(Details below) Girl sends me private Snap of her in sports bra and leggings, captioned "liking the fit for the gym." Is she taking the initiative?

[RichieB1tchy]

So some important details:
-We've been flirting for about a month or so now. I'm 21M, she's 25F
-My cousin [F30] (our mutual friend) has said she doesn't want us to date, claiming she doesn't want to lose a friend. Cousin hasn't had a boyfriend in years, plays around with guys, wants a sidekick to go through it all with.
-Girl has told me I have pretty eyes, jokes with my parents and calls them her in-laws, sent me a picture of a bathing suit for her trip for my opinion, and now what the title says.
-She's established lots of physical contact, but some weeks she's all over me, some she doesn't seem very interested.
-Establishes serious physical contact, grabbing my hand, rubbing up against me, hugging me from behind, but then curls up on the couch with her butt towards me.
So while it's very obvious we're into each other, at least I think so, her physical signals are unclear and inconsistent and times. I think her sending me that Snap is sort of telling me she's going to go for me despite what her friend says. It's just every time I want to make a move, she's not as flirty as she usually is and I can't tell if I would make her uncomfortable. I'm very serious about her and she's said to a trusted mutual friend that I'm the "type of guy you marry, and take it slow with."

What's happening here, what do I do, and what is she trying to say?

Thanks!

[hahahmm]

What's going on is that there's probably 20+ other dudes trying to get with her and she sent the same pics to all of them to see what the reaction would be. You're the guy who is trying to figure out what it means. Some other guys reacted VERY differently than you. Like one guy jumped on her on day 1. Another guy on day 5. You're waiting till day 80+ or something. I'm not saying you have to get with her, just saying here's the news report, bro.

Checkout my MyTake on leadership.

[RichieB1tchy]

I've thought of that and I know she keeps them in her social media circle but complains they're all too shallow and said to a mutual confidant that she's "done looking for guys."

She's never private Snapped me before either so it's not a regular thing. And with all given details, it's confusing because her in-person flirty vibes are very cyclical. Some weeks she's all over me being very romantic, other weeks it's just mostly friendly.

[hahahmm]

From my pov you worry to much about what she's thinking. What she's thinking can change every 10 minutes. It's better for you to figure out who you are and what you want and to be 1000% certain about that. Then if a female fits into your plan, great. If not, you move on instantly, regardless of what she wants/thinks or how she looks. Life is simpler that way and you'll get way more of what you want too.

[RichieB1tchy]

I totally hear you. I got really hung up on a friend a couple years ago, thought we had it made and I misinterpreted every single thing. I decided a couple years ago I would stay local and not go for the career I wanted because the lady is so much more important to me. I thought this friend was ideal, but she wasn't. I moved on and this girl enters my life and I didn't think anything of. Everything about this is opposite my personal philosophies on dating, not in like a dangerous or reckless way, but like I would never be interested in a person I didn't know for at least a year or two. This girl and I have been hanging out for about 4 or 5 months. Just an example.

I definitely know what I want and need and she's much more ideal than the other girl, and not in a "check all the boxes" type way. I never go looking for trouble. If it finds me, then I can try my hand. So that's sort of where I am with this. She's also had several crappy boyfriends over the years and doesn't want to whore around like my cousin does, so I know if she's being serious about what she's saying she's probably not trying to play around. There was also a period where she dished out flirty hints and I didn't reciprocate at all. I only started once a family member said she thinks we'd be a good couple.

[hahahmm]

If you have time, read my MyTakes. May give you some ideas.

[Avicenna]

Your signals and reaction are also probably mixed, at best. She's trying to get you make a definitive move, to show some confidence. Stop trying to read her and make a move.

[RichieB1tchy]

That's what I'm thinking. It's tough because I don't know what my cousin has said to her and I don't want to do or say something she'd like but then end up taking crap from my cousin for it. My cousin has made no mention of this to me, so as far as our reality is concerned, she's not into me and it's not happening. I'm fairly certain she isn't being a total bitch to her but that's the only thing that's holding me back. This would definitely be serious if we got together and I don't want it to start as a game or seen as spite.

[Avicenna]

Your happiness matters more than the Machiavellian machinations of your cousin

[RichieB1tchy]

100% agree. My plan is to let my cousin know my intentions with this girl and then talk to the girl if things don't progress a different way.

[Avicenna]

You have the right idea- good luck!

[RichieB1tchy]

Thanks!

[Iron_Man]

Not necessarily some girls don’t take it any farther than the Internet and just want to get complemented For an ego boost and that’s it

[RichieB1tchy]

I hear you, but did you read any of the details I posted? I feel at this point it might be more on the nose. Unless you did and you still hold that opinion. As far as we're concerned, she's taken it farther than the internet. We see each other every weekend, and with those times, the flirty in-person vibes are cyclical.

[Iron_Man]

No I only read the headlines

[RichieB1tchy]

Ah okay. I'd love to hear your input with the details read, but if not it's okay.

[Iron_Man]

Ok Tag me later I’m busy working on the government project

[NoLookingAtSoleil]

She's older than you and cornering you into a relationship, you are too dumb to notice where it is going.

[taboomaster]

Take the hint Moron.

[RichieB1tchy]

Appreciate the brutal honesty. I'm a chronic overthinker and got really hurt by misinterpreting the "hints." So I'm in a weird place.

[taboomaster]

Yeah, fix it and ask her out. Or at least ask what her intentions are

[RichieB1tchy]

I definitely will soon. I figured it would be best when we're really feeling each other. When it's not as flirty it might seem forced I don't know.

[In_Trance]

Smh... duh...

[RichieB1tchy]

"Duh" as in the title answers my own question? Or something else?