Do I tell him he's hurt me?

[Anonymous]

There's a guy that's hurt me really bad over the last few years, and I've cut him out of my life now because I've had enough and can't take it anymore. But I've never had a proper chance to tell him clearly how he's hurt me and how unfair he has been. I'm not sure whether to do this because I'll probably never see much of him again and won't have to deal with him again so I kind of feel what's the point? He might take it as an effort to reconnect.

But at the same time, he has to know the effect his actions have had. We've never been in a relationship or anything but he knows I cared about him (which makes it worse!) and I'm still so angry at him but he doesn't seem to care. If he doesn't care then why should I bother?

Do I tell him or do I leave it be?

Updates

+1 y

good advice from everyone thanks a lot

[anon8]

This could go either one of two ways:

1. He could hear what you say and respond with I don't care again making your honest attempt at reconnection completely pointless.

2. He could say, I'm so sorry, and confess his undying love for you.

Don't count on #2. I would leave it to be to save YOU from heartache. Forget about this one guy. LEARN from this experience instead, by meeting someone else and having an awesome connection with them.

If at a later date when you aren't so emotional and he isn't such a douche, (but mainly when you aren't so emotional), then reconnect with him. When a girl is emotional it's so hard to make sense to a guy for some reason, ya know?!

[airiver]

I think you should write a very long letter and say everything that you need to say to him...Then I think you should go outside with a glass of wine and ceremoniously burn the letter while giving praise to the universe for your experience and yourself for the strength to be courageous and control your own life...Leave him out of it...He doesn't matter any more...It's all about you. Cheers!

[Blackkid]

"and I've cut him out of my life now because I've had enough and can't take it anymore." No. You leave him out, you don't bring him back in or dwell on it.

Write a "letter to Nobody", or a letter addressed to him that you write your feelings into but never actually mail. It'll allow you to express these pent up emotions without risking re-contacting this person at all.

To be honest as much as I feel for you there's nothing gained in tell him how he hurt you, because you're the one who is hurt and he isn't going to have a chance to make reparations anyway; it's more like you just expressing yourself and freeing yourself of the chains and that does not require him at all.