Would it hurt your feelings if somebody called you average looking?

Question

Average looking doesn’t seem like a compliment to me but it is better than being called ugly

Average looking seems like an insult to me because you are basically telling a person they are not pretty or not handsome

Do you agree with what I wrote?

rjroy3 · Accepted Answer

That's what "basic" means essentially to the nth degree. You're saying someone is the most average typical to the stereotype possible. For a month or two on my Tinder I said outright that I was looking for basic girls. The more basic the better.

Love white claw? Swipe right. Pumpkin spice your thing? Swipe right. Forget what else I put but it did pretty well lmao. a lot of girls who resonate with being a basic bitch 😂

But being called average looking is a little more REAL so to speak and if a girl is already insecure it might hit too close to home. If a girl feels like she's not among the hottest girls, but knows she isn't ugly then she's on the edge of taking that comment personally

All girls want to be seen as attractive. Just how it is. Personally I would not be bothered being called average but I have an almost unreasonable level of self esteem lol.

Like even when I was 16 or 17 I remember a girl coming up to me and telling me I'm unattractive. Completely unprovoked. Wasn't looking at or even talking to her. But my instinctual response to her was, "cool... you're the only one who thinks so."

And left it at that. She had nothing to say to that and walked away lol. Girl near us overheard and laughed. It was just so stupid. Like logically speaking even if it were true, how big a piece of shit do you have to be to go out of your way to say that?

And even if it were true. You can't change it. So why get hung up on it? You should focus only on things you can control. Like I can't control the fact I'm not every girls type. Even tho I know I'm attractive not every girl is gonna be into me or my type.

Just like there are attractive girls I can objectively say are attractive that I'm not into. So why take it personally? Says nothing about you as a person. Just says POSSIBLY that's what they're into or not into at that time.

I've had girls tell me outright they didn't like me. Talked shit. Some acted like they didn't like me, but went on to sleep with me and were into me. So there's very very little that I'll ever take personally and most things people say doesn't matter.

People speak loudest with their actions and ultimately if you take the right actions when they matter you will live a life you love. That's what really matters. Not some person trying to get you to a believe that you are what they say you are.

You are who you choose to be. That's it

raw_is_war99 · Accepted Answer

Honestly, people shouldn't be offended if they are called average looking. I remember being infatuated with a few girls throughout the years and I showed pictures to a few guys who I knew back in the day but no longer speak to now. Those guys responded with usually something negative either a) she's not that great or b) please, dude, you don't know her. That's how negative people react. I remember speaking to girls in the past of her showing me a before and after, her a little bit fatter and her super fit. I told her, you look beautiful in both. As the say goes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There are things that turn me on about girls that won't turn on other guys. For example, I'm a big WWE wrestling fan and growing up in the 90s I liked this female wrestler named Chyna, something about her and her look with this Wonder Woman persona I found sexy. Other guys shunned her and called her a man, or disgusting or whatever. Everyone has their own preference and you can't please everyone. If people look at female celebrities not wearing make up (ex: Kim Kardashian) they aren't drop dead gorgeous, and sure bigger breasts or a bigger butt can make a girl look "sexier" but that stuff is most likely enhanced anyways. Look at guys, you can take an average looking guy who's fat, he works out, get's in better shape, changes his hair style or shaves it off, wear a sharp suit or nicer clothes and it does wonders where he seems quite attractive. That's my take on it, some people are born extremely beautiful, some people have to be in good shape to highlight their qualities, some girls are naturally pretty so even being 50 pounds over weight can still be pretty. I look at average looking in different contexts. But just because someone is average looking does not mean they can't look more attractive in other ways. You can be average looking and have an amazing persona/funny/positive. I'd rather take that in a girl then a girl who's super hot but has nothing to offer when talking 1 on 1.

Cynicaldreamer · Accepted Answer

Not at all! To me that says exactly that: I look "normal."

I can see how someone might see that as an insult, as it seems like they're telling you, "Nothing about you is really attractive or stands out..."
But at the same time, they're not calling you ugly either.

As someone that sees myself as average, personally it doesn't offend me. But I guess it comes down to each individual, maybe even whomever calls you that. If it was someone you really liked or had a crush on that called you average, obviously that's going to hurt your self esteem and feelings!

But if it's some random person, a coworker, or acquaintance, would I care? Not at all.

unknown175506971755 · Accepted Answer

What is average? What is attractive? It's all subjective. Beauty is a social construct, beauty standards are there to make people feel insecure about themselves. Brands use this to make more money off of peoples insecurities.

Beauty standards are always changing year after year and decade after decade. What's considered beautiful now will not be considered beautiful in the next 10 years. So I don't take it too harshly when people call me ugly, average or attractive as beauty is not set in stone.

Pinay_ako · Answer

I’ve been called worse but to each their own. They should also take a look in the mirror. Don’t let anyone ever tell you you’re not good enough!

MCheetah · Answer

F*ck yeah it would! That's infinitely worse than just calling you ugly! It's calling you unattractive but expecting a "thank you" from it.

This is just me personally though, but I ABHOR and DETEST anything associated with "average." It means you are replaceable, worthless, meaningless, insignificant, and disposable as a human being. You're like a human button or Christmas light; completely devoid of value as an individual and just meant to be another worker ant in the colony, and absolutely meaningless unless working for that greater collective. I know the Dutch and Scandinavians disagree with this mindset (@mia-wallace) and I know there is more value in being a useful worker ant than a useless queen, but being CALLED such a worthless, insignificant thing really offends the sh*t out of me (when being authentic and honest about it). It's like, my life has more value than being some nameless, faceless nobody with a bar code for a name tag.

THAT'S what "average" is, to me, and it's not something any human being (with value) should ever aspire to be.

CuriousLady42 · Answer

I don't think it is an insult. For example, I know I am not the conventional definition of pretty but I'm not ugly either. Just normal. So if someone called me average looking, I'd just say "yeah, that's about right". Sometimes, it's just people being honest and real with you. Definitely not a good conversation starter if someone wants to hit on you but if you ask someone how they think you look and they say something along the lines of "you look gine, pretty average I'd say", I wouldn't consider it an insult. Unless you're all dolled up and stuff of course, then it's a little rude to say you just look average

MAAJD · Answer

I seriously just prefer them to tell me the TRUTH and nothing but the truth. just direct and straight like it is. You can always say the truth without being 'rude'. "I dont find you attractive", "you are not my type", "i dont feel a connection". " You are too short for my liking". Anything goes and i would appreciate and respect their honesty so much.

But if they say something like "You are so ugly i would never date you in a million years even if you are the last person on earth", i just lose complete respect to that person. Although what they say won't affect me one bit, i know this can scar other people for LIFE. and them saying that... I might just do or say something back that will scar that person for life instead.

SunnyFlorida · Answer

As a general rule, you should reward honesty. However, if a woman asks me if a dress makes her look fat - and IT DOES, I may say a "white-lie," like the cut of the dress doesn't look good. If a person attracted to you said you were average looking, you may want to follow-up with understanding what they meant. Perhaps they really want to date an average person because they've seen too much drama with pretty people. Who knows - you need to communicate.
When dating, it is our interactions that make us fall in love with people. When you see a couple in their 60's totally in love with each other - its not the looks - it is their life experiences together than make the other person appear to be the prettiest person in the world. It's like the movie, "Shallow Hal" seeing the person's inner beauty.

Novacane · Answer

I would say maybe younger me would feel some type of way, but honestly after some time, you come to realize how you look and the things you can change to switch things up so it's all up to you. I have accepted that I am average looking, I would say I'm like a solid 6, and when I tell people that, they usually try to compliment me when in reality I am not fishing for compliments I just know what I am dealt with. I know beauty is subjective and some people will find me attractive and some won't, that's just how it is. If I don't like how I look then I can do some things to change that. But I wouldn't say the average is an insult it's in-between ugly and beautiful, meaning you are versatile you can withe go up or go down. I would only be an insult to someone who probably sees themselves higher.

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

I think "average" should be taken literally. If you look like most people look, then by definition you look "average". As in, your looks are representative of the statistical average for looks. Like, I'm a pretty average looking guy, in that I don't have any single feature that separates me out from my gender / age group / socioeconomic class etc. I just look like an average 20-something British guy. Nothing wrong with that. Human evolution coalesces around averages because averages are effective across populations. Most people are relatively similar in weight, height, facial features, etc. The extremes in variation were pruned from the gene pool many generations ago.

K-I-S-S · Answer

Who would want to look pretty/handsome etc?
Too much hassle/attention.

Looks are not something i can control. I am fit, clean, dress decent, travel, read and write books, have tons of skills, earn good money etc etc, so i have done my part.

No need to worry about what they think about something you can't control.

I was called ugly for 13 years, by my parents, kids from schools, crushes etc. Yeah it sucked, but whatever, now it doesn't phase me. I have gotten the low scores, only way is up now. 😗

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

No it wouldn't.. Because one person's opinion don't define how I view myself... Some pink anon just called me old and fugly🤣🤣
I thought it was funny lololEveryone's view of pretty, gorgeous, average, ugly, etc. is different.. Just another reason to not let someone else's opinion of you matter more than your own opinion/perception of yourself...

PeacefulRainDrop · Answer

I think I am average and no shame in that! Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder my man thinks im the most beautiful woman.. someone else might say im ugly.. you have tp be confident in your own skin cause sometimes people try to drag you down you might be gorgeous and they might call you ugly cause they are jealous or unhappy.. most people aren't your friends

CuteLingsAppreciator · Answer

I think it would be a neutral observation, since beauty is subjective to a certain degree, I wouldn't be angry or disappointed if someone called me average looking, the same way I wouldn't be sad if someone told me I'm average height although I like to think that I am taller than the national average.

Hulk30 · Answer

no i dont and ill tell ya why different people say all kinda shit often the reality of the situation is we've been conditioned to be more emotional than reasonable and because of that fact many of us can't discern the difference between honesty and whats brusin to our ego ill put it that way because many of us would rather feel good than be told the truth which in the long haul is actually better for us we're responsible for our feelins and nobody hurts our feelins but us it's emotionally immature to think other wise bein a 7 all around is basically average lookin i personally would rather have an average lookin fuckable woman with a great body and great personality than a bitchy 8 9 or 10 bad bitches can still be cool but alotta em are head aches

ZackBan · Answer

I think more people should be called average looking because it's the truth but these days everyone is calling everyone beautiful which takes the value of beauty.
Looks can worked on contrary to popular belief, a good sleep schedule, skin care, a decent hairstyle and anyone can be above average

Explorer91 · Answer

Yes that’s correct the person is basically saying you are nothing special.
but that doesn’t equal ugly. It just means that you are not what people would classify as pretty. Not being pretty doesn’t necessarily mean ugly. It just means you look like a normal person. Like when walking down the street and you see 20 people walk past. Most likely for 19/20 of those people you will just think they look normal looking.

cloudspy · Answer

Yes, if a date said this to me and was being serious I would not see them again. I think that's the only instance where it would bother me. I wouldn't care if a friend, family member or anyone else said it because different strokes for different folks.

DianaWest · Answer

most people are average looking, despite them thinking otherwise. Gigi Hadid, Candace Swanepoel, Antonia Iacobescu, Angelina Jolie, Adriana Lima are NATURALLY stunning. that is, they are beautiful without makeup. some women who wear a lot of makeup think they are attractive, develop a horrendous attitude, without realizing they are just mediocre.

BeMuse · Answer

I don’t care. People can call me all sorts of names and it doesn’t do anything to my feelings. Actions speak louder than words, and the actions of countless women have shown me that I am very desirable to a lot of women. Am I compatible with most of them? Well that is a different problem...

hahahmm · Answer

When a guy says a woman is average looking, what he really means is average out of all of the women who aren't ugly looking. So it's a compliment. Just not one that women like.

If a woman called me average I wouldn't care because 1.) I never tried to get anything in life based on my looks so it doesn't matter, 2.) I know what most women think of my looks and all of my experiences matter more than 1 opinion but... 3.) See point 1.

DonkeyDan · Answer

Wouldn't bother me because I am average looking. I know a women wouldn't want to hear it though, wouldn't necessarily say it's an insult but it's just not something you say to a woman, this is where little white lies are acceptable. Just like the answer to "Do I look fat in this?" It's always no by the way lol

Anonymous · Answer

No cuz I know it's the truth. Average doesn't mean ugly, it simply means not standing out of the crowd. Not bad looking but not drop dead gorgeous. Very normal looking. Yes it hurts because we all like to feel like we're the hot stuff but the truth is most of us are regular looking humans that most people wouldn't stop to gawk at in awe. And that's ok. Average is normal.

Bjornasey · Answer

I'd say less than 5% of the population is pretty or handsome, it'd kind of lying when you say someone is something they're not. Because if everyone was pretty and handsome then no one is. Being pretty isn't normal. Besides average people look fine, But I suppose average looking in some countries could be considered handsome in others'. Pretty subjective stuff. People compliment my looks a lot when I'm in places like Asia, but people do not care so much when I'm at home.

Ohshee1 · Answer

I wouldn't care what they call me,, first of all who are they second of all if they don't know the person inside then they don't know me our true selves are true persons. Our true beauty is on the inside not the outside outside is just a bonus gift

Kabluie · Answer

I've never been called average, so i wouldn't know. However I don't think I'd be hurt, everyone has their own definition of attraction, and it's not really a choice people tend to make willingly. You can see someone and think they are 10/10 to you, but to everyone else they could be 7/10. That's just how we are.

I previously modeled and was voted Mr. Photogenic in high school, my looks made me money, so no comment can hurt me.

RasberrySlushPuppy · Answer

no, I've been out and about long enough to know some girls like how i look some girls dont. I've been approached by many girls and yet im not the build you expect. Im a light skinned indian guy who never ages. You'd probably never believe me if i told you a girl decided to get my bedroom unlocked by security so she could hide in my bed and surprise me when i came back 😂 I've had many encounters with really attractive girls and women.

Anonymous · Answer

I guess it depends on the context and how it's said. For example, if I took my time to do my hair and makeup, it would hurt if someone had told me, "but you're just average looking". There's nothing wrong with looking "average-looking" but the comment isn't really the right thing to say to a person who took their time and effort looking their best.

DiegoO · Answer

I knew a girl, years ago. She always thought she was ugly. For me she was average looking 🤷. Is not like I could do more. One thing is what someone subjectively may think of you, another thing is how assertive you are with yourself.

For me its Ok to say: "I am attractive as long as I take care of myself and desire to be atractive". Of course there may be someone more attractive than I (in my eyes), but, why that should be a problem?

Anonymous · Answer

It may hurt for a while. But I will know what kind of a person he is. If he is caring about only looks, he definitely isn't a good person. And a bad person's comment will only affect me for a while till I don't understand that he is bad. Once I realize that he is bad, his opinion doesn't really matter me because I don't judge people based on looks but goodness 😊

Youdumbeotch · Answer

People who are average looking just get called ugly or are ignored when in public. You attract no attention naturally which is why most average looking people overcompensate to make up for lack of attention.

in my opinion the world should only be inhabited by beautiful and wealthy people, everyone else is just expendable to satisfy them

SmokinAces2000 · Answer

No I’ve been called unattractive , average looking, hot, handsome etc. doesn’t really matter to me because majority of the girls I’ve liked and talked to have thought I was good looking so it doesn’t bother me because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and there’s plenty of women that a lot of guys think are so fine that I think are very unattractive

Bluemax · Answer

It wouldn't hurt my feelings.

As for people calling a person ugly to their face or within earshot, that's usually done with the purpose of hurting them. It doesn't reflect that they necessarily think you're ugly.

jshm2 · Answer

Depends on context.

Being called "average" at a beauty pageant, for example is an insult. But when it's your ugly cousin, then you know it's a compliment - though you're best not be near him when he's drunk.

Adam1978 · Answer

No if you can't live with the fact that you belong to 50% of the population in the look department. Something is wrong with you. Because the odds say that that's where you belong.

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah that does hurt my feelings. Some people told me I look good. I’ve also been told “you don’t look better than ___” .
Some people ignore my entire existence because they probably don’t care how I look. Looks matter but not for the entire day and not when people just wanna enjoy themselves.

aquamarine321 · Answer

Currently I don’t really care, the way how I see myself matter, I used to kind of cared in my teen years, but now only the people who matter to me opinion/s matter to me unless it’s a meaningful opinion or advice otherwise I don't know

supercutebutt · Answer

I've been described as everything from a "B-minus" to "stunning." I think it all depends on how much of my butt is showing :)

Rachelspiks · Answer

No, because I really am average. It would be neither a compliment nor an insult, but rather a simple statement of fact :)

Cutie0059 · Answer

As long as they don’t call me ugly, fat, or slurs , I’d be stoked lol  (I have bad body image issues, so I’d take anything as long as it’s not said in a negative tone.)

saturnianqueen · Answer

Yes unless I asked them to be honest about my looks. If it’s not warranted, then why the hell would they be commenting on my looks in the first place and calling me ‘average.’ Only someone with the intentions of insulting me.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

They are smart ;) that’s me. majority of us are average looking till we show our other skills that stand out.  looks will fade … what you know, who you are will last.

menina · Answer

I don't think it's an insult, you're not saying that the person is ugly. To me it wouldn't be an insult because I've been called worse names and I don't fit in the European standards of beauty.

RawIronhide · Answer

Its insulting for the fact that they think they have the knowledge or right to make a claim of what it is to be adverage looking. Wht tf are they to judge they probably got a busted face too.

pjf1958 · Answer

I suppose it depends what you compare it to. When I attended Jr. collage, I was told by a very attractive woman that "I was average looking". I was thrilled.

Vikkrram · Answer

Honestly speaking I am below average looking guy, and i have been told this many times, but i never got hurted , coz i know this is the reality, so let's face it.

Bricealan · Answer

Well, to begin with, I don't know why someone would tell someone else that they were 'average' looking, unless you asked someone what they thought? Why am I on here this time of night?

Mollynotgemma · Answer

If it did I’d have to question my own stupidity! Why does that persons opinion matter…. More so why are they that bothered to tell me that?

Floppy2112 · Answer

The truth often hurts. The only inoculation to this is to be honest with yourself. Easier said than done, but if you know you are average looking, like the vast majority of people are, then it should hurt so bad. You just say "I know" and move on.

insignificant_person · Answer

I agree with both your sentences. I know that I am average but I want to be considered as handsome so I would be sad to hear it from some women. But on the other hand if I am average then at least I am not ugly.

Dvchill · Answer

I would tell them nah Get your eyes checked cause u r blind if u think all of this is average.💁‍♂️ Your prob just negging me so u can have a chance with this 🍆 😂😂😂

Avicenna · Answer

It wouldn't bother me. I'm comfortable with my looks.

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

Nope zero as I’m likely below and would feel good about it. of all the things another person can say, that’s the most inconsequential

15_Debo · Answer

yeah  but I don't give a fuck what others think of me what I think of myself is what it matters

Anonymous · Answer

Graphic fictional content warning:
Is the person who has this opinion in a hospital bed having just had their face smashed in by a truck? Anyone who would say that to another person is lacking maturity.

hannahjo022 · Answer

Nah because whenever I get called ugly or average looking those people are not that good looking themselves.

douride2 · Answer

Seeing as most people. Men & women are not much more or less then average I don't have an issue with it. My feelings aren't so sensitive as I'm hurt by it.

sophiejo · Answer

Beauty is subjective what one person likes might not do it for others so no I don't care whether someone thinks I'm attractive or not

wakeupchy · Answer

i dont care. my only thoughts are why people with below average everything feel the need to rate anyone? but hey thats me

forthright · Answer

No, but only because of the number of humans that have called me ugly. So, many would say that's a step in the right direction.

Taylah9 · Answer

Lol I got told I was an 8 minimum by a guy and I got silly thinking well why only an 8? 😆 so yes I definitely understand where you are coming from.

jillybeanns · Answer

I wouldn’t. Mostly because a very large percentage of people are average and below. We just don’t notice due to our own insecurities.

anylolone · Answer

That's the expected result, why be offended?

Even if you are conventionally attractive, you most likely will be average for most people. (the average group tends to be bigger in people's minds than the pretty/ugly)

Would it hurt your feelings if somebody called you average looking?

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Would you be offended if someone calls you "average" in terms of looks?

Would it hurt your feelings if somebody called you average looking?

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Would you be offended if someone calls you "average" in terms of looks?

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