Why do a lot of girls exhibit submissive behavior then deny it when called submissive?

Question

-Softly negotiate and accomodate to there boyfriend instead of asserting.
-Accomodate everyone.
-Like taller men
-Prefer male bosses to female bosses
-When boyfriend talks in assertive voice usually go with it
-Asks nicely for a male to stop being overprotective of them or "i can tak care of myself indepwndantlty" yet doing it ina submissive way and sometimes yielding to the guy jf he was rifht to be protective
-Protect there boyfriend from there dad when her dad js jusf bejng protextive
-Get mad at boyfriend for punching guy friend when he disrespected her a lot and the guy frjend does rhe same thing for her girlfriend
-Are understanding and accomodating when u do them wrong
-Complains when dude doesn't do the big thing
Feel free to disagree with any of these i listed

AmandaYVR · Accepted Answer

I sort of like your question, but with the poor grammar I have to admit, I don't entirely understand what you're saying or where you're trying to go with this.

Also, I wish you didn't anon it. A question specifically about submissive females really should not be anonymous. It's only restating the point that being submissive usually stems from insecurity, not standing up for what one believes - ultimately, not even knowing what they believe in. All people need to be able to withstand critique and criticism for their actions and their words. The point of a site like this (and conversations in general) is to vocalize some of your beliefs and ideas about the world, and bounce them off of others to check is your thinking is sound, and to make connections and have rewarding relationships with people. If you cannot do this, you will never fully form to a mature and evolved person.

Also, your title seems to suggest one thing, but down below as a reply you said you are a sub to your husband. So then I guess one can infer that you think being sub is not something to be ashamed of in any way, and you wish girls would stop hiding behind a denial that this is the path they choose.

You could be from a less developed or egalitarian nation, or be very religious, or have personal issues with being unable to assert yourself. It is your choice, your right. But my belief is that this indicates feelings of inadequacy or inferiority, and I cannot accept that for myself or those in my life. It is a waste of one's potential to surrender this level of agency over your own life.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I'm always dominant, not all girls are the same.
- I'm very assertive, my boyfriend obeys me.
- I never accommodate everyone.
- I like hot men, regardless of their height.
- I prefer fair bosses, regardless of their gender.
- I always talk in assertive voice and my boyfriend goes with it.
- I'm never yielding to the guy.
- My dad is not overprotective, he knows that I can take care of myself (I'm a martial artist).
- I'm usually the one who is punching other people for disrespecting me, my boyfriend is not aggressive.
- LoL, I'm not understanding and accommodating, especially when someone tries to do me wrong.
- I'm not sure what you mean by "big thing", but I rarely complain, because I'm always in charge ;)

Why do a lot of girls exhibit submissive behavior then deny it when called submissive?

SomeGuyCalledTom · Accepted Answer

I think it's a conflict between what they desire in evolutionary terms, and how they desire to be viewed by society. Women are attracted to powerful, confident men. But they also want to be seen as "equals", especially in a socio-economic and political sense. The problem is, sexual attraction relies on asymmetry (eg: powerful man ravishes the submissive woman). So when society tells women that those asymmetries must be cancelled out in order to have "progress", it creates a cognitive dissonance. I think women in BDSM community are actually the more progressive ones on this issue. Because they've learned to kind of compartmentalise these conflicting desires. They give labels and parameters to describe those asymmetries, and in doing so, they create a separate cognitive space in which those asymmetries can play out safely. They have "playrooms" where the man can indulge his desire for sexual domination over a submissive yet receptive female. And they have "safe words" to know when playtime is over. Then they leave that shared space and return to polite society, where no clear asymmetries exist on basis of one's gender.

sheikalana · Answer

When I was younger I thought that being submissive was a bad thing.

MiamiMadness · Answer

What's the big thing?

Iron_Man · Answer

It’s because probably they’re feminist

Why do a lot of girls exhibit submissive behavior then deny it when called submissive?

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