Caricatures are exaggerations of certain aspects, generally used to make some type of point.
I recall occasionally seeing strong aggressive women when I was a kid, but this image was most common among butch lesbians rather than the population as a whole.
In the late 60s, the hippie movement was at its peak. Hippies wanted to be different, yet all you had to do was look at them to know they were hippies. Their difference was still conforming to the hippie image. Maybe these experiences led women to feel strength they didn't previously believe they had.
In the 70s, women more overtly attempted to shatter the glass ceiling, claiming they were just as good as men and set out to prove they could do everything men did… better. They started dressing like men and acting like men, though they appeared more as caricatures than true men. Maybe this step was necessary to get guys to accept women in the workplace. Unfortunately, these women overlooked their true assets in choosing to be men. Women have a lot to offer. They can see things guys often can’t see. They are more aware of how things impact others than men tend to be. They’re more likely to see the bigger picture. This true insight of women is a significant addition to any situation. Unfortunately, these women tended to overlook or minimize their natural qualities when they chose to be male caricatures.
Animals raised by different species tend to take on characteristics of the species that raised them, but a cat raised by a dog will still be a cat. Our parents' characteristics tend to rub off on us. We won’t be exactly like them, but we will take on certain of their idiosyncrasies. Societal patterns also tend to rub off on us. We conform to what is common or draws attention or appears to add some sort of perceived value.
What tends to be promoted nowadays is in your face power and aggression in women. Women are tired of being passive, scared and weak, so they’re doing their best to become the opposite extreme. In reality, all extremes tend to be dysfunctional. They come across as being a reaction to something rather than an expression of what’s real.
Let me differentiate between assertion and aggression. With both, our objective is to get to our end goal as quickly and efficiently as possible. The difference is this. When we are aggressive, we just take the shortest straightest path to our objective. We don’t care if we charge through brambles or step on anyone, as all we care about is getting where we want to be. When we are assertive, we still focus on the end goal, but we see our path with a broader perspective. We see someone over here we can help, or someone over there who can help us. We see how we can get around obstacles rather than pushing our way through them. It may not be as direct, but it tends to be easier, more productive and leaves us feeling better after we accomplish our goals. Aggression leaves us feeling beat up, leading us to focus blame on whatever held us back or caused us any discomfort rather than look at our own choices.
Society sees Diva as a positive label, yet Divas are self-important people who are temperamental and difficult to please. Aggression is more commonly seen among women than it was when I was younger. The question is whether it is necessary or productive. Is this self-centeredness, lack of sensitivity to others, and tendency to be critical and controlling being true to what makes a woman a woman? Is she using what is natural to her essence to move forward in an assertive manner, or is she denying her true essence, in order to become a caricature of male aggression? I’m not promoting a return to the time when women were meek and mild, but is there a happy medium that would truly be more functional?
Just look at politics. More positive growth has occurred in our country when centrists were in control than when extremists were in control. All extremes need to be balanced by the opposite extreme, so the primary goal becomes preventing the other side from winning rather than looking for compromises that allow everyone to win. Extremists just get in each others’ way, and little is accomplished.
I am only one person, so I don’t have the power to change societal norms. I just hope I’m able to plant a seed that triggers some people to think and broaden their perspective to see other options. It’s not about what I see as right, but look at the choices you are making, and ask yourself whether they truly are taking you toward your long-term objectives. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. The solution is not necessarily what’s familiar. Life is not a competition to see who ends up on top. He who dies with the most toys is still dead.
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