Something that looks like this?
You do, don't you?
You know what that reminds me of?
That's right. You're fancy curvy razor looks like a vacuum cleaner
Not feeling so manly anymore, are you?
That's why you should be more like me and shave with one of these!
(Warning, may too manly for women and small children)
Look at that sh*t! If that were any manlier it would have a beard, and then you would need a razor for your razor!
That looks like a piece of precision equipment! A tool designed and built with a single purpose in mind. That's what I use and it is freaking awesome. As an added bonus, mine dates back to the fifties, which means that the steel used to machine it probably came from a Sherman tank that kicked loads of Nazi ass! Can your razor say that. No, stupid, cause razors can't talk! But if it could it would just cry in a high pitched voice because it is so goddamn inferior to the old school razors that our dads and grandfathers used. Can you imagine a World War 2 GI coming back from the front lines and shaving with a Mach 3? Hell no! Next time you are shaving with your 2nd rate, overpriced, 7 bladed, piece of crap, look at yourself in the mirror and try to look manly with the flimsy piece of plastic in your hands. It doesn't work. So get up, get your ass to the nearest thrift store/consignment shop and buy yourself an old school razor. Then celebrate by eating a bunch of beef jerky and proceed to high five yourself for being so damn awesome
You're f***ing welcome.