Hmm... You say you've never been mean to anyone but you stereotype and slag off girls by saying "they're all mean, they're all horrible". Except you? You're right, some women are mean, very mean. But guys can be mean too. Girls can also be nice, maybe you just got in with the wrong crowd. And, if I'm honest, it doesn't sound like you want to be nice to other girls anyway, so they probably don't like you because of posts like this, saying they're all mean.
You are not the first woman I have heard air the view that guy-friends are the go to for friends. Well, we are different for a lot of social/cultural reasons but there may be some gender core reasons in there too.
Overall, its not really something I think about much. It is a good sociological question, and I'm a pedant as far as sociological questions go, but this one doesn't interest me :)
Fun Fact: Statistically girls do bully a lot more online than guys do. That got many researchers to rethink normal bullying and consider that the way girls bully in school and other areas is simply more subtle and thus not as easily observed - making them stay under the radar.
That being said I think being a crappy person is independent of your gender, age, nationality, religion and whatnot.
Maybe it's more of a same-gender issue. I don't get along with guys. The few friends I have, and pretty much all people I feel any kind of respect for, are female. The most, uh... "memorable" interactions I ever had with other guys are dead-serious physical fights.
More girls share your opinion than disagree with you. Seriously, ask around. Girls are in very fierce, mercenary competition with one another to the point that it prevents genuine friendships.
Seriously though I've known plenty of guys who fall into the shitstarting backstabber category. But some women take it to levels men never dreamed possible.
If you haven't found good girl friend that doesn't mean we are all #mean. And of course there are many fun girls to find for friend. I'm more comfortable in girls companion... :)
@Transigence well in a sense, yeah. To want to exclude yourself from other women so badly, prove that you're "different" or "one of the guys" and stereotyping women as some kind of overly emotional, manipulative drama queens is the result of a patriarchy that oppresses women and stereotypes them this way. I can't blame her for not wanting to be a part of that stereotype, no woman does, but you don't do that by excluding other women and thinking that you're vastly different from them. You don't get rid of a stereotype by keeping the stereotype alive, removing only yourself from it, you know. These are not "women facts", these are bad stereotypes. Women can be mean, kind, thoughtful, manipulative, chill, drama queens, and anything in between, just like guys. The important part is finding the good people and sticking with them, instead of ostracizing EVERYONE due to some bad experiences in the past.
There is no such patriarchy as characterized by feminist literature. Stereotypes come about because there is a degree of truth to them. Women are terrible to each other. Almost every woman I ask don't like other women either. Women treat each other like shit.
And none of this has anything to do with "the patriarchy" and everything to do with sexual competition.
@Transigence then how come the majority of women I know are very sweet and kind? The ones who have been truly bad for me, I can count on one hand. The ones who have been really good to me, I don't have enough fingers and toes for them to count on. It's not about sexual competition, it's about making men look superior and women look/feel inferior, to the point where they don't even want to socialize with other women. It's more of a mental thing. You know how many times I've heard women say "oh I thought you were a bitch at first, but then I got to know you and you're actually really sweet" to each other? So many times I've lost count. If they keep telling themselves that women are mean bitches, then obviously they won't view women as anything other but mean bitches. They won't even give each other a chance, because guess what? This is shit that's drilled through our heads since we were little kids. Kids that don't know shit about sexual competition.
Yes, maybe so. But that still doesn't justify ostracizing all women or generalizing them like this. You're better than that. Because honestly, the way you talk about other women makes you no different from them.
Society doesn't teach us that women are mean bitches... it teaches us that they are sweet little angels. I don't know how society is in Finland lol but in the rest of the world the teach us that women and girls are sugar, spice, and everything nice.
@the_champ oh really? Then why do I constantly see people like the myTake owner here trying to claim that all women are evil bitches who are only after money and status, even if that means bullying others to reach to the top? When little boys bully little girls, everyone keeps saying "oh he just likes you, it's cute". When a girl does it? She's suddenly the spawn of satan.
Forgive me for being skeptical but it's the internet lol, I just don't buy it. Everyone has been mean at one point. As you say, women are the "meanest creatures" so you must've inherited some of those traits as you are a woman.
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Hmm... You say you've never been mean to anyone but you stereotype and slag off girls by saying "they're all mean, they're all horrible". Except you?
You're right, some women are mean, very mean. But guys can be mean too. Girls can also be nice, maybe you just got in with the wrong crowd.
And, if I'm honest, it doesn't sound like you want to be nice to other girls anyway, so they probably don't like you because of posts like this, saying they're all mean.
You are not the first woman I have heard air the view that guy-friends are the go to for friends. Well, we are different for a lot of social/cultural reasons but there may be some gender core reasons in there too.
Overall, its not really something I think about much. It is a good sociological question, and I'm a pedant as far as sociological questions go, but this one doesn't interest me :)
Fun Fact: Statistically girls do bully a lot more online than guys do. That got many researchers to rethink normal bullying and consider that the way girls bully in school and other areas is simply more subtle and thus not as easily observed - making them stay under the radar.
That being said I think being a crappy person is independent of your gender, age, nationality, religion and whatnot.
I wouldn't mind getting abused by the original Mean Girls. They were HOOOT. It's the only chick flick I've ever watched.
Haha! Kay John!
Maybe it's more of a same-gender issue. I don't get along with guys. The few friends I have, and pretty much all people I feel any kind of respect for, are female. The most, uh... "memorable" interactions I ever had with other guys are dead-serious physical fights.
A cutie like you can't be mean, I doubt you would hurt me and feel good after it. And if you do then well I know where da trash is
Haha thanks, for that :p I appreciate it ^^
Some women can be terrible!
But there are many wonderful and sweet ones in this world.
I have met examples of both.
And the same for guys
More girls share your opinion than disagree with you. Seriously, ask around. Girls are in very fierce, mercenary competition with one another to the point that it prevents genuine friendships.
Bitches ain't shit but hos and tricks.
Seriously though I've known plenty of guys who fall into the shitstarting backstabber category. But some women take it to levels men never dreamed possible.
If you haven't found good girl friend that doesn't mean we are all #mean. And of course there are many fun girls to find for friend. I'm more comfortable in girls companion... :)
I'm sure there is :p
I know your pain when it comes to finding any female friends that don't use you. Gone through that myself and still have not found a single one. :(
Aaaand this is what internalized misogyny looks like.
The patriarchy is real, and it's inside of you!
@Transigence well in a sense, yeah. To want to exclude yourself from other women so badly, prove that you're "different" or "one of the guys" and stereotyping women as some kind of overly emotional, manipulative drama queens is the result of a patriarchy that oppresses women and stereotypes them this way. I can't blame her for not wanting to be a part of that stereotype, no woman does, but you don't do that by excluding other women and thinking that you're vastly different from them. You don't get rid of a stereotype by keeping the stereotype alive, removing only yourself from it, you know. These are not "women facts", these are bad stereotypes. Women can be mean, kind, thoughtful, manipulative, chill, drama queens, and anything in between, just like guys. The important part is finding the good people and sticking with them, instead of ostracizing EVERYONE due to some bad experiences in the past.
There is no such patriarchy as characterized by feminist literature. Stereotypes come about because there is a degree of truth to them. Women are terrible to each other. Almost every woman I ask don't like other women either. Women treat each other like shit.
And none of this has anything to do with "the patriarchy" and everything to do with sexual competition.
@Transigence then how come the majority of women I know are very sweet and kind? The ones who have been truly bad for me, I can count on one hand. The ones who have been really good to me, I don't have enough fingers and toes for them to count on. It's not about sexual competition, it's about making men look superior and women look/feel inferior, to the point where they don't even want to socialize with other women. It's more of a mental thing. You know how many times I've heard women say "oh I thought you were a bitch at first, but then I got to know you and you're actually really sweet" to each other? So many times I've lost count. If they keep telling themselves that women are mean bitches, then obviously they won't view women as anything other but mean bitches. They won't even give each other a chance, because guess what? This is shit that's drilled through our heads since we were little kids. Kids that don't know shit about sexual competition.
Then I guess you've had more luck than me in girl friends. Thats all I have to say.
Yes, maybe so. But that still doesn't justify ostracizing all women or generalizing them like this. You're better than that. Because honestly, the way you talk about other women makes you no different from them.
U can't blame me since I never met a trustworthy girl. I might be wrong but still
Generalizing like that is still not ok.
Society doesn't teach us that women are mean bitches... it teaches us that they are sweet little angels. I don't know how society is in Finland lol but in the rest of the world the teach us that women and girls are sugar, spice, and everything nice.
Yep the sexism is strong in this one...
@the_champ oh really? Then why do I constantly see people like the myTake owner here trying to claim that all women are evil bitches who are only after money and status, even if that means bullying others to reach to the top? When little boys bully little girls, everyone keeps saying "oh he just likes you, it's cute". When a girl does it? She's suddenly the spawn of satan.
Yes really.
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I think you are a diamond in a coal mine. Your points are straight out true.
That's why there is a saying - "A girl's best friend is her mother."
Can't argue with that.. :)
Wow... you had some bad female friends.
I'd love a male friend - doesn't seem doable, though. :(
Its probably true you've had the worst of luck with the girls you knew
You've never been mean to anyone? That's a bold statement.
I've honestly never been mean to anyone. Whether u believe it or not.
I know how the feeling is so why would I wanna be mean to anyone and make them feel that way?
Forgive me for being skeptical but it's the internet lol, I just don't buy it. Everyone has been mean at one point.
As you say, women are the "meanest creatures" so you must've inherited some of those traits as you are a woman.
Whats even worse is having one of your "friends" continue to secretly talk about you to your ex
Ouch..
No wonder the best girls tend to have many male friends. Guys rub off on them and make them non bitchy.
Oooor some are just born like that..
Sadly soooooooooooo true, which is why I have ALWAYS preferred men :)