Offering a girl friendship after I rejected her?

[scooogy]

If I rejected a girl and she moved on (quickly) and later on I regret my decision and want her back but she's already taken, is it okay then to explain my situation to her and offer her friendship even though she has a boyfriend right now? I can't say that I'd feel ready to pursue her again, but I thought of the possibility that she might be single again some day.

[JoshyBear]

You can but if you really think about it, you're sticking yourself in the friendzone. 1st because she's a woman doesn't make her any less of a person, your rejection may be sore and hurt to her like any other person. So bouncing back and trying to reinstate foreplay and courting is almost insulting. You're basically telling her she's an option and you're gonna play it on the rebound. 2nd if you're going to play it from the friendzone, you're going to have to become her confidant and that's a lot of work. The biggest rule in the friendzone is how she chooses to persue you now, and you should be fairly charismatic to overcome the hurdles she'll put in front of you especially if she's into someone else.

[madhatters4]

i don't think it's ok since it's not really friendship you are offering but in truth you are trying to get back together with her. it also seems rather disrespectful of her relationship

just imagine how you would feel if you were dating a girl and some guy was plotting what you are suggesting

[Ccmama]

You should leave her be and let her move on (considering she’s not single or is into someone else). You made that choice to not give her a chance at being a great romantic partner until after she moved on with someone who appreciates her efforts. If you genuinely care about her, you would stay out of her way of finding happiness with someone else.

[Anonymous]

Move on. If she’s taken and in a relationship, don’t try to peruse her in any way. She may not be single anymore or ever again if the relationship she’s in right now is “the one”. You may have missed your chance, but I’m sure later on once things have settled, you could maybe talk to her about a friendship rather than a relationship

[Anonymous]

Following the conversation with the other Anon, I can't quite get my finger into it. How come you rejected her because he approached you at a canteen? What did she say after sitting?

[scooogy]

I didn't dare talking to her since even after she sat down, she never began a conversation at any point (neither me). I thought about talking to her at one moment, but then again, I thought she might only make fun of me since she brought her friend with her. I had them both laugh a little about something embarassing I told a friend of mine next to me.

[coralee]

Don't offer friendship if your holding out for more. Friendship can happen after rejection but only if both have moved on.

[scooogy]

At the moment I can't even imagine a relationship with any girl.

[coralee]

If you can actually just be her friend then go for it. But, if your still harbouring feelings it gets complicated. You have to decide if you actually do want to be just her friend or if your subconsciously just doing it because of the possibility of eventually getting with her. It isn't worth the torture your going to put yourself through.

[Anonymous]

No just leave her alone. You didn't want her so leave it at that.
You probably only changed your mind because she's with someone else, the classic you want what you can't have.

[scooogy]

I guess you're right...

[Opinion Owner]

You'll find someone else 😊

[Naveenana]

move on !!
if you want her back to you wait till she's single

[JosyJosy]

You want her back... don't ask for friendship. Move on from this girl and find someone else

[Mtsnowdude]

I'm sorry you messed up do the right thing and Leave her be for now.

[Anonymous]

How come you initially rejected her?

[scooogy]

I thought she might only play with me like the girl before who approached me the way she did

[Opinion Owner]

What was the approach?

[scooogy]

she came up to me in the canteen at my table, sitting down right in front of me with her friend following who sat down next to her, but they didn't talk.