Women care about looks more than personality

[Anonymous]

I get pissed off when people say "oh women don't care about looks" "your personality is enough". etc.

Women and men care about looks. A short, bald, ugly, obese creepy guy will not get a girlfriend ever even if he has Robert Downey Junior's personality.

No personality will save him.

As a man you have to both look decent and also you have to be confident, socially skilled, assertive, aggressive and funny. While women only has to look just okay.

That means us men have to have both. Both looks and personality. So it's even tougher for us.

It’s not like women only care about personality, they care about everything. You have to look both good and be confident and socially skilled at the same time.

Therefore saying things like personality is everything or personalityiis more important is a big fat lie.

80% of attraction is looks only 20% is personality. Without having enough looks no personality will save a man.

Most women even tolerate a bad personality traits or try to change him if the guy is tall and handsome.

Looks is the fundamental of sexual attraction. No person can escape from halo effect. Minute we see someone we make assumptions about their personality.

So stop saying this personality shit.

[MissRomantic]

Nooooo, like maybe if you never met the person before then looks is the first thing that gets us interested but personality matters about 40% and looks matter 60% of the time. I'm telling you from personal experience that I used to crush on this tall guy who looks like a 6.5/10. I wouldn't have taken a second look at him if we didn't become friends and I didn't learn that he's actually extremely smart, confident, sassy, and funny. I didn't find out till later in our friendship that he had a girlfriend of 2ish years LOL Anyway, even before this I crushed on a guy who looks like a 6/10 because he had a chill personality but for some reason, the guys I've had long crushes on in the past are always taken xD Later down the road, I used a dating app after hearing about my friend's experience on them and met my boyfriend so looks mattered first and his bio a substantial amount because I didn't know him. I would add that a guy's attractiveness is improved by the way he dresses and treats people. If he's a kind and confident person, that's hot.

[KatQueen1313]

For me the whole personality before looks thing isn't BS. I'm looking for personality more so than looks because looks will eventually fade. However, I can't date someone that I'm not attracted to at all. I can sacrifice looks a lot though. I'm looking for about 70% personality and 30% looks.

[Mellontikos]

The problem is that guys have been lied to their entire lives about it.

Girls have been told the truth since they were young. That's why there's a huge industry in cosmetics for women, and looking good is an obsession for them.

Guys are told it's all about personality and it's a huge lie, so they get red pill rage when they find out the truth in their 20's or even 30's sometimes.

[Hermes-Paris]

I'd say younger folks that's true for both men and women. As you get older it matters less. And once you hit the mid century mark you couldn't give a damn because we all look like crap compared to the 20 year olds. I am lucky because I have a woman who looks like a hollywood star and has a beautiful soul as well. And for some reason she is nuts for me. I hope she does not find her glasses!

[likelyOK]

You are wrong the standards are the same, both want both it's just some people's standards are higher or lower than others. Plus it seems like men are more visual, it could be wrong but in movies and tv it is certainly portrayed that way.

[NerdInDenial]

I wouldn't focus only on your looks if you want to get women; get in shape.

Women love the three 6's in men:
1. at least six feet tall
2. six pack
3. six figure income

[Twinrova]

LOLLL

[FictionalCharacter]

That is exactly true. People can give two shits of my personality lol. Which is why I want plastic surgery 😎

[MzAsh]

Yep. I care more about a man’s facial appearance than his body. You can be ripped but if your face is busted, I’m not looking.

[Mellontikos]

Thank you for your honesty.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Oh just put a towel on it😂👍😉

[Twinrova]

Lmao, mostly true, but you're exaggerating a bit. Like for dating, the looks - personality ratio is like 50-50.

[Rose00]

I want all 3 looks, personality and same religious beliefs. I trust in Him 🙌

[funride74]

It's not for all of them. The younger the woman / girl is, the more it's about looks. 30 it's changing.

[Anonymous]

I agree that attraction weighs in more, but men have a greater longevity with it. You can be 50 and still find a younger woman, we can't.

So what's the point of living if you are very unattractive, any sex, and you will end up alone?

[ManOfTheMatch1]

Both are important. They are like two sides of a coin.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, sure they care about looks. But it pales in comparison to how much more looks mean to us guys.

[akanetuk]

Looks strikes first before personality

[btbc92]

Shallow women cares. Women like me don't.

[Mellontikos]

Can you search for Big Ed - 90 Day Fiance. Would you be attracted to that guy?

[btbc92]

I watch the show all the time. Of course I would be attracted to somebody like him for his heart, kindness. And isn't all that bad looking. But here is the problem.

1. He is not a Christian with Christian values.
2. He lies just to save his skin.
3. He lacks healthy self esteem
4. He fornicates outside of marriage, disrespected Rise many of times, can't take a hint with women which is basic stuff.
5. He's old enough to be my own parents which is a No no.
6. And he tries to dress Rose is whore clothes I call them just for so called 'sexy time'.

He would be overly a friend. But not a lover. No way. Attraction doesn't mean you need to date and or mate with somebody. Respect other people.

[btbc92]

He's not a bad guy and I feel sorry for him. But he does lead things and that's what makes him unattractive. Ther e are times I wanted to cry for the guy because I felt his heart. He really wanted to love. But he makes so many mistakes men make: doing it satan's way instead of God's way. And people who make fun of him for his neck disability, size, height, etc are disgusting people. He ain't perfect, but he doesn't deserve mistreatment and judgment they way they do him. Can't stand people who are hypocrites.

[btbc92]

Rose*

[btbc92]

Bad things*

[Mellontikos]

Ok here's my take:

No one who is a good person will make fun of him for his looks (bad people will I agree with you). But even good people can tell he's somewhat unattractive (he's not hideous, but he is not attractive)

How can a person have self esteem when he doesn't like what he sees in the mirror? He should be making an effort to lose the weight. I bet if he lost 50lbs he'd look a LOT more attractive, that women would actually like him for his looks, and not because they want a green card.

[btbc92]

Buddy, if you haven't talked about someone being unattractive that makes you a bad person to begin with. You talk about good people so much, you're a bad person for even speaking about something like this. If a person has to like him for his looks they shouldn't be with him at all. You're the exact type of person I'm talking about. Being a hypocrite. That's why God to act like you, I rejected every single one of you. Because you don't deserve a good woman in your life. That's why you keep getting all the women that school around with every single guy that find attractive and anyone who grow mad that they're not screwing you.

[btbc92]

Every person has good self-esteem before somebody went ahead and destroyed it. There's not one person on this planet that grew up with self-esteem issues, or any kind of issues. His weight at that point is not the issue. How you choose to treat other than your mentality is. If you treat a person differently based on how they look physically, then something ain't right with your brain. Because I don't treat people differently based on how they look physically to me. I treat every person accordingly. You can be the most handsome person in the world, and I still will not like you. It's how you people were taught. And a lot of people have not been taught better. Who are you to judge to talk about who's hideous and who's not attractive? If you don't want to be judged don't judge other people.

[Mellontikos]

All you're doing is denying reality. Women judge men on their looks a LOT more than you realize.

If you think I'm lying, then why do you think Big Ed had to go to the Phillipines to find a woman that liked him for him?

[btbc92]

That's not denying reality. The reality is you people are just flat-out evil. We know women just others what it looked and Men judge others for they look it still doesn't matter. What matters is what you choose to do. What you choose to do in your life. Because you're going to get judge for who you are as a person. I'm a woman myself. You act like I'm anything but human and a woman. But I know and was taught better you don't behave that way. No Ed went to the Philippines because he has been subjected to the same mentality we all have. Go out to somebody who you find attractive, sleep with them, and then decide if the sex is good you married. That's Satan's way. God's way is not like that. He tells us to love, he tells us to show Mercy, he tells us to do things right. Not do things in sin. He ended up when the position where he ended up because he was selfish as a person. And he paid the price for it. And the one who got hurt was Rose. A single mother who now has to raise her son by herself. Bad enough she too is in sin. Sin destroys people.

[Mellontikos]

I used to have girls make fun of me for my weight when I was in high school. Guys too, but the women hurt the most.

Why? Because you want to have a good woman and they are rejecting you. As soon as I started going to the gym and lost all the weight, all of a sudden women were looking at me. I used to get women giving me the looks when I saw just sitting on the subway reading on my phone.

So where were you to be a good girl that cared about my personality and not my looks? I think there's only one woman like that: You.

[btbc92]

That's why so many people are miserable and then you want to make other people miserable just like you. This is not the way I was supposed to live our life, this is not how it's supposed to be caring ourselves as adults, and this is not how we're supposed to be teaching our children. Who is a lot of women are going to be judging a man's looks a lot more, we're the ones that have to birth your kids and ensure procreation. People will Common Sense who truly do have love, we're not even worried about that. Children are children. If you can't love the person because they don't look appealing to you, that says a lot about you as it is. It means your heart needs to change.

[Mellontikos]

Wow you are making so many assumptions about me. Can I ask you why you are not married yet to a great man? Or are all men evil?

[btbc92]

No we are everywhere. But you find us boring. You want to do like everybody else do. You want to haul around every other chick you can fine. Or you want that one girl that you can screw around with for sex. That's all it is. Of course you going to have people like that making fun of you for you wait. You act like you're the only one that's been bullied in the world. I have been bullet to throughout my entire life. A good woman won't bully you, won't use you, won't hurt you. And you had to learn the hard way of how this world works. This world is evil. Of course more when they're going to be looking at you, they looking for a person that can use. And she's only looking at you at somebody that she can see having sex with for the sake of sex. She don't really know you. And often times it's all about the self. That's not love. That's lust.

[btbc92]

First of all I would have been married at 18 if anybody wanted to do so. I am a Christian with those values. You get told nobody is going to want you for a girlfriend, mother, or wife becaus eyou refuse sex before marriage. And get called a religous prude. I'm not going to get hurt any further and have myself destroyed, get further physically sick is not gafa been mentally sick because of you people. You take what's good and you destroy it. That goes for men and women. I'm not making assumptions about you I can see what's in your heart already. Your mind is of the world, and then you act like the world, and then you complain about what the world done to you. I don't live in act like the world, and I understand how the world is. But I refuse to get mistreated. Your way of thinking is extremely toxic. Because of you is that same person that was truly wonderful, the Hat a good heart back in high school and you kept that good heart, you would not be behaving this way. You should lose weight for yourself. Not for other people. Not to be people pleasing for others. That's your problem. See I learned from that way younger than you were. And I had to learn to love myself first, before I try to give that love to other people. Otherwise they'll just take and take and you will get Harley anything in return even if you did deserve better.

[btbc92]

And just because you're around good people, they still have choices they can make two. And if they don't personally choose you, you're still alone. You can't control others lives. Not everybody is meant to be in a relationship. And these days it's safer to be alone than to be involved with somebody who may God forbid it use you, abuse you, or get you killed. Hardly anybody wants real commitment anymore, and it's sad. I can't force anybody to trust me, care for me, love me, Etc. I have to do it for myself and I have to do it on my own. Because whether you're by yourself or with somebody else, you still have to live your life. Nobody else can live it for you. For you are born alone, and you die alone. Sometimes God allows you not to be involved with anybody four years in order for you to learn, to grow, to mature, to get yourself into a level where you can be in a stable relationship. Where you do have something to offer somebody. You don't get into a relationship for yourself just by yourself. You do it because you want to serve a purpose in someone's life. It's servitude. So if you're not prepared for servitude you best to stay single

[Mellontikos]

You have some decent insight, but it doesn't help me to not be part of the world. Do you think if I have found a girl like you that I wouldn't have married her immediately?

I never found one. Looks don't matter, church doesn't matter. Most girls are the same, trained to want only the hottest guys. I used to go to church. Girls didn't make fun of me, they just didn't want to talk to me. You can say that those women were of this world too, but then again everyone is, otherwise YOU would be married and I would be married. So where is your god now?

[Mellontikos]

Ok so no help from god. So what's the point of even having a god then?

[btbc92]

The problem has to do with you because you refused to change. No. You would have married her and she would have been miserable because you're not happy within yourself and you don't even know who you are as a person. You shed your old self away just to be part of the world parrot and yes you can call but you already made your choice. You need to ask that question what is the point of having God in your life. I have the father in my life because I want him there. Your purpose in this life is however he called for your life to be. You have to be in obedience and you haven't been in obedience. Again, you only think about yourself, and you only care about yourself. You have this pity me and woe is me attitude. Thinking that you're the only one that had a miserable life. The only one that's been hurt. And you're forgetting there are others such as myself who went through more hell than you ever went through your entire lifetime. I grew up in a domestically abusive home. I've been hit with a belt, get scratches and bruises. I've been swept before, stomped on before by bullies. Been threatened multiple times. Guys threatened to have me killed. Be it by choking, knife, or gun. I have been sexually harassed, have had unwanted touching which you can consider as rape depending on the law of your country or state. Things stolen from me, falsely accused, sometimes suspended for no reason, had fight started for no reason, threatened to go to jail, lost my mother to cancer, I had a lot things happening to me. And here you are whining.

[Mellontikos]

It sounds like you're still very bitter about your own life and you're projecting it to others, like me.

[btbc92]

No I realized that according to his word is everything of what he said it is. There are those who are called to marriage, others who are not. And people who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the Kingdom. Not everybody is meant to be married, and there are those who are. Plenty who shouldn't are, and those who should aren't. This world is backwards and you're not seeing that it's backwards. The reality is things are not the way how God intended it to be and it's getting out of control. It's exactly like how I said before. They want to do those things in sin and that includes in marriage. I refuse to have an ungodly relationship and marriage, they don't want me anyway. You have a is a different story. You judge things according to the things of the world, and you will get judge back according to the things of the world. For you, you getting your just Rewards because you made the choice to accept it. I don't.

[btbc92]

Now, I'm getting a few left and right this trying to date me and marry me, but the problem is I don't know them, I don't care about that life anymore, my focus is on God, and I'm sick and tired of getting hurt. I don't trust guys on that level anymore. I didn't even have rational logical reasons to even be Desiring that in the first place and I didn't even have much of that desire growing up. That was forcing expected of me because of exactly what we're talkin about. Because I'm so cold attractive. But no one bothered to ask me what I wanted in life as if I didn't have a choice or say or voice. You try to deviate from that you are wrong. You don't get married or you may go to hell. That's not even in the Bible, yet that was thrown at me. You made the choice to get out of church. But God is God. You don't need a church building just to be part of the church. But you go to church so that you can get the feeding and that you can gain wisdom is not fellowship with others who shares your same beliefs. It's not a religion it's a relationship. But not all churches operate on anything but a religion. Even the Lord said this was not what he intended for my life but he had to allow it to happen anyway, because he had to show me things that can one day help other people. Your life is not only for yourself it's for others. So if you don't change what's in your heart, you going to keep a track in those kind of people.

And first of all I'm not bitter about my life. And I'm not projecting on others. I'm showing you through testimony that you like everybody else is living in sin. And until you change your life around, you're going to keep having those problems.

[btbc92]

That's not me being bitter. That's me expressing my heart because I am a loving and caring individual, and you people claim you looked people that I like that, but you really don't. Because you refused to see yourself. I have self-awareness. And everything I speak of is the truth. I speak what I speak because again I am tired of hypocrites. And I now refuse to stay silent about it any longer. What makes it worse? you people think there's no one that sees with the things you do and won't speak up about it. I have eyes to see, and God has given me the Insight in the wisdom of not only the spiritual things with the physical, and I refuse to turn a blind eye to it. If you want good things to start happening in your life you have to start doing the right things. You can't worry about what other people choose to do with there lives. God would have wanted me to be involved with somebody. But like he said before. They reject me, they reject him. And anybody that claims they want to be involved with me will have to go through him first. God protected me from bad people. Sometimes rejection from others is God's way of showing love to you because he knows your future and he knows the hearts of people. Not if you choose to do so anyway out of Disobedience then he cannot protect you any further because he's not going to override your free will. I stayed single because I chose to obey my Lord. And I was not going to get involved in anything that I know nothing of, and that I can't be responsible for. And I refuse to do it in sin. I rather not go to hell over something trivial like that.

[btbc92]

There's nothing wrong with being married and does nothing wrong being single. It's what you choose to do with it that's going to matter. If you abused your singleness for whoredoms sometimes God will allow you to be married just to put you in check. And if you're abused your marriage sometimes God will allow you to be single because all you would do will just destroy other people. In the end God is in control.

Plus a lot of those guys didn't like me anyway because I made them insecure about themselves, and they think I'm too perfect than them. Sometimes you're not single because you're so ugly. They have a study that says that most people that are intelligent tend to make a less friends and have a hard time finding mates because your intelligence level is a lot more higher than others.

[Mellontikos]

Ok so you're talking to a guy who speak Greek and has read the Greek New Testament , particularly the Gospels in detail.
The passage you are quoting about Eunuchs, Jesus is talking about a man literally crushing his testicles to follow God.

Matthew 19:12:
"For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it."

1. Some men were born asexual
2. Some men were made eunuchs by men (they were castrated by someone else, not of their choice)
4. Some men made themselves eunuchs (they castrated themselves).

That is one of the weirdest Bible passages to be honest, and I still don't know why Jesus would say such a thing.

Mind you I'm agnostic, so I don't even know if there is a God or not.

[btbc92]

God created you and has a calling for everybody. He doesn't care what your religion is or your belief system is or what you want to call yourself. At the end of the day, he is in control. It's not confusing. A eunuch is somebody like me. Somebody who is able to have sexual relations but choose not to engage in it. It is also called celibacy. And asexuality is not a thing. We are all born sexual beings. Be careful what you're quoting and from what.

[btbc92]

Every human being on this planet is sexual. But not everybody is capable of having sex. Think of those born with disabilities, defects, etc. The rest of us who is capable of making sexual choices is able to have sex. BUT, not everybody will be given into marriage or called to having a sex life. That's why now people just have premarital sex and marry whoever, hurt, use and abuse God's system. This is why your suffering. This is why people like me suffer. Because it's not only hard to find suitable mates, you don't want to get involved with people what just going to use and abuse you anyway just for pleasure. Better to be sexless than diseased up, have unwanted kids, a psych house because of the sexual abuse you or somebldy else done to you or end up because you cheated, got involved with crazy, or an STD turned into a cancer.

Those who lack healthy sexual organs cannot have sex. As long as one has a penis or vagina, unless you have a health problem, thou can have sex. Another logical reasons to refrain from sexual relations is unless you have a gene that can be passed onto the offspring that can cause them harm, or God forbid get you killed. That's what Jesus was talking about. Some find their mates very young as some of my now married friends did. Married at 18. Others like myself didn't, and may be at the wrong place at the wrong times. Life happens. But, no matter how bad you like me be, again God is still in control. If it is his will in your life for you to get married, then no matter how long it will take, if you truly desire it, you will get married. But you have to be in obedience.

[btbc92]

How bad your life Maybe*

God has never once told anybody to physically hurt themselves. If a man actually crushed himself he would have been dead. It's literally linked to the heart and brain for men. That's why your extremely sensitive to touch with your penis and testicles. And if you're actually referring to circumcision, we don't have to do that anymore because we're no longer under the law. But we still have to obey and respect the law as it hasn't done away with bit has been fulfilled by Jesus. That's why you follow him. Because if not then you will be judged according to the law and you will die by the law. Because the punishment for sin is death. And "death" has many meanings not just the physical. Since we already born in sin, then we will eventually die. The body dies and will suffer in this life anyway. But it is better for your soul to be saved and suffer less, than to try to save your life and suffer worse.

[btbc92]

End up dead*

[btbc92]

I chose to be forever single because the cons outweigh the benefits for me. Not worth the risk or hell. And you can't just get up and marry just anybody anyway. Because if you do you don't know what generational curses you could be putting on yourself or your children, let alone marry into. Think about that also. This is why you see certain families have prostitution, drug abuse, history of criminal activity, or even debt. I don't care how attractive we women are. Don't let us be the cause of your demise. I don't care how badly you want us. You want real answers? Turn to that Greek bible of yours or read King James version online. Let God guide you and don't try to lead yourself. Because I'm telling you by experience you will fail if you don't listen.

[Mellontikos]

Be careful what I'm quoting? I have no worries since I know what the language means, particularly in the originals.

[Mellontikos]

Wow, I guess you don't know the history. Castration was common in those times. Search for the Castrati for an idea. Men did in fact lose their testicles, sometimes because other men would do it, and sometimes they would do it to themselves.

That's what Eunuch means. It was more common than today for sure. Those times could be very barbaric. But the reason it was even done, is because for men, most of the sexual desire comes from hormones released by the testicles. In modern times, if a man had to get his testicles amputated, lets say due to cancer, the side effect will be that he loses most of his sex drive. He doesn't want to have sex anymore.

[btbc92]

Uh, I know exactly what the history says and the human anatomy. I have plenty of anatomy booms here. And no, your quoting wrong. Your Greek bible sounds like it is poorly translated and isn't accurate. Everything what your saying is wrong.

[btbc92]

We know men lost their testicles back then. What your talking about overall is circumcision, not castration. Because that was not what Jesus was talking about.

[Mellontikos]

Ok, who knows how to speak Greek? = me
Who doesn't? = you.

[zagor]

Danny DeVito got married.

[who_dey86]

To a troll lol. Jk Rhea

[Knuxx]

Danny DeVito was also wealthy. Ignore wealth and he slides down the attractiveness scale far and fast.

[theChineseWASP]

@Knuxx I don’t see how money alone could have made up for his looks lol he better have a good personality too ha ha

[Knuxx]

I figured that was obvious.

[zagor]

@who_dey86 Just goes to show that you need to adjust your standards to your reality.

[Drumlin2001]

How short is short? Is 5'9" short?

[Anonymous]

Yes. So what? Men too. Probably even more lol.

[rxhldas]

Search Big Ed on YouTube , you will be surprised

[SecretGardenBlood65]

Good take