Is he bad at texting or not interested?

[rkuchiki123]

I've been on 3 dates with this guy from Tinder. He always often took hours to reply, unless we were making plans. When we switched to text, I noticed he had read receipts on and would read my texts immediately but then not reply until way later. He'd sometimes apologize for the delay and said once that he forgets to reply. IRL things are great. He brought up on the 1st date that he was thinking of moving later in the year, to a city I'm actually moving to. On the 3rd date, he said he decided for sure he was moving (knowing I am as well). We ended up having sex too.

The problem is that we haven't been able to see each other consistently. After 1st date, I had a week where I had plans every night, so we couldn't see each other for 2 weeks. During this time, he would check-in daily, but due to him being a slow texter we wouldn't text much. After 2nd date, he went on a 2.5 week vacation with friends. He told me he'd reach out after he returned so I wasn't really expecting to hear from him but it seemed odd to not talk for a couple weeks. After 3rd date, I traveled for 2 weeks and he told me to let him know when I got back. I sent him pictures halfway through the trip. He read my text quickly but then didn't reply for 12 hours. I guess he realized he shouldn't leave me on read, because he's started to leave me on delivered. I'm back from my trip and texted him late last night, expecting him to reply before he went to bed, but I'm still on delivered and feeling anxious about it. I'm used to men replying fast, so I don't know what to make of this. I'm trying to keep in mind that he's a busy guy; he's focused at work and goes out almost every night. Also from showing his profile to friends, I noticed he's not super active on Tinder. His location was set to where he previously traveled a few weeks after returning. It changed back to home over the weekend, but his bio still mentions he's there. So at what point should I consider his texting habits a red flag?

[madewithingredients]

he kinda sounds like me.
this guy takes it slow and you sound like you want him to marry you already. no offense but you need to chill out and realize he's just a guy you're dating. that's how he sees himself. he's not your soul mate. he likes you and clearly cares about your feelings but he knows that people are never who they seem to be at first. he might be serious about or might not, but either way his procedure would be the same: taking it slow.
you sound like most of my female friends. if you reallyyyyyy are bothered, then you should confront him about it and ask what exactly is he thinking because you don't wanna waste your time or whatever.
if he really is like me, then I would want to date someone who wants to date me (which means they need to get to know me, and I would want to get to know them). I wouldn't wanna date someone who wants to date me mainly because they need someone to date. you guys don't know each other very well yet so he has no idea what kind of person you really are. give it half a year and a couple more dates.

[magiusX26]

first off, once you have met in person, stop relying on text. secind, after i read you already gave it up to him, am guessing he slowed down even on texting which likely means he only wanted sex. goid chance the "definitely is moving to same place you are" was a ruse to get into your pants easier, that seems to have worked. unless it was something like months (plural) between each date, you should have at least held off on sex till after you seen him move to that place and probably you both lived in that place too. third issue is you expected long term and meaningful from tinder (the hook up/one night stand app) which is maybe 0.3 percent up yo like 4 percent chance. in effect you were playing the jackpot lottery requiring 5 winning numbers and only playing it with 3 numbers yet still expected to win.

[magiusX26]

i just read the rest of that. expect to left on delivered for months then probably blocked after that. the location change was probably deliberately done. likely the times away such as the vacation were not what he told you. you got played. he set you up to "initiate" the sex too.

[rkuchiki123]

there were weeks between dates, and we'd both be moving late summer/early fall which is a bit far ahead. he was the one who first mentioned moving so he's definitely honest about that. likewise, he also brought up his vacation early on. tinder updates location when you open the app so he couldn't have had his location to where he traveled to if he didn't actually go.

whatever his intentions were, i can say for sure he wasn't being so manipulative

[DreamLife7]

@rkuchiki123 you're a hoe do u really expect him to make you a wife? No

[magiusX26]

you can set a static location on tinder instead. as to the moving thing, did you ever post anything about wanting to move on say another social media site? he could have google resrarched you and picked up things to seeet talk you off such things.

[rkuchiki123]

no i don't post about things like that.

he did end up replying yesterday, we're going back and forth now

[DreamLife7]

@rkuchiki123 you're a 405 he owes u nothing. Next time stop being a hoe. Get some self respect. He's not interested in you yet you keep bothering him. he's literally disgusted

[Xoxocutekitty]

He's not interested in you. You don't have to be good at texting to show an interest in someones life. The fact he can go 2 weeks without a care in the world shows he's totally happy to replace you with someone he can find between when you go and when you come back.

I would cut your losses and find someone who actually wants to get to know your personality, not just when you're in town.

[Amara_09]

There is no such thing as a “ bad texter”


If someone wants to text you, trust me …THEY WILL!!

[AviatorTom]

From my experience, women like to text much more than men do. Which is consistent with communication in general. Women like to tell long stories while men prefer short concise stories.

[coachTanthony]

He likes having sex nothing more. If I had to guess.

[rkuchiki123]

I was actually the one who initiated the 1 time we had sex

[coachTanthony]

He sounds aloof... not super interested not disinterested.

[DarkWinterNights]

Every guy I know is bad at texting, myself included.


That said:
“This guy from Tinder”
Is the real red flag here.


Any guy who is successful enough on Tinder to have multiple dates and still be aloof, means you’re probably not the only girl he’s talking with.

[rkuchiki123]

I think he's cute of course, but I don't think he's the type of guy to have a lot of success on Tinder tbh. I also mention in his post that he doesn't seem very active on Tinder

[Grklad]

I feel your pain its tough with dating apps because there are so many people to be honest he might be talking to a few girls and doesn't want to rush and would like to keeo his options open maybe. I hate dating websites its really tough to build a connection because people talk to so many people at once

[itsclearlynicholas]

So many people as like GAG - I try to reply where and how I can lol 😆

[WhitneySnow]

Yeah guys are bad at texting but he doesn’t seem very interested in you. He’s happy when you’re around and just as happy when you’re not.

[MsProsperity]

You’re not the only woman he’s meeting on tinder and he’s taking then on dates. He’s still searching

[MsProsperity]

Them

[itsclearlynicholas]

Hmm. I guess everyone's just got so much pings, alerts, messages, notifications. Where does time go anymore lol 😆 even to say how are you lol 😆

[boobliker]

it takes me a day or to to reply

[DreamLife7]

He's not interested in you

[fordtruck]

Not really

[FuqUFggt]

Both