Should I tell him that he hurt me?

[ashleybeans]

Well... this guy at my church.. He treated me really nicely, asking if he could sit next to me and stuff.. so I thought "wow this guy's being nice" and I thought he was a gentleman... a part of me was telling myself, don't start liking him cause I noticed he liked some other girls lol... and yeah well when I started telling myself give him a chance... I kinda got hurt

I know I shouldn't be hurt but I've been rejected by guys in the past so much that what he did.. is just the straw on the camels back type thing

Well... He invited me to this church event... and after I went to it.. I texted him afterward because I wanted to try talking to him I guess to get close to him sadly lol

well when I texted him after the event he completely ignored me... and I know he looked at the texts.. just started ignoring me... so the next day at church I tried ignoring him and he's kinda ignoring me now

i just wanna text him and tell him how much he hurt me because I think he would apologize and I'd feel better if he'd apologize or it could go a bad way.. he could think I'm pyscho since I barely know him

but he seemed like a nice guy and in my opinion he hurt me? I don't know :\ I just hate being ignored by guys now... it really hurts

[JanJan]

So he didn't respond to your texts right away? Is that what happened?

Hun, take a deep breath and relax. First of all... this is not a big deal. Men don't overanalize every second of texing the way women do, and maybe he didn't even see your text. Maybe he didn't even GET your text. (Are you sure you have the right number?) And frankly, maybe he was busy. He took the initiative to invite you somewhere, so take that at face value. But if you try to psychoanalize his every move and wonder if/why he did or didn't text you, you will cause yourself a lot of heart ache. And I'm sorry to say that not answering a text is not being rude. We live in a generation nowadays where people are very entitled, and think that everyone should be available to respond to them 24-7, but that's not how the world works. 10 years ago, if you called someone and they didn't answer, it just meant that they were BUSY. He obviously wanted to spend time with you if he invited you to an event, but that doesn't mean that his entire day is free to text. And don't take offense to that! He's a grown man with a schedule and a job, and he made time in that schedule to see you, so don't be too upset if he can't answer a text. When you see him at church again, say hi. Or try texting him another time. If you "ignore him", he will just "ignore back". Being passive agressive will not solve anything. Big a big girl and go talk to him! Don't take everything personally. I know it hurts, but this probably has nothing to do with you. Maybe he was busy, maybe he was sleeping, maybe he didn't get your text, maybe his cat died, maybe he was on his way to work, etc. Not everything that he does has everything to do with you and wanting to talk to you. But that's okay, because remember... he took the initiative to 1) talk to you, and 2) invite you out. Take that for what it is, a nice gesture. The ball's in your court now! So relax, and I know it's tough, but you can do it. Be your awesome, nice self, and go talk to him next time you see him. Don't expect him to come to you. Go to him. You can do it. :D

[ashleybeans]

Well... I'm not sure if I agree with this. He invited me to a church event where I could learn more about God which could just be him doing what he htinks is right religiously lol while I was thinking more romantically hence he sensed that and started ignoring me... Do I feel entitled? Yes. I just want to be treated like a human being and not ignored.

[ashleybeans]

He's nto completely ignoring me.. it's more like he disappointed me.. I'd rather be rejected in a nice way then somebody completely ignore me like I'm nobody or somebody beneath them

[JanJan]

I completely understand why being ignored would be terrible, and what you are feeling. I'm just saying that I recomend not jumping to conclusions right away. Simply not responding to a text is not ignoring someone. Maybe he had a reason not to, like I explained above. To talk to him in church and mention it. "Hey, I haven't heard from you. What's up?" "Hey, I think I might have your wrong cell number. I haven't been able to get a hold of you!" "Hey, you've been quiet these days." ETC

[WizeGuy2350]

It wouldn't do any good to tell him anything like that. You two don't even really know each other, and based on your post, it doesn't sound like you've even gone on an official date. He doesn't owe you anything, and you don't owe him anything. He may have been briefly interested in you, but he's clearly not interested now. Save your valuable time and energy for guys who are actually interested in you.

[ashleybeans]

Thanks yeah I'm just gonna forget about him

[Anonymous]

Yes, you should really voice out your concerns with him. There might be an explanation in his part as to why he can't reply to your messages after that event in the church you had.

If you keep ignoring him, you might end up drifting away from him both as a friend and someone close.

[ashleybeans]

He's not even really a friend... He just seemed nice at first but now he's kinda giving me the cold shoulder at church so I'm trying to do the same to him.. ignore him, sit at diff. tables.. things that show "im not interested in you at all" since what he did... I just hate being ignored I wanna text him but I fear being ignored again :\

[ashleybeans]

he could of just been pretending to be nice or being polite to be a good person or to hopefully convert me to their church

who knows