How do I let a shy guy know I'm interested without scaring him off?

[Anonymous]

I like a shy guy but I don't know if he knows I like him or if he likes me back. I want to do and/or say something that will let him know that I want to be more than friends, but I think if I come on too strong he will freak out and feel really awkward around me. I don't want to do something obvious like telling him how I feel, I want him to realize it on his own first before I tell him. What should I do to let him know that I'm interested?

[Dapperthecat]

So, the hardest part about being shy is that it usally stems from two things. We either tend to dislike or fear rejection or we lack confidence. I'm using "we" because I happen to be one (I'm the rejection hater). If you take one of those two out of the equation it changes the dynamic to something we are more comfortable with. For instance, he may or may not way to talk to/hang out with you, but he assumes that you don't.

There are some very obvious and simple solutions to his shyness. Talk to him! Find out his passions and see if you have any similar interests. He might not be someone that you end up wanting to date, but could become a great friend, and you will never know until you try. Flirt with him! Show him that cute and fun side every girl has flowing through her. You might be pleasantly surprised when this shy guy becomes comfortable and starts acting like the confident guy he can be. It just takes a bump in the right direction for us to stop being so oblivious and scared.

I hope that helps,
Sean

[eman844]

As a shy guy myself ill go ahead and tell you that he will have a very difficult time reading you. Shy guys tend to have the hardest time knowing what you're thinking. We don't "freak out" like people think we do. In fact we appreciate and respect bluntness. But if you don't want to be too obvious, try subtle contact. Playful pushing etc. And lots of attention. We're shy partly because we don't think people care or want to know. Showing interest in our lives is always a great way to drop a hint.

[Asker]

Thank you. Let me know if you think of anything else :)

[eman844]

Not knowing him personally makes it difficult to give advice lol. When you talk to him, try not to be pushy. If he's like me he'll start babbling on and on. If that's the case then just try to talk to him whenever you get the chance. Now... he may just give short choppy answers. And not talk. If he seems intimidated, keep trying, just let off a little. If he seems irritated then he is simply an introvert who prefers to keep to himself.

[Asker]

Ok, thanks. He does sometimes babble on when he talks to me. We seem to have pretty good conversations

[eman844]

Well keep him babbling. If you pay attention to him for about a week or two, then make a move. (An obvious one that leaves no possible misinterpretation) he'll be all yours.

[Plato]

Depends on his knowledge of body language. If he's bad at reading people, you're going to have to come off as more explicit, e. g. asking him out.

[MyMohit]

They worst part of being shy is lacking confidence. U should start talking to him first, maybe he'll reveal himself maybe he likes u too.