Was I being a "pick me girl"?

[Anonymous]

SO I was in my religious knowledge class today, and my teacher asked how do friends influence other friends. I then said "Some girls may see their friends dressing a certain way and getting attention from boys and they may wanna do the same". Now that i think about was that me being a "pick me"?

Updates

+1 y

What I meant by a certain way I meant revealing.

[hi_it_is_me123]

Funny how some male gagers in the commentsection love pick me girls but hate simps. Pick me girls simply is a female beta simp with no selfrespect that say or do anything to get male attention. For example a woman just say misogynistic bs aka say things what some immature guys want to hear to get their attention. So she agrees to everything what the men say to get his attention. But dear guys such girls would not want average guys. I mostly see them act like this to get attention from so called badboys or wealthy/rich guys.
It is same as when a simp act like a feminist to get attention by women.
I even saw non conservative traditional women act like hardcore traditional conservative women to get the attention of their handsome conservative crushes... lool

[Datboi65]

You got something very wrong. The label "pick me" is being used against women who are actually married and giving advice to other women. I've seen it with my own 2 eyes, some of the most wonderful and most respectful women I've ever had the privilege of encountering have been labeled as "pick me" before. I'm not sure if you now Mrs. Shahrazad Ali. She's a scholar, a brilliant mind, and a leader of her community, and she used to preach the same thing for 3 decades, and even she was called a sellout and a pick me. Make that make sense. I don't think such a thing as a "beta female" exists, because men and women are different. Men need to act with confidence and masculinity, which is why as stupid as these ranks are, they do exist. For women? I don't really know if there's such a thing as "ranking femininity", but what I do know is that most Western women nowadays are far from being feminine. No, I'm not into conservative women either because they tend to be racist lol. Just someone who is religious/modest, but politically leans more towards libertarian/liberal would be fine (if that even exists nowadays).

[hi_it_is_me123]

No bs. Yes Pick me is overused but by definition it is the same as simps. If you dislike simps bit like pick me girls you are hypocrite

[hi_it_is_me123]

Just because "pick me" is misused does not mean the definition of it changed. Nice guys get called simps but the definition of simp is still remains. Your anecdotal experiences does not change this fact

[hi_it_is_me123]

I also saw men who get called simp just because they dont hate women

[hi_it_is_me123]

Yes beta women exist otherwise sexist badboys would not get any girl. These women are too passive with no selfrespect, otherwise they would not date men who disrespect them

[hi_it_is_me123]

I believe you that women get called pick me for no reason. It often gets overused/misused

[hi_it_is_me123]

@asker you are not pick me. You expressed your opinion. You are simply saying that some girls copy their friends to be like their friends. You did not slut-shame anyone. Girls your age are easily influenced. So girls can be influenced by their friends.

[hi_it_is_me123]

Young girls **

[Datboi65]

I don't know if you can read properly, but I never said anything about simps in my comment. I only gave context that men are to be ranked in that order, because they lead with confidence and masculinity, which makes sense to have a system of ranking. To put that into perspective, your definition of a quote-on-quote "alpha female" is a loud and confident woman, right? Except, plenty of men don't find that attractive at all. Men like passive women. That's a good quality. Believe it or not we really value our peace and quiet. You can be ladylike, and still not get taken advantage of, so that's another myth. Also, yes the word simp does get overused I agree there, but the two words cannot be compared in meaning, because in the grand scheme of things most of the time men hit the nail right on the head when they call a guy a simp, but women tend to come after traditional women when they call them a "pick me" girl. It's not anecdotal, because it's not statistically measurable, or else your argument can also be discounted on the basis of using anecdotal evidence. I would never defend a girl that promotes misogynistic behavior from men, but I can't help but notice that mostly it's feminists attacking women who warn men about these women, or promote traditionalism. To answer your question, I personally don't care about what simps do with their women, because I'm not the one getting disrespected at the end of the day, it's the other guy. I have very low tolerance for bs and disrespect from a woman, or anyone else for that matter. What you need to understand is that men value respect over love. Men need to be respected first, and loved second. There are 2 types of respect:

[Datboi65]

A) Basic: You give this to everyone by treating them with decency, like you yourself want to be treated.
B) Acquired: This is for those who have earned it. People in positions of authority, and there are certain privileges that come with that.

Now this what women don't understand. In a relationship, a man needs to show his woman type A) because she deserves to be treated right, but a woman should give the man both A) and B). Why? Because for a perfectly functional relationship, a woman needs to see the man respect a man's authority in the relationship, or else a divorce will happen very quickly. Masculine women don't make great wives, because they try to challenge men. If a man doesn't even give you type A) of respect, he ain't worth your time. If you don't give your man type A) and B), you need to re-evaluate yourself. He earns his right by being with you, or you would've rejected him if you cannot trust his leadership. I don't get why women get with guys, and then they just disrespect them like that. Anyway, had to explain some points properly on this one.

[hi_it_is_me123]

Rhen dont complain it when these passive women like badboys. You are not automatically loud just because you are not passive. Passive women tend to be the victims of toxic men since they are too passive to defend themself and stand for themself in my experience

[hi_it_is_me123]

So passive women are the prey of badboys/toxic men

[hi_it_is_me123]

Pick me is overused by immature minors.

[Datboi65]

Do you even read my comments? I said you can be passive/ladylike, and still have boundaries. Set a standard, and let people know when they are crossing the line. If he proceeds anyway, call the police. Women are not children, they can make decisions for themselves. They can spot danger, and they can avoid it. Being a lady doesn't mean you're helpless and cannot say no to a man, that's just bullshit. Funny how your strategy of protection from toxic men is to literally turn into one.

[hi_it_is_me123]

A passive woman may not/cannot defend themself since they avoid confrontation. Go fucking look up the definition of these words.
"A passive person seeks to avoid confrontation. Passive people may come across as easygoing, nonchalant, or shy."
I would not understand why you want such traits in an adult woman. Feminine woman does not need to be passive to be ladylike or feminine. Yes women ain't children and so why should an adult woman be a passive submissive person that listen to (or obey) his partner like kids who obey their parents.

[Datboi65]

Do you even understand basic language? YES, you can be both "passive" and "firm". All you did was give me the definition of a word I already knew the meaning of. No shit Sherlock. You don't have to be "confrontational" to set boundaries. You can yell for help, you can call the cops, you can do plenty of things. Believe it or not, there are plenty of dudes out there who are willing to swoop in and protect you from an aggressor. If a guy crosses your boundaries, he deserves to be put in jail. Most men out there will get the hint and just leave. Why push it with a woman who's not interested? If your strategy to attract men is to try and emasculate them, I feel sorry for the fool that's gonna marry you.

[hi_it_is_me123]

You are too stupid to get it. I am done with your stupidity. You want passive shy girls to not be shy and passsive when she is treated bad. This is not how it works idiot. Passive, shy, submissive etc. are personality traits. This person can't just stop being passive, shy when she get treated bad. Omg fuck off. I am done with you. I know plenty of shy, passive and submissive girls who could not manage to scream or say no to the guy since her shyness prevent her to do it. I am also a shy girl. I know how difficult it is to defend myself and fight for my rights.
And why would a man who crosses your bondaries, would respect you and leave you? If he respected you, he would not crosses your boundaries in the first place. What kind of retarted logic you have.
Since you insulted my potential partner, i loose every respect for you. Do not make it about my partner. I am not into incesure wanna be macho alpha idiot.

[hi_it_is_me123]

I know enough shy girls like me who even struggle to get help by police. It disgusts me when boys like you think being shy, passive etc is cute. You just like our weakness although it harms us. You dont know how much it harmed me. These traits also attract toxic guys in my experience too.

A feminine girls does not need to be shy, passive etc.

[hi_it_is_me123]

My friends sister was almost Kidnapped just because she can't even managed to scream no due to her extrem shyness. Fortunately someone saws it, and helped her.

[hi_it_is_me123]

The way you try to assume things about my dating life is the reason why i am rude to you now. I loose every respect for you. Even if you did not mean to call my potential partner fool, it is still disgusting since you try t. Whatever i dont want to continue this conversation

[hi_it_is_me123]

****

[Datboi65]

Men cannot control what they like. You said it yourself, someone saved her. Even when you're shy, the natural fight or flight response kicks in. I have stepped in many times, even in countries where I didn't speak the language of and I would see a random couple arguing in a foreign language, I would intervene. It's called common decency. Being shy doesn't stop you from calling for help, and not all women who aren't confrontational are shy either. If you want assertiveness classes, go ahead. However, when you start to lose male interest, don't come back and stay right where you are, the dominant bossy chick that likes to tell men what to do.

[Puppystarfish23]

I've been saying this for years on this site and I got hate too. I totally agree with what your saying. These guys call any male that agrees with anything that a female a simp on this site unless that girl is saying something misogynistic they all simp out themselves

[Datboi65]

@Puppystarfish23 Before we argue about use of words, let's establish a clear-cut definition on what both of them mean. A simp is a man who panders to women that aren't interested in him, so he can sleep with them, and is typically a beta male. A pick me girl is a girl that panders to men who have no interest in marrying her, with the intention of being wifed up by them. No that we got our definitions out of the way, if a man is a simp I don't care what they do with their time. If he wants to buy someone's onlyfans, I say let him. I'm not the person who will get screwed at the end. You for one seem to have a problem with the quote-on-quote "pick me" girl, when it doesn't affect your life. The reason I put it in quotation marks, is because sometimes these women don't even meet the definition of a pick me. I stated before, if a woman says something misogynistic, like men being superior or the such, I will call her out on pandering to misogynistic men. However, if she gives valid criticism about behavior of women nowadays and hook-up culture, that by no means make her a pick me girl. She will still get called out for being "pick me" even if she's married and outside of the dating market. Go figure.

[myabe123]

Ugh gen z says everything is pick me girl status. Just live your life, everyone will throw a label on you.

[Wraith_Cemetery]

Yep... Gen Z sure do love their labels

[Datboi65]

What nonsense are you talking about? Being labeled a quote-on-quote "pick me" girl is actually a good thing. It means you're a perfectly functional human. It means you reject 3rd wave feminism, and you are traditional and happen to think with logic and reasoning. That was a label that miserable single feminists in their 40s used back then and still use now against women that are married and happy in their marriage. My advice? Keep up the good energy.

[abc3643]

"religious knowledge"

LOL, I'm sorry but that is just too funny.
Religion and knowledge have nothing to do with each other.
If anything, knowledge kills religion in the long-run.

[Asker]

it is in my country.

[abc3643]

What is in your country? And what is your country?

[Wester1967]

Actually, from reading the FDS sub, they tend to call women who actively cater to what men say they want, that woman is a pickmeisha.


For example, guys say they want a skinny girlfriend, so a pick me will go to the gym. Guys say they want a woman who can cook well, so she takes cooking classes.


Its performative. In other words you have to DO it to be a pick me. If you’re just talking about it or describing it, you’re not pick me.

[nice-girl]

No, you just made an observation and answered a question. And it's true what you said.

[Anonymous]

If you’re not a feminist, you don’t reject all male standards, and you care about being attractive to a potential partner, you’re a “pick me” girl.

[Jamie05rhs]

No; you're fine. You just answered the question. And you were right.

[Ryfyle]

There is no clear definition on what this term means in correlation to simping.

[SofiSin667]

No, you just said it like it is.

[Anonymous]

No. Just remember to do research before you make your mind up on things like that.

[Anonymous]

Nothing wrong with being a pick me.
but to answer your question: No.

[MzAsh]

Is there anything wrong with men being a simp?

[Opinion Owner]

@MzAsh Absolutely not. If anything "simp's" and "pick me's" are one of the best recipes for mutual happy relationships. We live in a sick world today and the sickos stay on GAG while the rest goes out and does their thing.

[MzAsh]

I firmly disagree. These are people who sacrifice their own stuff respect for the validation of others. This is not good for relationships.

[MzAsh]

Self respect *

[Opinion Owner]

@MzAsh we're talking about different things here.
But the general rule applies for Relationships. If you're not willing to make your partner happy, then you shouldn't be in one. Simple as that. Simps and pick me girls do exactly that.

[MzAsh]

There’s a difference in adding to your partners happiness and being a simp or pick me.

[Opinion Owner]

@MzAsh these days they call you a simp or a pick me if you're making your partner happy or do something for them like a favor.

[MzAsh]

Some people might but is that what those terms really mean?

[Opinion Owner]

@MzAsh i would subscribe to that. They invented it and now they also throw it around at us. More haters means you're doing something right.

In my reality over here? Nobody uses these words. Literally nobody. I could say these 2 words and at first I'll be looked at as if I'm speaking a strangers language but it's best left unsaid and unseen. We don't need that crap booming over here.

[This_Is_My_Opinion8]

Did you said it to gain boys attention?

[Asker]

no, from an observation standpoint. and their wasn't any boys in their that "I liked'' xD!

[This_Is_My_Opinion8]

Then you were not a pick me girl.

[Wise4myage]

I guess it depends on what you were wearing, lol.

[Anonymous]

I don’t see the problem with it.

[Asker]

what I was meaning by a "certain way" was revealing like showing their butt and boobs (how explained it in class). was that a "pick me girl"?

[Opinion Owner]

I know. I don't see what's the problem with any of it.
I don't see it as a problem until girls are complaining that they should be able to wear whatever they want.

[RebeccaSJ]

Modest is hottest.