Do men *have* to pursue women?

Question

Do you like when a guy does the "traditional man thing" and pursues whoever catches his interest with fervor?

Do you like someone who leaves his crushes alone, or takes more subtle ways to put himself out there? This is typically more of the shy guy type.

As for me, I don't take risks and don't shoot my shot. Coincidentally, I also don't date a lot, but I've learned to be content without it since I'm not bold enough to make moves on strangers. The few times I did get to date, my exes made the first moves a lot. I'm also not a fan of tradition or hard gender roles, if that explains anything.

Unit1 · Accepted Answer

Men don't *have* to pursue women unless you want to get a girlfriend.

Girls and women are - i'm going to generalize and be unhinged about it - the absolute laziest human beings when it comes to dating and sex, doing nothing, waiting for miracles to happen and putting the burden of dating and relationship satisfaction entirely on men.

If you're the go-getter type irrelevant of your gender, you'll find yourself happening to the world and life more than the world and life happening to you with hopes. That automatically means you go after who you want to be in a relationship with and risk getting rejected ~ 9 out of 10 times.

I don't agree with the notion "men must pursue. women must sit back and look pretty". That's for losers and pussies and lazies and sexists.

Wallythewalrus2 · Accepted Answer

My experience has been me basically doing the asking out and if things go good, then it's always been the girl that made it clear she was interested in continuing the relationship. Phone calls, the pop in visit, asking if I want to go to her place for dinner. I don't think girls play "hard to get" like people claim. They've always made it clear they were interested to me.

PBandJ_Nerd · Accepted Answer

I mean, you don't really have to no. But if you do find someone you like romantically, there's nothing wrong with asking them out. Especially if you don't find someone you like all that much.

Sincerly_KittyCat · Accepted Answer

Nobody have to do anything.  But if a man wants me that's his best and only option. I'm not pursuing a man.

ShellyB · Answer

The male female poll results breakdown is hilarious!!

RavVid · Answer

I think women have good reason to not pursue men because relationships start with an erection.

That is as much of a gate keeper as proposing marriage. Women often say they made the first move but since female flirting is so subtle that men don't pick up on it, it is debatable. In any case an erection did happen.

Also women want to see confidence and gumption in men.

Women are the gatekeepers of if sex happens and if a relationship forms which is basically on going sex.

I'm never going to run a woman down in the street, tell her she is beautiful and ask for her number. Not that I think you are ever going to go badly wrong telling a girl she is beautiful or pretty or charming but it just seems over the top to me.

At the same time you are never getting any if you don't approach.

I prefer to engage and at least see that I can have a conversation first and if I like her personality as well as her body before asking her out or otherwise meet up with me.

Crazyced · Answer

I'd love if women went back to old courtship. I think it's misunderstood that men made the 1st move. Take the handkerchief example. She sees a man she fancy and 'accidentally' drops it, so he notices it and brings it back to her and start a conversation. Who actually made the 1st move? It could be argued that the woman did.

The whole looking away and playing with their hair hint is clearly not working. But I feel if women initiated with small moves that kept plausible deniability (like saying 'hey nice shoes' and walking away/disengaging but staying nearby), it signals potential interest without committing and risking rejection. The man is much more likely to come back and make the more formal move as opposed to a full on cold approach. And if he doesn't, no skin off her back, there could be many reasons why. She didn't actually get turned away, she just said something to someone in passing.

To me it's what makes the most sense especially since a lot of women out there express their discomfort with men just approaching.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Well, really generally men naturally start pursuing when it's all said and done.. Now that years of discouragement on men has taken place to where men don't pursue anymore, now it's a problem.. But ultimately I think guys should pursue but only after vetting the situation, after you know she's interested for sure..

shades777 · Answer

Best that you don't pursue, just introduce yourself and gauge the attraction.

Women already know if they wanna bone in 3 seconds flat.

Introducing is ok, anything more is chasing if. She doesn't respond in kind

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Pohjolan · Answer

Dating is optional so men don't  need  to make moves but mostly women won't go beyond subtle flirting. Also a lot of women have a skewed idea of what counts as making a move to the extent that they believe that behaving less interested than other uninterested women is expressing interest.

Notherndude84 · Answer

Yes you do.
Be a man and have the courage to be rejected 🙅‍♀️. When you court a woman it shows you have confidence, drive, intelligence and the ability to support your future family.
From an evolutionary point of view, a strong, handsome, resourceful and intelligent man gets to impregnate women in his tribe/village. I strongly recommend that you don’t buy into the notion of women owning a man sex, women won’t have sex with unappealing males.

NathanDavis · Answer

I never had to pursue... they never run away

Anonymous · Answer

Well it's still normally the case today and I don't see it ever going away and that is men always having to be the ones to approach and be the initiators I don't see that ever going away and I'm sure that's why most forever alone single people in the world are male cases

Vegasrunner · Answer

Pursuing women is a losing position your job is to increase your value, so that women become attracted to you.

exitseven · Answer

Unless you are very wealthy or famous it is probably the only way to get a girlfriend

Faizam · Answer

Because it's literally the way that if a man likes a woman, he can get her but if a woman likes a guy and that guy isn't interested, no matter on earth how much efforts she does, he's not gonna like her.

Anonymous · Answer

If you want to date, then yes. Most women never take initiative due to some combination of cowardice and entitlement.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Nobody is putting a gun to your head to do anything.

Emmytexrex · Answer

Yh you value what you work for so if you pursue her you will value her and if you notice she is not putting in the work as you too than you know what to do lol

NicholasRedone · Answer

Daydreams of a daydream gallop 🐎 🐴 ride away

Anonymous · Answer

a guy who did not like me romantically wanted me to make first move. i think guys should pursue girls they like

TheStaleMarshmellow · Answer

#Metoo ruined the entire concept. They want me? They can get up and just get me. I'm not risking that much for anything.

Anonymous · Answer

No, I prefer girls who take the initiative.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Have to? No. Want to? I do not waste time "pusuing." I approach and she either bites or I move on.

genericname85 · Answer

No but if you want children and a family, that's your only option.

Gwendoline · Answer

Yes absolutely

PsychicBoobs · Answer

No. More woman for the men who do.

Anonymous · Answer

I respect myself, not for me

strateguy632 · Answer

We must

Kayleigh2005 · Answer

Absolutely

CarolinaGirl5 · Answer

Sir duh

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

You don’t have to do anything in life.

Ladsin2 · Answer

Pretty much.

Do men have to pursue women?

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