I don’t cook. My family says I can’t cook and if I knew how to cook. I’m autistic and have people always says stupid questions to me

[Staximus]

Because rent and utilities aren't free. They are tired of your excuses. You can't just be a bum and mooch off people for your while life, you have to be a contributor. You to do something productive with yourself like go to school or work.

[Asker]

I’m autistic. I get burned out so easily.

[Staximus]

Do you think anybody actually wants to go to work?

[Asker]

Frankly no

[Drumlin2001]

Get a job and start supporting yourself. Stop relying on others

[Asker]

What do you mean. Autistic people get burned out

[Anonymous]

They want you to get a job or go to school. Not saying they’re necessarily right, but that’s why they’re doing it.

[msc545]

They are trying to get you to leave because they are tired of paying for you.

[In_Trance]

What are you even doing with your life

[Asker]

Everyone keeps asking me that. I complained to my sister that my best friend and her mom are exhausting me. They always joke around always think in giving them a hard time and yeah. She said she can’t make that choice for me. Im an adult and I can make my own choices. Nobody can make you do things anymore. She said if I want to spend weekends with my friend, do it. But don’t forget the family and others. I don’t have a lot of friends anyways and most people in my family don’t even talk to me accept for her and my brother. All we did was sit in the house most of the week. I mean we did go to the mall, movies, and swimming. Her mom said, “Why go home if you have nothing to do? You don’t work, you don’t go to school, why don’t you just stay here? You’ll do nothing but sit at home bored doing NOTHING. But it’s up to you. Plus maybe tomorrow’s we can go job hunting because you need to be doing something so I told your aunt I will help.”

[In_Trance]

That's great but none of that answers my question.
How are you planning for your future? How are you paying for today? What is your purpose?

[Asker]

I’m don’t know. I have an interview Tuesday at 10am

[Pterodon]

Maybe they’re nudists and just want privacy