Single parents: would you end a relationship your child dislikes for a reason you do not find reasonable at all?

[Siajanua2027]

[sage2021]

The important thing is that the child must feel comfortable around the person.
After all you knew your child before you had the stranger come into your life.

The child should come first!

[TonyMetal___1986]

Are you sure? 🤔

I believe you, you know why? Because if a woman picks her kids over her own husband who is the father of her kids than for sure she's going to pick her kids over strangers 😂😂

A man always comes last for a woman 😏

[sage2021]

@TonyMetal___1986

Well, I didn't get a chance to experience my son coming before my husband because he wasn't there. So my son automatically came first.

But when I was dating and if my son and the guy didn't hit it off, well, my son came first. It was the only place he had. It was his home and I wanted him to feel comfortable there.

When I was growing up I didn't like any of the men my mom was seeing. I hated coming home after school and they were there. I just went straight to my bedroom and stayed there.

[TonyMetal___1986]

Right, these are bad experiences!
What if the guy was good and treated you well and made you happy, will you just dump him because your kid doesn't want him?

I know it's a very hard choice because your kids are your kids in the end, but why does a man has to pay the price or being hurt just being good and did nothing wrong at all, like if your kid didn't like him, what can he do about it 🤷🏻‍♂️

[sage2021]

I can't believe that you make it seem as if just because the guy is nice and treated me nice that I would have to drop my child and put the guy first. What if my child treated me nice?

I don't believe that you should come first before a woman's children.

I had a caregiver once, she was white and got married earlier in her life and she had a son and got a divorce.

After her son got out of highschool and was on his own, she married a Mexican guy and they had a daughter together. When I met her, her daughter was in high school and always in trouble! 😵‍💫 She got caught shoplifting and was in trouble with the police. Gee, a Mexican stealing. Hummm🤔

[sage2021]

Anyway, she put her husband first above her son and her son stopped having a relationship with her. She was upset about it but she made the choice over her son and lost him because of it.

I explained to her what she was doing wrong and how to fix it.
She followed my advice and they put their relationship back together again.
She stayed married to the guy, but she stopped putting him first all of the time because she lost her son over it.
How bad do you think her son felt when he lost his mom because some guy married his Mom and knew that her husband came first?
To me, the husband isn't such a good person after all. Because a good man wouldn't make a mother choose between him or her son.
How would you like it if your Mom did that to you and you lost your Mom?

[TonyMetal___1986]

That's not what i meant, the guy didn't make you choose, you son told you that he doesn't want him in your life and made you choose between him and the guy that you love...

Plus why you're angry, it's just a debate 🤷🏻‍♂️

[sage2021]

I don't know who you are talking about or if you are just generalizing? 🤷🏼‍♀️
Because that never happened to me and my son.
I'm not angry but it's one of those questions where someone is going to lose. It's just a matter of who.
Why is it either or? Can't she have both and everyone gets along and is happy?

This is a generic question not meant for you personally!!

[TonyMetal___1986]

True i was speaking in general, ofc she can have both but sometimes kids cannot understand that their mother loves this guy, they just don't want him 🤷🏻‍♂️

I'm asking this, based on the question i saw here...