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So I’ve been with my boyfriend a little over 2 years. When we met I had a crush on him and I initiated getting his social media then he asked me out and the rest is history.
At the beginning of our relationship we were all over each other and I was all over him mainly.
We’ve had fights and stuff we didn’t agree on here and there and we’re raised differently but he’s a very good guy.
He treats me very well and will show up to my house with gifts and cookies because he knows they’re my favorite. Most of all he’s my best friend and I feel like I can talk to him about anything. I’m very emotionally attached to him.
However the sexual attraction isn’t 100% there for me. At first I was very sexually attracted to him but then it kind of went away. He shows his love by being affectionate and I do things for him and enjoy talking to him everyday and spending time with him to show my love. It’s not that I don’t live him because I do and I care about him so much and I’ve brought this up to others and they were saying it’s fine because no one is talking about marriage here ( we’re only 21 and 22).
Sometimes I do get in the mood and will want a nude from him or to make out but not all the time honestly. we’ve almost broken up twice because he’s brought up how me not being affectionate bothers him. Once I hadn’t seen him in 2 weeks and he said it bothered him that I wasn’t kissing and hugging all over him after seeing him.
I’m honestly really not an affectionate person in general and I’ve told him that but also told him I would work on it but he insists he always wants to be in my life. I promise him I will work on it but I don’t know what to do because it’s just not there all the way but I don’t want to lose him. He’s the only person in the world I can go to and I don’t wanna end it over something like this.
At the beginning of our relationship we were all over each other and I was all over him mainly.
We’ve had fights and stuff we didn’t agree on here and there and we’re raised differently but he’s a very good guy.
He treats me very well and will show up to my house with gifts and cookies because he knows they’re my favorite. Most of all he’s my best friend and I feel like I can talk to him about anything. I’m very emotionally attached to him.
However the sexual attraction isn’t 100% there for me. At first I was very sexually attracted to him but then it kind of went away. He shows his love by being affectionate and I do things for him and enjoy talking to him everyday and spending time with him to show my love. It’s not that I don’t live him because I do and I care about him so much and I’ve brought this up to others and they were saying it’s fine because no one is talking about marriage here ( we’re only 21 and 22).
Sometimes I do get in the mood and will want a nude from him or to make out but not all the time honestly. we’ve almost broken up twice because he’s brought up how me not being affectionate bothers him. Once I hadn’t seen him in 2 weeks and he said it bothered him that I wasn’t kissing and hugging all over him after seeing him.
I’m honestly really not an affectionate person in general and I’ve told him that but also told him I would work on it but he insists he always wants to be in my life. I promise him I will work on it but I don’t know what to do because it’s just not there all the way but I don’t want to lose him. He’s the only person in the world I can go to and I don’t wanna end it over something like this.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
3Opinion
Love doesn't exist, it's all just sex so if you're not attracted to him, just dump him. It's better you both drop the fantasy sooner than later and move into the real world.
Otherwise you will just prolong the inevitable and make it harder to heal.
So you just stopped being sexually attracted to him for no reason? I don't get it. There has to be a reason 🤔
It sounds like your guys "honeymoon" phase ended and you went back to how you are. It's kind like how once you get something new that you really wanted you wanted to use it all the time but once you've become accustomed to it. You'll start playing it less, even if you still like it you kind of get use to it being there so the desire isn't always there cause you know you'll always have it if you wanted. I'm sure if you guys broke up and like 3 years later got back together you'd go back to how it was at the beginning.
Now with that being said I'm not comparing him to a toy im just using it as an example so you can better understand what I think is going on.
I do understand why he's being troubled by it too. It happens a lot. Like for girls, I use to talk to a girl and I use to tell her I loved her In the beginning, but over time I stopped because I figured well. She already knows so what's the point. Keep in mind I'm also not a very emotional expressive person either so over time I said it less but her consistency of saying she loved me stayed at its peak so now she's saying it more than I am and she started to think I was falling out of love with her. Which brings me back to your situation. You guys went from, you being head over heels for him all over him kisses and hugs and sex all the time to you being able to go 2 weeks without it and you no longer reacting the same. Now I'm not saying you love him any less but to him it seems like you're losing interest. And yeah you can tell him you still love him but because he grew accustomed to the kisses and everything, that's not how it feels. So to answer you question, FINALLY😂 I do think it's making him hurt and worry a little but I just think you need to continue the reassurance. But you need to also keep telling him that you're just not as emotionally expressive anymore
I'm guessing you haven't told him this.