Why dont women like it when I am an asshole to them?

[Anonymous]

I see other guys able to get women while being a dick. But when I try to do that they get upset. I can only be nice or they don't talk to me.

[quaranta]

Being a d**k to attract women is a fine art that usually comes spontaneous to those who are naturally like that.
Probably you felt the need to set it up because you were playing it in a way that looked desperate/granted/clingy to them, and that doesn't work as well. But there is a lot of range between the 2 approaches, you don't have to go to extremes...
Anyway, let me tell you why "being a d**k" attracts women sometimes, because I think you're misunderstanding how it works. It's not about being rude, judgeful, selfish and vengeful. This is generally repulsive, especially if you didn't "get" them already.
Being a d**k is a natural result of being a person who is generally independent, busy, has lots of contacts and priorities. Being a person like this makes you successful in general in the life, giving little time/attention to women you flirt with. It translates to giving naturally slow replies, forgetting some messages, canceling some meetings, sending mixed signals and interacting with people who are potentially more interesting than them. This makes them think that you're desiderable, and also proven to be available enough, but not fully, so they have to work harder to get you. Of course you don't have to tell a girl "you're not enough" because this is the wrong way, it's forced and it looks more like if you have self esteem issues and are in competition with her, and that's kind of pathetic, instead of naturally implying she isn't doing enough yet to win priorities in what you give attention to in your busy life. Also, playing too obvious games like ghosting on purpose in a noticeable way or not replying when you are offended, looks unattractive as well (kind of desperate). The only real way is to become the most successful version of yourself in general, and that will make the rest more natural. Of course it takes time but it's a win-win afterall. Positive, charming but absent is a type of d**k that works much better than the others. The "bad treatment" has to stay in the absence/silences, not in the direct way you interact with them, which should be positive and chill instead.
Lastly, mind that not all the girls work the same. Guys with none/few experiences tend to generalize and expect to find a "method" that works for all the girls, but that just can't be it, by facts.
Instead of trying to find a global strategy and perfection it, you should go for the girls who are most naturally compatible to you (interests, hobbies, mentality) and so, easy to talk with, without any need to set up these games that don't even reflect yourself, probably. Of course you can also find a girl who is specifically attracted to psychological abuse but this is a very bad premise for a toxic relationship...

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Maybe because not all women like assholes or guys acting like dicks.. Have a dick, don't be a dick..

[MysteriousDarkness]

The typical jerk is a perceived as a mean-spirited, self-serving individual who thinks and acts as though everyone else in the world can only be understood—and whose only importance is defined—in terms of their relationship to her- or herself. But this does not get at the ways that the dick's behavior, although it looks and feels offensive, it is actually acting as a psychological defense that blocks awareness of more vulnerable feelings like insecurity, fear and hurt.

Dickish behavior is an adaption that works initially as a coping mechanism to decrease one's awareness of living in what otherwise feels like a hostile environment. From this environment, the budding dick comes to "trust" that she or he can count on others to hurt, exploit and disappoint. This trust works to establish a sense of self-sufficiency where the dick believes that she or he can count on—and therefore needs—no one. For the dick, a sense of chronic injustice rationalizes offensive/defensive behavior that separates her- or himself from a world that feels—usually from early in one's life—unsafe.

[N192K001]

It seems that women who are attracted to that… have problems, and require enough pain & abuse to make realize the stupidity of their behavior. Do you really want involvement in any of this: defective, hard-to-predict interactions that often go wrong & you actually imposing this pain & abuse? Avoid unnecessary headache & heartache, and aim for better people.

As mentioned by others, women generally detect pretending with significantly-high accuracy-levels.

[TheArbiter]

In my experience- it's not merely a means of "being an asshole"- whenever you see two people interact; especially people who are in a relationship, you're only ever really seeing such a small fraction of how they interact, the tip of an iceberg, everything you think about how others are is doomed to bias because you won't ever really have the full picture- and it seems like you're prone to assuming the worst in others, just a guess, perhaps out of bitterness- my advice; insulting women won't work, playful teasing once a rapport is established often keeps them interested- again maybe little jesting can appear to outsiders as being an asshole, you gotta know her though first, bro.

[boggboss]

Because they are already invested in the person before they start to act shitty just being a asshole to women won't make them like u

[slatyb]

The problem is that you are socially clueless. Human courtship is much more complicated than just saying some magic thing at the right time. See a counselor for some coaching on dating.

[FilmGuy93]

You probably don't have any charisma. You probably just come across mean spirited.

[VikingWarLord]

This is a WEST problem
just get your passport and go overseas.
You'll get hotter women without the attitude.
It seems paradoxical but true.

[D_Bone_Steak]

You gotta get buff first and then you can do what you want.

[EnglishEuropean]

It's because you're not really an asshole, you're just pretending to be one. Girls see right through that bs.

[Freyke]

Don't actually be an asshole. Be cheeky, playful with her. If you follow the description of 'asshole' in the dictionary, you will fail.

[LimitedBenefits101]

Most women LOVE being abused if you are CHAD
but if you are BOB they will call the cops on you

But then again most women are like children they dont know what's good for them.

[Twalli]

So be nice to them. It's the right thing to do. Treat them like actual people, not a cum dump.

[rabbitzzz]

They are close enough to be an asshole. Doesn't work on strangers I think.

[Anonymous]

You have to be tall and hot also.

[Asker]

I'm 6 foot. And I get girls. Just I can't be a dick.

[dudeinohio]

There are actually a few that don't like it.

[Guy13]

🙄 🙄🙄🙄

[Guy13]

Maybe because you’re a dumb one🤷🏻‍♂️