Tips on talking with girls?

Adam_INTJ
I have tried a lot in talking to girls. I've probably gotten rejected and had more awkward fizzle-out conversations with girls because I've been so darn determined to push through shyness.

However, I still can't seen to have a good conversation with a girl that goes beyond small talk.

I'd love to know how to better talk with girls as friends. Besides just wanting to have some female friends, soooo many of my guy friends say to be friends with a girl first, then maybe date. Not to mention, it would help when I just start talking with a girl who I want to ask out.

Some possibilities that may contribute to this difficulty are:
- I have unique interests that most girls don't jive with. (I'm interested in news, politics, philosophy, military history, health and fitness, and anime)
- I'm awkward and don't navigate small talk well, and don't know how to let it flow to deeper topics
- maybe some girls think that I just want their number.
- I'm the outsider/weird low social status guy in most groups that I frequent.

I love deep conversations where I can just immerse myself into someone's perspective and, when struggles are mentioned, ask questions about their feelings and motivations to help them create clarity for themselves.

I feel like I've only ever gotten to those conversations with guys and with girls who are in my family. It feels depriving to miss out these kind of deep interactions with unrelated girls, all because of some weird hindrance that I can't figure out.

Let me know how I can make tge most of my conversations with girls!
Tips on talking with girls?
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