Okay i see this as both you twos fault.
Firstly women crave attention we can't help it. It boost are self esteem. I try hard not to do this myself and when i push these guys away for there own good im a bitch and up myself so i can see its hard when theirs a nice guy paying you attention and making you feel good about yourself to tell him to go away and that your not interested because either way your gonna hurt his feelings and sometimes they will just see you as a male friend.
You on the other hand should have been honest with your intentions from the the beginning. She didn't lead you on. You played the long game, which you should never do it gets you instant friend zoned because she's assumes you would have made a move earlier on. She never expressed romantic interest in you from the sound of it and your not intitled to a relationship with a girl just because you were nice to her. If she never expressed romantic feelings for you that was a clear indication she wasn't interested if she did then yeah she lead you on fair and square. But she was seeing others guys and not you doesn't that ring alarm bells but she wasn't interested in you? because if she was dating around and happened to like you in that way don't you think she would have done something about it herself and told you she liked you.
Because she uses cute girl you was talking to. She knows she's cute because your not the only guy who told her that. I'm pretty sure she had problems. Obviously for her to do that but this is why you don't chase, pursue and try to date somebody just because their this or that. Women can't be honest because sadly what you did from the jump. Chase after a girl or woman. Men sadly don't want to listen to women so in the end we do what we have to do for us. And besides, you sure you would have tried of she told you all of That? Being vulnerable to just anyone is not a good thing. You had the intent to date her, she obviously did not. I say if you never told her from day one you wanted to date, this is on you. Not her. But she has to figure herself out. Either way you were better off a friend.
Let's reword the question and remove the bias:
"Why do people lead each other on?"
Good question; I think the answer is probably because those people like to have power and control over others, receiving attention and feeling important. In short, they likely have a personality issue that prevents them from behaving respectfully. Some people enjoy the use and abuse so much that they seek that more than a person. Others may seek to be given attention, again due to a psychological issue where they may not have received any, or have a personality disorder.
I understand you were hurt by someone, and may be looking for answers, or a way to complain about the situation. Use that anger appropriately, and learn from it. Trust is earned; ask yourself what she did to earn your trust, and how she responded when talking or chatting. If you need to look at conversation logs, do so.
Not all people are users, or spend people for favors, but a good portion of them are. People are broken, in general.
I think I'm in a similar situation, girls say one thing, then do another. Why?
If we're not honest, we're called "pieces of sh…" right? But if they do it, what should me call them? Don't do unto others what you don't want done unto you, right?
I feel your pain man, been there several times, you trust, because you're a Good man. Don't let that change you. Keep your head up and keep on doing what you're doing. From my experience, once you go No Contact (with anybody) and they see that they've messed up by treating you that way, they'll come looking for you. Guaran-fuckin-teed That's when you strike! They don't know what they've got til its gone. Trust me.
- If you don't mind sharing your take on my question, I'd really appreciate it, man.
Thanks in advance.
She says she isn't flirting but she doesn't treat me like a friend at all?
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I'm just curious how she was leading you on and seeing other guys at the same time? Isn't that a clear indicator that she's probably not interested in you? I'm not saying you're lying, I'm just confused.
Some girls lead guys on for attention and to boost their self esteem and ego.
If you liked her, why didn't you told her for a whole year?
Maybe you didn't make a move so she was trying things with other guys. No one can wait forever, some people just have less patience. Besides, if you never told her how you felt and she wasn't your girlfriend, why couldn't she be dating someone?
I think it's better too trust to much, than to little. I rather risk getting hurt than hurting someone who really needs me. But how come didn't you saw any of those lies sooner? Why kind of lies are you talking about? So, yes you should trust people, but not for that long without any evidence..
I don't wanna be just negative. I do agree what she did is bad because she lied (about?), and you did acted correctly. She was mean to you. Still, if she's wasn't your girlfriend she's allowed to date guys without having to tell you.
A lot of girls and guys I think don't know what they really want in a relationship. I have tendency to be too nice to men or everyone and that has not worked for me. Most guys think I am week minded if I am too nice. I also can be really shy and not tell people how I feel. There are a few guys I like that look like great guys but I don't feel confident or feel I am not worthy of them. Plus most of the time I am at work when I see them, I can't really get social with people to long there. I don't really go out much so I never meet the guys anywhere else.
I can honestly say this doesn’t apply to ALL girls but I will admit most women I know do this and I personally don’t agree with it. Mainly because I have experienced that awful feeling from a guy who led me on for a year and lied about everything. It’s the worst feeling in the world. No one deserves to go through that. So it pisses me off when I see women basically manipulating men in that same way, but if I call them out on their bull, they say I’m lame because I don’t live their lifestyle. Ok then.
Women and men both lead people
Just because you're hurting doesn't mean doesn't mean this applies to all women
She led you on and that was wrong of her
My ex fiance led me on as well for a lot longer than a year and I didn't once afterwards get pissed at the innocent women
I'm sure women ask the same question about men but a little advice
Better yourself stop asking why and prove to her and yourself that you can succeed without her
Rejection is the most important teacher learn from it
First off, men are just as guilty of leading women on. That's not a gender issue, some people are just crappy individuals who put themselves and their own needs before others, even if it means hurting others in the process.
As for why? She's selfish and was after attention. And unfortunately, she got it at the cost of misleading you.
Not all women are that way. Some of us are like open books, it's just finding that special woman.
Women have no secret super power to lead us on where we have no control over how far we let it go. We are each responsible for ourselves in the way that we determine what we want in a potential relationship. If she is not giving you what you want, then if you stay, you are leading yourself along. The only way you are going to turn this type of behavior around is to stop blaming women (or men) for things entirely in your control.
im so sorry this happened to you, but your strong and you'll make it. please just know, men and women both play. its not just one and not the other. it really doesn't matter if there a guy or a girl, if they play you and lead you on, they'll do it regardless. but just know, i heard this quote and it really helped me, "somtimes God removes people from our lives because he hear conversations we didnt" I hope that helps.
One thing I've learned people try to have backups for when they are not seeing somebody that's wrong for the person that really cares about that other person if you make a commitment to somebody you got to be honest what that other person cuz you know what is Fairlife to they're wasting their time
Usually if a guy is lead on it's because the guy let's the girl do it. How? You give her too much attention when she barely gives you any, yet you somehow are surprised when she led you on when you're clingy and when you don't let her chase you at all.
So she just likes the attention you give her when she doesn't even have to earn it.
It's because they have the instinct to find the best mate possible. Where men are able to say "ok this is the girl I chose and I'm going to dedicate to her" a lot of women are simply looking for the "best deal".
Some of them continue to do it even if they are living with you. Married to you or the mother of your child.
Sounds like she wanted attention and loved that you paid attention to her and basically made her feel good about herself. If you and the girl weren't boyfriend/girlfriend then she's free to see whoever she wants and just friends. It's good to have other girls that are friends in case that one girl you have your eye on, it doesn't work out at least you have other options.
Because some women think of men less than insects, they have a lot of men giving them attention daily and probably don't even give a second thought to those they suddenly stop talking to, don't ever fret over a woman until you're the only option she WANTS
It is not about gender, not all girls are like this like not all guys are nice, take this as a lesson and try not focus on only one girl till you find the right one, always have a backup plan this will sound mean and selfish to many readers but this is life and we have to protect ourselves. And you are 30 dont act like a teenager, turn your anger into self improvement and in no time you will see you dont need them they need you !
Peace bro !
Because it is in their nature.
Females are conniving and manipulative, she extracted emotional labour from you with no recompense.
Never trust a female
You must be living in a dream world if you think men don't do that to women as well.
get to know them, their personality before you give your heart out.
learn to read people. a lesson for many, both m/f
Men are equally as guilty of doing this. Can't judge ALL people based off a few bad ones. Sorry that happened, but you learned something from it.
here's a secret: women love attention just as much as men love sex.
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