Why do plain looking girls get more male attention than the really pretty ones?

Question

There are many girls I've known from uni/work who are very pretty and people are always mentioning how stunning they are. However, it seems like the plain girls are the ones who always are getting asked out and end up having boyfriends. Have you noticed this?

Why do plain looking girls get more male attention than the really pretty ones?

FreshOutaIdeas · Accepted Answer

Same old same old.

Most guys are intimidated by highly attractive girls. As most girls are intimidated by awfully attractive (masculine) guys.

Most people ain't got the balls or self esteem to get what they want. Therefore there is a natural equilibrium that comes out of this -

Very attractive girls will on average date far fewer men than their less attractive counterparts, but have the pick over the higher quality guys. The same way only attractive, confident men have the guts to take these good lookers and pluck them from the proverbial tree.

The stereotype that both good looking men and women are all assholes, is a hollow mask for the weakness of lesser people that know they are such.

Worse yet, they all wallow in their lesser senses of selves.

yucel_eden · Accepted Answer

Prettier girls bring problems to me.

I dated a really really pretty girl once and do you know the number of guys I tried tracking down to break their face in half for trying to date my gf?

Do you know how much effort I put in? I used to get hit on quite a lot during those times but it’s not like guys. For every girl that hits on me 1000 hits on my pretty girlfriend. Pretty girls are a hassle, we think that they are harder to get as a lot of guys also want her and once we do get her she’s effort to keep so just go for an average girl instead.

This is why I prefer strong girls now, I want her to do some of the fighting. I’m tired.

GoldenMelan · Accepted Answer

From my perspective men tend to be intimidated or to not have enough self-esteem to go ask out a woman they think is "out of their league". Just like some women might find it stressful to date a model material boyfriend.

However men should know that women are less visual than them and look first for security and caring qualities when it comes to men. Thus I have seen way more "hot women" date and marry "average to ugly men" than the other way round.

Thing is women hot or not don't want to date very attractive men as they tend to have shitty personality not all of them but that's my experience.

Attractive men tend to develop their inner values when they reach 26+ while the average ones have always had no choice to do so to gain attention from women.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Everyone deserves love. But in my case I can’t win to some guy’s expectations. Makeup=intimidation, no makeup=friend zoned. 😑

But my self love is stronger, which is why I chose to wear makeup or not because I love myself.

But if no guy is going to accept me cause of physical appearance, oh well I know I’m awesome.

coachTanthony · Answer

Well the only thing I can point too is that the very pretty ones are too intimidating for most men. So they go for the low hanging fruit.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

A lot of woman are considered very attractive because they have unique features and girls with common features are more appealing to larger groups of people since people can relate to their appearance more.

Logorithim · Answer

That isn't consistent with what I have seen, TBH.

abc3643 · Answer

Ah... Sounds like a case of Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2...

If you Google "Beautiful Girl Syndrome", that's basically saying that beautiful girls can be bitchier and high maintenance because guys are willing to put up with more because she is so beautiful. Guys won't put up with so much shit and work if the girl isn't so attractive.

"Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type II" is a phrase I coined, but it's a real thing I discovered not quite 40 years ago. This will take some time to explain...

All guys need to feel that they can "win". They view things as something like a competition in which there is some goal that they want to achieve. If a guy wants something and he believes that there is SOME possibility that he may get it, he will get emotionally involved. If he begins to believe that he won't get that, then he begins to withdraw and get emotionally detached. However, sometimes a guy doesn't even think he has a chance, so he doesn't bother...

And this is where "Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type II" comes in. If a girl is really beautiful, a regular guy thinks:
1. There are a zillion other guys who want her.
2. She almost certainly already has a boyfriend.
3. There is no way she'd be attracted to me; I am not anything special.
4. If she did date me, she'd dump me for some better-looking guy who will hit on her and there definitely will be such a guy.
5. She's going to be bitchy and high maintenance. (In other words, he's thinking she suffers from normal Beautiful Girl Syndrome.)

So, he basically thinks that
1) he doesn't have a chance to get her,
2) if he did, he'll lose her, and
3) she's going to be a lot of work.

Because oceans of guys think like this - the only exception being the hunky guys - the beautiful girl either can't find a guy or goes with dickhead hunky guys (who suffer from Beautiful Guy Syndrome). Of course, the regular guys see the beauties with the hunky guys and that just reinforces their belief that they don't have a chance...

Oh, and one more thing: Since the beautiful girls can get guys, they are getting laid... So, any new boyfriend has to "compete" against all of her past lovers and many guys don't think they are going to "measure up" (if you know what I mean) compared to those past hunky guys.

So, a beautiful girl needs to be proactive and hit on men instead of waiting for them to hit on her. A beautiful girl being proactive removes doubts males have regarding Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2.

MrOracle · Answer

It's because a more average-looking guy (or even above-average, but not amazing-looking guy) is likely to be rejected. Men are very well aware that women consider 70-80% of men to be "below average" in looks (numerous studies have shown this), so when they see a girl who is an 8 or 9 or 9.5, if they aren't a 9 themselves, they figure they have no chance. Hell, sometimes they can't get a girl who is a 6 interested, so how are they going to get a 9?

Rejection is often soul-crushing, especially for guys who rarely ask out girls and who therefore tend to build up a specific girl in his mind for a long time before he finally finds the courage to ask her out - only to be rejected. And some women are outright mean about it too. So, lots of guys simply won't do anything unless he's getting clear signs from the girl that she's interested.

And they're more willing to ask out plain or average-looking girls because they do the math - the chances of rejection are likely to be lower with those girls.

I'm not saying I agree with this practice, but I certainly understand it.

NineBreaker · Answer

Out of personal experience and observations, what women consider "plain looking girls" and "really pretty ones" might be very different than what a lot of men perceive.

For example, very often, when a girl tries to set me up with a friend or an acquaintance that she thinks is pretty, I usually don't agree with her assessment.

Also, for a lot of guys growing up, they may associate being pretty with being arrogant, stuck-up, and very mean-spirited, because that is a stereotype reinforced by their adolescent experiences, and to a lesser degree pop culture.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

Approachability. It'd be my go-to reason for this observation of yours. Like if a woman looks like she puts as much effort into her eyebrows and makeup as I have into my video game character... well... Am I supposed to be enchanted by this very beautiful looking thing with Spock or Clingon eyebrows and a face that I know is probably pale as shit if it gets washed because the makeup has prevented exposure to sunlight?

I think the word I'm looking for is "high maintenance." Some females look like... literally, just too much work. Especially if you're not one of those dudes that has no personal interests or hobbies...

No... she needs a man with no life, that does nothing but work, and has all the rest of the time in the world to spend that money on her. Kinda like her in a way.

Accidental_Genius · Answer

Because boys dont want other boys eyes on their girlfriend and they have to always becareful with attractive girls... we also sometimes think that beautifull girls tend to cheat more!

thomual · Answer

It makes perfect sense. Being approachable is the key to being asked out. Girls who dress up, are well presented and fit may be more desirable, but they are much less approachable. Even guys who do talk to them might feel hed have too much competition, or that she'd be less serious because attention comes easy to the beautiful. Average girls are seen as equally sexually comparable, but more likely to say yes and be faithful.

Love2Jackit · Answer

That's simple a plain jane girl. She's one that u can be ur self. It's not all about pleasing her. Rather it's about the 2 of u. That's the way it should be. Remember a good relationship is about 2 people getting along with each other. A pretty girl is always harder 2 please. Reason being most of the time it's all about them and the hell with everybody else.

WalterBlack · Answer

It could be based on a lot of assumptions. Guys assume that the gorgeous women are out of their league and don't even try. Then guys (wrongly?) assume that average looking girls don't get much attention and therefore would be more receptive to being asked out.

purplepoppy · Answer

What guys view as attractive isn't what a lot of girls think.

Liam_Hayden · Answer

1. A lot of men are intimidated by conventionally gorgeous women.
2. Others have had experiences that lead them to the conclusion that gorgeous women, having made it through life thus far on looks, often have little else to offer.
3. Plain Janes, as hinted upon in #2, are far more likely to have acquired personalities and interests in order to help close the gap with their supposedly more beautiful counterparts.

Rangers · Answer

There'll be at least 20 guys approaching her, too much heat, and they usually have shitty personalities, so I'd rather go for a more average looking girl with a better personality and less competition, which means she'll be more willing to talk to me. I can't really do this now because I'm in recovery and can't drive, but once I'm out, I'll take a blood oath that I will.

JSmuve · Answer

No I haven't noticed it. I've noticed that girls who've been described as pretty or stunning are usually average, maybe a little above average, and whoever is describing them as such either has low standards, different standards of beauty, or is lying to them to make them feel good.

I'm sure really attractive girls get a lot of attention. Now, it might not be the attention they want and from who they want it, but its attention nonetheless.

Jemini_Crocket · Answer

It's the same with handsome guys. We want them but we think he probably already has someone, is a player, wouldn't be interested, some prettier girl would steal him etc.

Splintercell · Answer

Yes, beauty helps. It’s the first things people notice. However, that’s only one aspect of the person. You have personality, friendly attitude, good conversationalist, etc. Many guys wouldn’t mind asking her out.
Also, I’ve met stunningly beautiful woman that have crappie attitudes, that’s a turn off.

MrTuxedo · Answer

It's because most guys think they are TOO pretty and attractive, and are afraid to ask them out because they think that they would definetly NOT go out with them.

MrKinktastic · Answer

The 10s often feel unapproachable to a lot of people. It’s one of the secrets of picking up girls, most guys go for the low hanging fruit they think they have the best shot with which leaves some of the hotter ones bored.

Tylord92 · Answer

Most guys don't like asking really attractive women out because they convince themselves they'll get rejected so there's no point in trying. It doesn't help that the more attractive a person is the more likely they are to have an awful personality.

JohnAlaska43 · Answer

I think women choose plain men over attractive ones.  I think we get love and sex appeal mixed up. Yes attraction is nice but if the person doesn't know how to love it doesn't work.

Rawkstar26 · Answer

That's not exactly true in my experience, I live in a big city so I've a lot of both happening. However it's true some guys are intimated by very beautiful women which is why they lack the confidence to talk to them.

Miss_Savanna_Dry · Answer

From what I've observed so far, it has been pretty equal between plain Jane's and gorgeous women. Really gorgeous women get just as many love interests as plain Jane's and vice versa.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

Possibly because they don't look intimidating or they don't give the impression of that you're out their league.

GuidoThePizzaMaker · Answer

Good looking people have higher expectations placed upon them. I wish I was uglier. Then women wouldn't assume I am some successful, bad boy, player type lol.

linaashxx · Answer

I rarely get asked out.  The last guy I went on a date with couldn’t directly look me in the eye because he felt intimidated.

Anonymous · Answer

Self forfilling prophecy, in that guys see a hot/stunning girl think there is no point she has a boy friend or a husband, why should I bother, then they go for a more standard looking girl but those girls could be single any way so maybe its that.

paronomasia · Answer

I think a lot of guys get intimidated by really attractive girls and either think they have no chance or hat she’s taken

StrawberryBabe · Answer

I think it's because everyone looks attractive to someone. Not everyone will agree that the girls you yourself think are pretty are actually pretty.

sasukeuchiha7 · Answer

Guys are usually afraid of asking pretty girls out cause they think the girl is put of their league and are afraid with rejection.
Sometimes they think she might not be worth it for long term cause they might think the girl is high maintenance.

JDavid25 · Answer

Because they don't feel confident enough to go beyond tellin them they are pretty.. And some pretty girls are conceited..

S_Rose · Answer

Guys feel more comfortable approaching us and being bold. Even though it is obvious they don't think we are the prettiest girl they would like to be with.

Kas19 · Answer

Maybe the "plain" ones have cool personalities. I don't know.

watercolor_lions · Answer

I mean does it really matter? A person should go after who they want to go after.

cavmanier · Answer

There's a strong perception of less chance of rejection by us guys.

Piteka5 · Answer

For most guys an average looking girl is good enough, and if you take into consideration other things apart from looks, average looking girls usually win

PrettyRegular · Answer

Many average looking guys think that they won't like them, because they are a bit out of their league. I have to admit that even I think like that often.

Ultimate_Gohan · Answer

Pretty girls are usually the daddy's princess kind of bitches who need constant pampering

Muhammad1999 · Answer

Because the attractive ones usually have shitty personalities

Midnight_Kiss · Answer

Maybe because guys don't always go on looks and see the beauty within.

Jaysonava · Answer

Probably because they act sexier and easier and beautiful women don't. They seem more unattainable or taken.

Texaskid1 · Answer

Good looking women don't get approached my men since most guys are intimidated by them. It's easier to talk to a plain Jane.

traveler74 · Answer

A lot of it may do with the guy being intimidated by the beautiful girl and being afraid of rejection.

JustWorthlessMe · Answer

Because despite the "BIG LIE" men are far less shallow than women and prove it often, however, some empty-headed men will claim to be in some moronic effort to seem "cool"

Tomsta · Answer

Beautiful girls aren't always keepers. Nor they are always compatible

up_64 · Answer

Because really pretty ones are normally elitist sluts or ice queen's. Either of those are pretty inaccessible for most men

Dchrls78104 · Answer

The pretty girls I've seen tend to get inflated by their beauty or be quite empty headed, and what is pretty tends to cost a lot to maintain.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Too pretty ie if you mean make up usually are very superficial and have terrible personalities. Until i know otherwise i try to avoid.

michael45 · Answer

Plain looking girls are less work and are easier to pursue. At least that's what other men I know tell me.

Secretgardenblood · Answer

I really thinking about it I can't find answers the question

krogaan · Answer

beautiful woman have medusa curse they tend to turn man to stone metaphorically speaking

Anonymous · Answer

Maybe guys are afraid of being rejected by the pretty girls so they prefer to ask out the plain janes, who are less likely to reject them.

Twenty2 · Answer

Because more pretty means more drama for the most part

anxietyweirdo · Answer

The hottest are the pickiest and generally have the worst personalities

_yagurrll · Answer

Probably because the attractive females intimidate men

Anonymous · Answer

Easy... "pretty" women are just plain or ugly women who wear a mask of makeup and are essentially "try hards". They are generally high maintenance and highly over dramatic and shallow.

justme1171 · Answer

Because plain looking girls aren’t vapid little cunts like pretty ones are.

Anonymous · Answer

Plain looking girls are low hanging fruit and sometimes a guy just wants an easy snack

Anonymous · Answer

The "plain" girls probably have a better personality, but tbh this isn't like what I see irl

Koreantransgender · Answer

Guys are intimidated by beautiful girls. They rather go out with easier girls.

Why do plain looking girls get more male attention than the really pretty ones?

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