Why did my crush guy avoid looking at me?

[Lala29]

The other day I was sitting in Starbucks when I casually look up to see my crush who I haven't seen in two years sitting there on the table opposite me with a work colleague. I kept my head down reading. He got up several times to grab a drink few other items each time brushing pass me. He then got up to put his plate away (I didn't look up). His friend got up to leave and asked if he was coming but my crush stayed. He sat for a few minutes texting on his phone then got up. I thought he left but he went to grab another drink. When he walked pass my table his head was down texting like he was avoiding me. When he stepped outside he walked around the corner stopped to text facing directly my table but again head down.

He is usually a confident guy but his behavior was so different.

In the past, he would stare, smile, remember details from years ago but I got the feeling he didn't want me to know he had a crush.

Just want to know why he avoided eye contact. Is he shy or just not interested anymore.

[Tamikaze]

Just sounds like an awkward situation between two people that have not seen each other for two years and had a crush on each other. For one, you certainly could have broken the ice by getting up and saying hello to him when you first noticed him. That you did not and instead sat their reading put the ball in his court and he chose to do what you chose to do, pretend you did not see each other.

I mean, ask yourself, why did you choose to pretend you did not see him? Sure, you could say you did not want to interrupt his conversation with a work colleague, but honestly people that are comfortable with seeing each other and have not seen each other for years have no problem interrupting a conversation to say hello rather than avoid the person.

I think you both contributed to making it difficult to reconnect. You stayed buried in your book and he kept texting on his phone. Neither of you did anything to make it easy to say hello.

[kennyk]

Meant to upvote, clumsy with my phone :(

[Tamikaze]

Thanks for the 411 :)

[Anonymous]

Umm...well maybe he didn't even recognize you! You said it had been 2 years?

Also, if you DID see HIM...how come YOU didn't say anything to him? You know, like "hey...I remember you from class! (or wherever you knew him from)"

Idk...I could see if you said hi or smiled at him and he completely ignored you. But if you say that YOU never looked up at him or said hello, and always kept your head down, I don't really see why he should feel obligated to say anything either.

I really don't think he saw you. :-/

[lovelylife]

Some guys want to see if they can still get your attention! Its just a game to see if they still have it. If you really like a girl the best thing to do is communicate, not play games! The fact that he's been your crush for years and has never pursued anything, says a lot.

My guess is. If you would've said hello he would've greeted you perhaps exchange pleasantries and went about he's business. Which is nice, but if you want more don't hold your breath! Guys that do this are most likely in relationships.

[blackmaxpayne]

gotta love starbucks... seems like that's the hotspot to meet the perfect opposite gender.

down to business though, he was waiting for you to acknowledge him. commonly, women will always remember their crush or ex-significant other (unless they've slept with THAT many guys) but that doesn't mean that the woman is going to talk to them. guys like him actually wait for the woman to acknowledge them, which you failed to do. he moved all over the place so he can at least get a corner of your eye to raise up towards him, which you should've did.

you have to know these signs, sweets. if you know that the man was confident and things have changed for him, then they will and you have no control over that but you. if you know that the guy is looking at you and you fancy him, but he's not talking to you then you have to look up, smile and go talk to him at least three times. otherwise, he thinks you're not interested.

[TheMasculinist]

Dude. You were nothing to him, just a fleeting idea, it never went anywhere, and YEARS later it still was nothing. You saw him and didn't stand up and say Hi or anything. You hid your face and didn't look up at him or engage him in ANY conversation...why the hell should he? Your body language made it clear that you werent interested in talking, and the fact is he has probably moved on and was texting his much hotter girlfriend who adores him. Let it go. "Years ago...back in the day...there was this crush that never went anywhere...and years later I see him randomly somewhere and he's in the middle of a business meeting, and I'm ignoring him and pretending he isn't there...and yet I wonder why he didn't LEAP up and lick my feet like he used to..." sounds pathetic. he's got a life now, and you're not ANY part of it, get over it.

[yopyopyop]

That's said in a harsher way than I would have said it, but basically that's my thought too.

[LoveBambi]

:D

[sportdistant]

ding, ding, ding. end of thread. somebody give this man a beer.

[hellothere]

Hahahaha wow what a legend

[Mystique01]

Best answer so far hands down! lol :D

[kennyk]

You made yourself unapproachable. I'd've done the same as him. He kept walking by so you'd look up. When I approach a girl I want her to look up at me, give me a signal to proceed. The worst is bothering someone who's not paying attention. I approach, she acknowledges me, we go from there. If she doesn't acknowledge I exist I take that as a no and continue on my way, maybe subtly trying again if I'm really drawn to her.

[themaverick]

How can you blame him? He clearly kept walking past you trying to get you to notice him but no you just kept staring into your book in which I'm assuming you were playing hard to get. You basically sent a signal to him as in "f*** off, I'm not interested" and that is why he didn't look at you.

[Anonymous]

i can totally relate I have a similar story and my sh*t goes on for like 3-4 years- failed college love story I tell ya

anyways I think its best to ignore it and move on if something like that carries over a year its not worth it and full of lies and games both parties end up playing games and its just not worth it in my opinion. you will never feel 100% secure with that same 'crush' because of all the games that had been played in prior years. there's no hope in something that has a shaky backbone.

[MissAndee]

He was waiting for you to acknowledge him. He is your crush so you shouldve said something or at minimal made eye contact. He seems to have been making an effort to see if the interest was still there and even made a last effort when he stepped outside.

[Lights]

I disagree with most of the male posts here.. yes you should have said hi or at least acknowledged him, but then again he should have as well. With that being said it's not entirely your fault, you both are to blame.. playing games waiting for the other to initiate the conversation first - it seems silly.

I'd say he's interested in you, but not sure if you are as well and vice versa.

[candlewax]

Because YOU avoided eye contact. Are you 30-35 or in high school still?

[coreenaa]

maybe you were just being paranoid? he may have not even seen you?

or maybe your constant looking was making him feel uncomfortable?

I'm not sure, I wouldn't think about it too much.

[AustinMan]

I have to agree with the general sense of the answers. My guess is that there's more going on here that we know. Next time, say hello and see what happens.

[MrEM4N]

Maybe when you weren't looking at him he was glancing at you wondering why you never made eye contact?

[6Paul11]

Why didn't you say anything? Now he definitely won't be interested. Nice going.

[AmberChick]

He wanted you to notice him which you did but then talk to him which you didn't... so next time talk to him

[Shimmyshammy]

You should have said HELLO! He kept acting that way because he wanted you to say something and was too awkward and shy to do that himself!

[sportdistant]

why didn't you say anything? hi, or wave, look at him, ask how he's been? I would've done the same thing if I was him.

[xxaphroditexx]

Not interested anymore. Or he may have not seen you, or forgot about you. Bottom line is : he has nothing to do with you anymore. Move on.

[jujubeetzzz]

u shoulda said hi?