I kind of rejected him at first..now he's too busy for me. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

This guy was asking to hang out with me two weekends in a row and each time I told him I had other plans because I was into another guy at the time. But I know realize this is a mistake and the guy I turned down is really sweet and he's the one I want. Now that I want to see him he tells me he has other things going on all the time. He still texts me almost everyday and so I assume he's still interested so I'm not sure why he won't take the time out to go on a date with me. Did I blow it by first rejecting him and is he just trying to get back at me?

[themastaplan]

why do you want this guy? you put him on the back burner, option number 2 and he finally realized it...

to me it seems you only want him because the other guy didn't want you or something got messed up...i mean its GOOD that you didn't lead him on when you were interested in someone else, but really it seems you want him now only after the fact the other relationship didn't work...

not many people like being a second option.

anyways, take it slow, he's probably busy...if you really want to hang out be consistant about it, but not clingy or needy or any of that crap, ask him out to coffee or drinks sometime...

he may be doing what you're doing because he may have found someone else...but isn't sure, like you clearly weren't before...dont be surprised if that is the case...once guys are denied, we tend to move on to someone who isn't gonna deny us...as with girls

[Asker]

Thank for your answer... Do you think there is anything I can do to fix the fact that I hurt his ego a bit, and if so, what? Also, should I keep letting him initiate txt/communication or should I initiate it as well? And it's not really that I put him as option number two, I was just interested in two guys at once and the other one tried to get me into bed on the first date and that's why I turned him down.

[themastaplan]

you need to initiate conversation too...this isn't acient times anymore...girls and guys can do the initiating...but right now you're trying to win him back...start asking him to hang out, call him to say hi and see what he's up to...we can all still use our voices instead of texts now a days too :P

[LossofWords]

This has happened to me before. Chemistry can be fleeting. In my case, I liked the girl, we had amazing chemistry, but she had a boyfriend and said we should be friends. After she broke up with him and tries to reach out to me, but the feeling is gone. Chances are, he is not interested in you anymore, but like the fact that you are into him. Still talking to you for a bit of an ego boost. Even men needs a ego boost sometimes. So if he's a good guy, continue what you are doing and slowly phase out.

[Prof_Don]

You dissed him...now he's moving on.

You literally hurt his feeling by rejecting him.

Don't forget that you rejected him TWICE!

You blew it TWICE!

You can forget about him...unless you approach him first. Even then the odds are slim, because you demoted him to option B, which really pisses off us guys because you used him as a backup in case your "first choice guy" didn't work out.

Find another dude, you completely F*CKED it up with this one. Make better choices next time.

[lordofvermillion]

Here are a possible scenarios that may occur:

1. He is really busy

2. He is playing hard to get since you played hard to get first.

Conclusion :

Try to take it easy and see when is the next time he will ask you for a date, give hints that you're interested. Easy :)

[AlexCab]

Nope. He's probably just giving you a bit of your own medicine. Keep trying I say ;)

[Moloch]

You blew it.