Do some guys flirt and then stop because they feel like things are moving too fast?

[AliciaLee]

[jennifer_bloom]

I think a lot of guys chase unobtainable or hard to get women cause they aren't fully sure they want a relationship and the fact the girl is hard to get means he can chase her without committing to her, giving him the right to leave the relationship, anytime he is unhappy with it's progression.

I remember watching a reality tv series when I was 18 and an older woman who was counselling a younger girl said, you don't mess with a guy's thinking time, or he will resent you and feel you forced the relationship.

I remember I played monopoly and my friend and I had a disagreement about what the rules of the game were, but he allowed me to operate by my rules when it seemed like I was losing the game, but when it appeared that I was winning, he got angry at me for making him change his normal playbook rules for me and he wanted to retract the game benefits he gave me that gave me an advantage over him in the game.

That is the same thing when you interfere with a guy's processing time. I let nature take its course and I let God take care of things for me.

[AliciaLee]

You're exactly right, you have to give the guy space and time to process what signals your sending him and how he feels about it. Thats why I dont rush anything. I just show im interested and if he reacts I react back. If he doesn't or seems a little caught off guard I step back and know that he is just not ready to date or anything like that.

[DermalPunch]

No. Men want to keep going forward with women they are into. The hot and cold pulling away come when the relationship is progressing beyond where he wants it so he uses stalling techniques to keep it in the casual region.

Most guys want the full benefits with minimal investment so they start being calculated and manipulative and dangling the carrot to get what they want.

Men are straightforward and as soon as theornactions get inconsistent it's time to draw the line or get out.

[TheSpaceGnome]

No, it is actually very bad if she is moving too fast. The end goal is a relationship, but I want that speed at 3 years, not 3 dates.

People rush into things and end up picking the wrong person, because they decided too early that they were the "right" person.

Far too often women will be TOO into me too soon, and I actually see that a HUGE red flag, and may call it off because I don't want to be the next "mistake" she makes.

This is because I figure if she's interested in me that quickly, of course she's been interested in like 100 other guys in the past and either does not know what she wants, or isn;t picky enough, and either way, thats a firm nope.

[HiveBee]

Both parties are immature because they don't state explicitly what they want and where the relationship is going.

Guys wanna fuck and girls want to get married.

Guys will do anything to get the free fuck.

It's up to you the woman to make sure he's not just using you.

You can't do that unless you make what you want to very explicit and even then the guy might just lie.

So hey you're fucked lol.

[TheSpaceGnome]

@HiveBee I want to get married.

No marriage = no fuck, thems the rules.

Most sane people think this way, be them male or female.

Don't generalize male society by making manwhores the standard, when they are actually the exception.

[HiveBee]

No most sane people are rational and don't believe in silly religious BS about the sanctity of procreation.

It's fine to want to value the best partner for yourself.

But don't act like there is only one truth of the universe and anyone who has a one night stand is a sinner.

[TheSpaceGnome]

@HiveBee Lmfao none of that shit is real (I'm an atheist).
Most sane people are rational, and don't think it's medically or financially safe to cave to sex without a permanent commitment. It takes about 3 years to know everything about a person, once you do, you marry them as a way to show you've decided its permanent and that you're serious about it.

STDs and child support payments tying you forever to an ex are real risks. It's actually the super religious people who think that afterlives exist that tend to fuck without thinking (because who cares about health or compatibility when the goal is servitude, procreation, and some sort of version of heaven?).

Us sane people wait until marriage to fuck and wait years to date, because being screwed over or making a mistake or being someone else's mistake, just plain sucks.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Its funny how a decent number of people think waiting until marriage is a religious thing (despite religious people doing it much less often than the scientificaly minded types), when really its just parents and teachers and doctors and 1990s sitcom tv shows saying "be careful, sex is very dangerous and has serious consequences!" and me actually bothering to fucking listen well into my adult years (you know, like people are supposed to 😂)

[DermalPunch]

@TheSpaceGnome course she's been interested in like 100 other guys in the past and either does not know what she wants, or isn;t picky enough, and either way, thats a firm nope.

This is so unfair and why a lot of men dump women who actually care about them. It also shows the patronizing mentality men have towards women that she can't possibly be sure or think clearly so quickly.

[HiveBee]

The magic of rationality is that is gets around broad generalizations that's are not facts.

It is not a fact that human relationships should be shaped a certain way.

[TheSpaceGnome]

@HiveBee I don't agree, at least in the context of safety practices, there should definitely be a standard for that, and so ially speaking, for the most part there is.

[TheSpaceGnome]

socially*

[Blueeyes81]

Yes. I hate feeling vulnerable and its a wall I face with every woman I get involved with. The second she let's her guard down, I freak out and start to pull away. So I can be hot and cold and need time to push through the wall. Some give me that time others don't. So yes, some guys will pull away even when they like you.

[Danny_dan92]

Personally I’m just scared of commitment in the sense that there have been many times where as soon as the girl would ask me what my plans are I ghost her.




I just cannot bring myself to go through all the bs again only to be heartbroken.




It’s not worth the time and effort

[Pinay_ako]

I do too. Like hold on!

[AliciaLee]

Yes you have to take some time to really know whats happening and make sure you really want or down want to start a relationship or just stay friends.

[nastyb]

sweetie, there is no such thing as "moving too fast" when he hadn't even asked you to be his girlfriend yet. there is a good chance he is just playing around, has no intention of getting to know you, likely doesn't even care to get to know you. don't take a guy simply flirting as a sign of interest.

[nastyb]

if his heart wants you, he would want to get to know you instead of flirting around with you.

[RebeccaC]

Sometimes they can be afraid of backlash if they are going on too hard. In today's world a woman can just say whatever she wants about a guy and get him locked up so men are more afraid than ever to make a move.

[gduffey83]

Hell no, I ride that train untill I'm in-between those...

• The only reason I might stop is if I may have over flirted and felt her pull back and I have to fight everything inside me to do it. I hate this so much bc it happens a lot , my heart is on my sleeve and i believe in just going for it and let her determine if it's a yes or no. You won't know what would've happened if you don't try

[Beautyblossom2]

Assume anything but don't assume that he's doing it cuz he's into you (like playing hard to get).. The way I've seen.. Girls usually get more in their heads about guys than they do

[TheSpaceGnome]

Yes, if she's moving too fast I'll dial it back a bit.
It takes years to be certain about whether a woman is right for me or not. If she's trying to speed that up, then I back off as much as possible into the friendzone.

[MementoMori777]

Yea, you think to yourself like maybe I'm coming off to strong and slow down with the flirting and sometimes slow down with the replies to not look like I'm trying to hard

[DarkOsiris]

some flirt and then stop if their efforts aren't appreciated or reciprocated. If he feels that you don't care, he will stop because most guys understand that if you give too much, women will look down on them.

[spartan55]

No they stop because they aren't getting it in return.

[scooogy]

I was just having a convo with her in the canteen at college before she left telling me to which lecture she'd go. Got me reminded of my ex who took me for granted in a heartbeat. I didn't follow her.

[Alli39]

I'm sure some guys do. Not like they don't get nervous same as women.

[jshm2]

Because you've misunderstood their intentions.

[Wonderingguyy]

I have mates that have done this so yeah guys definitely do this too often

[Sharkstealth]

Why would he do that? Every guy needs pussy sometimes if not all the time.

[Patryk_w]

No, he is probably loosing interest in you as you are boring, and he definitely has a better option.

[WhitneySnow]

Yeah some guys do

[fonduegirl]

I lose interest easily

[Lokiion]

Some yes majority no

[BarryLiverstone]

Absolutely. This can happen and it makes sense

[Pohjolan]

More likely they can take a hint.

[slatyb]

They fear intimacy.

[Anonymous]

Becuase they are likely bad at it.

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆

[Jmmmfi4]

No..