Basically, we've known each other a few years now through mutual friends. We always talk, laugh, and have a good time at social gatherings. Now, after numerous interactions, I've realized I'd like to get to know him better. So I added him on Snapchat recently and he added me back. I'm shy, so I'm not sure what to do next. I did send a clever/funny snap tonight that's about a joke from our last conversation. Any positive/helpful feedback would be appreciated. I'm so nervous, and I hope it was okay to snap first. How do you get to know someone and start talking more when you've only talked in person up to this point?
How do you get to know a guy when you've only talked in person? He added me back on SC, but now what do I do?
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It's great that you're taking the initiative to get to know this guy better! Here are a few tips to help you start talking more and getting to know him better:
1. Keep the conversation light and casual. Since you're just starting to get to know him better, it's a good idea to keep the conversation casual and friendly. You can ask him about his interests or hobbies, share funny stories, or talk about common experiences you've had in the past.
2. Take an interest in his life. Ask him questions about his day, his work or school, or his hobbies. Show that you're interested in his life and what he has to say.
3. Use your shared experiences as a starting point. Since you've known each other through mutual friends for a few years, you can use your shared experiences as a starting point for conversation. You can reminisce about past events or funny moments you've shared together.
4. Don't be afraid to be yourself. It's important to be yourself and let your personality shine through when getting to know someone. Don't be afraid to share your interests, opinions, or sense of humor.
5. Be patient. Building a relationship takes time and effort, so be patient and don't get discouraged if things don't progress as quickly as you'd like. Keep the conversation going and continue to get to know him better over time.
Overall, the key is to be yourself, show interest in his life, and keep the conversation light and friendly. Good luck!
I bit the bullet and sent the clever/funny snap that I had in mind. It was in regards to a joke we were at about during our last conversation. I sent it last night and nothing yet. Although it did take him a few days to even add me, he's not big on social media. I'm just so nervous he'll think I'm a weirdo and not answer. I've dealt with narcissism in the past, so these things just make me nervous.
It's understandable to feel nervous and uncertain when you're waiting for a response from someone you're interested in. However, it's important to remember that everyone has their own pace when it comes to communication, and it's possible that he may simply be busy or not checking his Snapchat as frequently.
If he doesn't respond right away, try not to jump to conclusions or assume the worst. Give him some time and space, and try not to put too much pressure on yourself or him. Remember that building a relationship takes time and effort, and it's important to be patient and respectful of each other's boundaries and feelings.
If he does respond, try to keep the conversation going by asking him questions about himself and his interests, and sharing information about yourself as well. This can help to deepen your understanding of each other and create opportunities for further conversation.
I have no reason to think he wouldn't, other than we've only ever talked in person. He was joking about his whole plan for how he'd woo a girl basically. He was joking that he'd ride into the room on a hoverboard and do some show. I said I actually own one. So I finally dug it out recently and snapped him a pic and said "told ya!" with a laugh emoji. I feel like that's clever, and would make him laugh remembering the convo. Does it seem fine from a dude's perspective?
Yes, your snap seems like a fun and clever way to continue the conversation and make him laugh. It shows that you have a good sense of humor and are willing to engage with him in a playful way.
From a guy's perspective, receiving snaps like this can be a positive and enjoyable experience, especially if they're light-hearted and fun. It's a good way to show that you're interested in getting to know him better and are willing to engage with him in a playful way.
It's important to remember to be respectful of his time and feelings, and to avoid putting too much pressure on yourself or the other person. Building a relationship takes time and effort, and it's important to be patient and respectful of each other's boundaries.
Overall, it sounds like you're off to a good start and are approaching things in a positive and playful way. Keep it up and have fun getting to know him better!
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate it! I guess my other question is, at what point do you take it as he's not going to answer? I'm scared to get too hopeful, in case he doesn't. I've known a couple of guys who just played games, so now I get hesitant. Granted, it hasn't even quite been 24 hours. We really seem to get along, so it would just be a bummer. Although, I don't think he'd add me back if he didn't want to talk. I confuse myself, haha. 🤦
I guess he opened it last night, he just didn't respond. I don't know, now I feel dumb.
You’re so welcome anytime. I get you may feel anxious or uncertain when waiting for a response from someone you like, especially if you've had negative experiences in the past. Everyone is different, and there could be a variety of reasons why he hasn't responded yet.
It's possible that he's busy or hasn't had a chance to respond yet, or he may be taking his time to craft a thoughtful response. It's also possible that he's not interested in continuing the conversation, but it's important not to jump to conclusions without more information.
If it's been a few days and you still haven't heard back, you could try sending a follow-up message to see if he's still interested in talking. However, it's important to be respectful of his time and feelings, and to avoid putting too much pressure on yourself or the other person.
Let it be naturally
And don’t feel dumb, you did right it’s fine
How long do you wait before you take it as disinterest? I do tend to jump to that conclusion, I think as a way of guarding myself. Like I'm always anticipating it every time I try to be vulnerable because that's what I've experienced before. It's just a fear I have I guess. I was so happy he added me and we've always hit it off. I just got excited thinking maybe we'd start talking a little more.
Side note, I just realized I apparently can't tell time. He opened it super early this morning, not last night. So it hasn't even been a full day. I'm a worrywart for sure!
It's understandable to feel a bit anxious or worried when you're trying to build a connection with someone and you're not sure how they feel. However, it's important to recognize that everyone communicates differently, and what might feel like disinterest to you could just be their way of communicating.
It's also important to give people the benefit of the doubt and not jump to conclusions too quickly. It sounds like you may be anticipating rejection and interpreting neutral or ambiguous signals as confirmation of that fear. Instead of assuming the worst, try to approach the situation with an open mind and be patient as things develop.
In terms of how long to wait before taking it as disinterest, there's no hard and fast rule. It depends on the situation and the person involved. However, if you're feeling uncertain or insecure, it might be helpful to communicate your feelings and ask for clarification. That way, you can get a better sense of where the other person is coming from and address any misunderstandings or concerns.