Are men turned off by well-groomed/dressed women?

[Anonymous]

For example, does a woman who is well-dressed with nice hair and makeup come across as overly high maintenance, fussy, snooty, etc?

[Anonymous]

No, not really. It's important to put in the effort and look at the very least that you're taking care of yourself and that you take pride in yourself. Being well groomed is a sign of self respect, whether you're a man or woman and is a sign of sexual intelligence. What is not generally considered attractive is being overtly vain; there's a fine line between self respect and vanity, which generally comes down to attitude. The point I'm driving at is that everyone should strive for self improvement in all aspects of life, and this extends to grooming as long as it does not come at the expense of everything else. On the other side of this I see a lot of young men who'd be handsome if only they'd get a decent haircut and shave, and god forbid iron their shirts once in a while. Whoever you are, whether your trying to get a date or land a job, you should take pride in your appearance, as how can you expect someone to respect you if you don't respect yourself. If you put in the effort, have confidence in yourself and treat others with kindness and respect like the upstanding member of society you are, you will find yourself far better equipped to deal with the trials and tribulations of day to day life.

[MrOracle]

Turned off? Perhaps sometimes. Intimidated? in my opinion, that's much more common.
So, you might have a working class guy, and even if he's very successful (rancher, mechanic, construction, etc.) with his own business and has plenty of money, he's probably not a suit-and-tie type of guy, and he's likely to avoid such a woman. And even mid-level office workers probably do as well. Such women have a (well-earned though obviously not universal) reputation for being high maintenance and for being career-focused, so for a lot of guys, not the greatest choice for a partner.

While there are definitely guys who want their woman to have a successful career and be a business "go-getter", for most guys, her having a career isn't nearly as much of a plus as many women believe it to be - and many men will see it as a negative, as she's not as likely to want children, and much less likely to raise them herself (choosing to put them in daycare instead), which most guys wouldn't see as ideal.

And while that might be "unenlightened", it's still how a LOT of men feel, and that's not likely to change anytime soon.

[Anonymous]

In my experience YES. They think they can't live up to your demands and that you're gonna be bitchy. I'm not though I guess I can be high maintenance in some ways but all I really demand is respect, I don't know why that is so difficult to give for some men. I set boundries and some men take it as an insult and thinks that's high maintenance and tries to pressure me to do what they want instead. At least that goes for the most insecure men, and on top of not showing any respect they think you're gonna cheat constantly. It's just tiring. For now i'm sticking to dating a genuienly good guy who is comfortable in himself enough to not act like a weirdo and who isn't threatened by a woman just because she takes good care of herself and knows what she wants.

[itsmicaelaxo]

To the contrary. If he even thinks you're high maintenance by how you dress, then do you even want a guy like that in your life? Depending on what you wear, people could think maybe you're serious or old-fashioned. Try to include dresses and skirts every now and then. Or shorts with a nice, feminine blouse. You can be femenine without wearing tight/short clothes... As long as it's you and you're comfortable in what you wear, he's gonna like you in your own skin.

[Lliam]

To me, women who are well groomed and know how to dress sexy in a classy way seem self confident. I prefer them. But too much can be too much. Someone who needs name brand clothes or who gets their hair done once a week is into consumer culture, and that's a turn off for me. The same goes for women who wear too much makeup, have weird colored hair, have big tats and facial piercings, and have bad taste in clothing.
I much prefer women who know the power of femininity - who can strut a pair of heels, a tight business skirt, a pretty dress, a push up bra and cleavage, or a bikini with confidence. That, as opposed to a tom boy or all natural look. That isn't to say that there isn't a place for hiking gear or sports wear when appropriate.

[hellionthesagereborn]

I think their is a difference between high maintenance and well groomed/dressed. I think that her attitude combined with that will determine whether or not she is high maintenance. If she has designer everything, that's going to come off as high maintenance (because she is throwing a lot of money at clothes and accessories). If she seems laid back but well dressed then I don't think that's a turn off (I actually like that. If she can dress well but not be bothered to get her hands dirty too then to me that's a good attitude, she cares just enough about how she looks and presents herself to put effort into it but if she can get her hands dirty (or not freak out if her hair or make up gets messed up) too then that says she also understand that their are more important things in life then looks and presentation). Its all about balancing it out (you don't want to be obsessed with how you look but you don't want to not care at all).

[The1Guy]

Mabie it's because she looks like a picture in a magazine or an advertisement, bill board, that you automatically ignore her just like you do with the add. You dismiss her as something fake and manipulative.

I think it's the case with men too these days, if you wear a suit, you're incisible. Not talking about character, just appearance.

It's a cultural shift that happened long ago already. Once it was disrespectful not to dress casually to social events. Now you see the top businessman weqring jeans and a sweater for his public appearance/announcement.

People just don't care for these masks anymore, want to sea the person.

[sagevalentineee]

There's nothing wrong with being a little high maintenance. I'm so glad to hear you take care of yourself. Please do. Make you hair look nice, wear pretty clothes and heels. Exercise and eat well. It's so important. You only become superficial when that's the only thing you care about, obviously you need to have substance and inner beauty. And always stay miles away from the overdone look, fake tan, badly done hair, excessively white teeth, too much bling and harsh makeup.

[Redneckpunk77]

I love a nice bald puss

[egarcia1360]

There's nothing wrong with being well-groomed and well-dressed. The only way that would be a turn-off is if it were too extreme, as in noticeably fake.

A little bit of makeup to supplement natural beauty, a nice hairstyle, and a sexy outfit are all A-okay. A caked up face, a wig, and overly flashy clothing/jewelry would be unattractive.

[calvin_ssh]

Assumptions exists where information doesn't. You have provided me a description of her dressing sense, I can't judge anything out of that and that's my real life attitude, I don't let anything affect me based on vague assumptions or no personal info on that topic.

[brilliant135]

If you ask me, you just described a woman with class. Nothing more attractive than a woman that takes care of herself.
Personally, I can't stand women that don't have makeup on, show up to work with messy hair that was not even brushed and simply trying to manage it with multiple pins.
Anyway, you do exactly what you have been doing, if a man can't handle that, it's because he's insecure and you don't want him around anyway.

[ItsTheNephilim]

No, not unless 'well-groomed/dressed' includes shit load of make-up and beauty products. If you're talking about styling your hair nicely, dressing according to what suits you, taking care of your skin and maintaining a good hygiene, I'd rather be turned on by all that.

[Oram52]

On the contrary guys usually complain women don't put effort in. Do you such women having any difficulty getting attention from men? These are the kind of women I love and date.

Only guys who know they can't match up would avoid asking her out, as obviously she'd expect same standards as return. I've never seen such women having any trouble. If that was the case then why do women put so much effort at night out?

[Kiran_Yagami]

No. A woman who takes care of herself is a turn on. What men don't like is when you overdo it. If you have enough makeup on that you look like clay face, your hair is in some totally unnatural hair weave, your nails are longer than your fingers, eye liner that makes you look like satan, and eye lashes that could poke my eyes out from across the room, then men get turned off. A woman with a little class who cares about keeping herself presentable is desirable.

[Flower7]

That was very descriptive lol. My favorite part was "eyeliner that makes you look like satan".

[soleil2666]

It isn't a turn off - but - a) too many people will be invading your privacy (especially if he is also well groomed/done up to the nines) and b) if he isn't to reduce the pressure she will generally be disapproving
Dress up for success, dress down for love

[MojoRisin69Sx]

It all depends on her personality. A gorgeous female that is spirited, humble and friendly with all people is cool as it gets, but a gorgeous female that is snobby, doesn’t acknowledge the less fortunate and only keeps a small, tight circle of like friends

[Katools]

It depends and it is all relative. If a girl seems to be too occupied with her looks, she might come across as high maintenance.

My personal pereference are sporty and adventurous women, which means that being well groomed is not going to go down well on all occassions. My ideal women would be willing to rough it in the bush etc.

[jss123]

Not at all. What's wrong with someone looking after themselves. IF they can afford it. I have been in a relationship though with someone like that who couldn't afford it but saw me as the way they could do it. She asked me out but wasn't into me at all. She was always sending me links to clothes, perfume and luxuries she liked from online shops.
In the end I discovered the truth.
We haven't spoken since I directly asked her how she felt about me.

[williael]

I have never understood women/wives who send links to luxury cars, diamond upgrades to their wedding rings, and even houses, to their hard-working man! I mean, are we princesses and he's a servant? That takes balls!!!

[Anonymous]

It depends on what you mean by "well-dressed with nice hair and makeup". That is very subjective. For my own definition of those terms, I find it very attractive and a turn on. But I also know women who believe in their own minds that they are "well-dressed with nice hair and makeup" but in my opinion they are not.

But ultimately what matters more than how she dresses is her personality and her attitude. That's where many women fall down and they don't usually realize it.

[Sensmind]

Interesting I find it a huge turn on - I would ascribe the term "High Maintenance/Fussy/Snooty" to an attitude rather than a look - Some of the nicest girls I ever met were very conscious of their look and style.

[BCA6010]

No, it is far preferable over the opposite, who tend to look like a trainwreck.

You have to take "dressing/looking nice" to an extreme to come across as superficial or high maintenance. Unfortunately too many do this anyway.

[Elliot_F]

No, the more effort you put into looking nice, the more we see it... Well keep away from using dark lipstick, unless you know for sure that darker shades of lipstick are right for you. I'd get a guys opinion on that.

[Dargil]

They come across as (somewhat) vain, selective and (somewhat) unapproachable.
It is wise for someone like this to have some sort of casual Friday; casual dress, hair tied back and minimal makeup so we know you aren't a mannequin.

[Anonymous]

Depends on what do you mean by that expression, as it could be different opinions...

Yes, she could look high maintenance, if she is used to that lifestyle.

Or she could be pretending to be high maintenance, that is more often.

And my well-dressed level definition could be different then yours.

Most low level and/ or IQ men do not know how to communicate with rich girls anyway, they have different values...