Let's start from the fact that I don't consider myself as very attractive. I am 20, long curly brown hair, olive skin, blue eyes. I'm fine with mostly with all of my physical features apart from my nose ( I got a littl bump on it and I am always afraid that is the reason why guys don't consider me attractive).
I am pretty much a confident and extrovert girl, but in terms of guys I always ask myself "oh that guy is cute/hot, and maybe there could be something between us, but he is definitely grossed out by my nose shape) . I know a nose doesn't make it all, personality is the important shit, but sometimes I wonder: do guys really care about that? Or do they say it just to make girls feel better?
So there's this guy I find very attractive, he's ha bit of a fuckboy and there's no doubt other girls find him hot too. I know him since last year and even if nothing really happened between us yet I can feel the sexual chemistry/ tension between us everytime we see or speak to each other.
Last year he was very flirty with me and he would always compliment my curly hair. A couple of my friends confessed to me thatthe once told them he thought iIwas HOT, very attractive. My only problem is just I COULDN'T SEE IT. WHY WOULD HE LIKE ME? HE IS SO HOT BUT I AM NOT.
One day I showed my friends a picture of me with my hair straightened and he came over and said to me "nice lips" while indicating the picture. Once I caught him checking out my ass. We're pretty good friends; every time he sees me he smiles and finds a way to come and speak to me. He is always the one that initiates hugs and he sometimes makes contact with me by touching my back or my shoulder. He is super nice to me and I really do not know what to do , cause when i talk about him to my friends they are like "No he is a fuckboy don't go for him".
If he was attracted to my looks this much, he could have just asked me out , but he didn't in a whole year why? I bet he can sense our chemistry as well
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I'm not sure why he hasn't asked you out. There could be several reasons and without knowing him or understanding more about the situation, it's hard for me to guess which it is. Here are some possibilities that I can think of but there could be others:
- He likes you as a friend but nothing more than that. I've had female friends that I thought were attractive but for one reason or another didn't really want a romantic relationship with.
- He would be interested in dating you but for some reason thinks you're not interested. Have you been dropping any hints/sending any signs his way? I've had women that were interested in me but I didn't even know it because they showed no signs. I only found out when a friend told me.
- If he's a "fuckboy" maybe he respects you more than he respects a lot of other women and so, even though he finds you attractive, he knows how he is and doesn't want to hurt you.
Maybe your friends that told you he said you were hot can provide more information to help you understand what he's thinking. Honestly though, if he's the kind of guy you say he is and your friends think he is, then I think you should take their advice and avoid getting into a romantic or sexual relationship with him because that will likely end up with you being hurt. When you're attracted to someone, it's hard to view them objectively. I've found that if multiple people that you trust and that care about you are warning you, it's usually wise to heed those warnings.
I also want to address the first part of what you wrote. I think you should stop worrying about your nose. I really don't think that's going to matter to any guy that is interested in a relationship with you. Most of the women I've dated have had some physical feature that wasn't quite ideal (and in some cases that I didn't even notice at first) but I didn't care about that because there were other more important reasons I wanted to be with them. My guess is that you see it as a much bigger issue than any guy that's thinking about dating you does.
If that's you in your profile picture I don't even see anything wrong with your nose. I think plenty of guys are going to find you attractive so I really think you should stop doubting whether you're attractive.
I just saw your opinion on the question How can a handsome man be with an ugly woman? ↗ and I think it's very good and you should listen to yourself. Even if you're not sure that you're attractive, there are going to be guys that think you are because, as you said, different people have different opinions on what's attractive and personality can also affect attractiveness.