My crush rarely texts me first, am I just overthinking this or is she really not interested?

[YukiPook]

So basically, my crush rarely texts me first. She has been doing it a bit more often however, but not a lot still. I first met her in class, and we've talked a bit during those times, but recently I asked for her Instagram and we've been talking for a month and few weeks at this point, and that's where we're at rn. I'm mostly the one initiating the conversation most of the time. But whenever I do message her, the conversation goes great and lasts for a while, usually around an hour or more, we say good night to each other when the conversation lasts until late night and all that. She does seem genuinely interested, and if anything she asks me more questions than I ask her. We have a lot of things in common, and we talk about our interests a lot. So, why does she rarely ever text me first to initiate the conversation? Could it just be that she's already used to me starting it? Maybe she's just being nice and isn't really interested? I dunno, I'm probably overthinking this a lot but I'd like to hear someone's opinion.

[surprisedjo]

Hello, I can relate to the girl you're talking to as I never initiate conversations. Personally, I do this so that I can see whether the guy is interested (clearly you are since you are starting the convos). However, she may just see you as a friend? Imagine viewing the conversation from a third person's pov, would it look like a chat with just two platonic friends? If so, perhaps you could see if there is any interesting events/movies that have come up and ask if she would like to do something. As I've been in this position before, the conversations just started getting dryer and dryer until we stopped talking. So do something!!! (ask her out).

[YukiPook]

Thank you for your response! I guess from a third-person like view, it does seem like that sorta? We tease each other a lot but aside from that I suppose it could seem like we're just friends. My next goal was to actually ask her to hang out somewhere since we never have but that's a bit hard due to my social anxiety, but may I ask another question? Do you think there's a point where its too early to ask a crush if they want to hang out? We never hung out at school, and my overthinking ass keeps thinking it's way too early to hang out as we've only been messaging for a few weeks like I said, so I don't know? I'm conflicted af

[surprisedjo]

Honestly, if you really like a person why wait - I do however understand the social anxiety aspect but, you may lose something that could be special. Personally, I think that a few weeks is a perfectly normal time-range for people to ask each other out (ugh, I wish my crush would've asked me out by now). I mean, there have been people who straight up asked someone out on the spot after knowing them for a few hours. You've got to keep in mind that she might (or not, people vary of course :)) lose interest eventually, so you should really try this out if you're keen! Have you at least spoken at school? I find that if people message online, and see each other yet not talk, it's kinda a bad sign, & could mean that she isn't interested. If you ask her out, this could be an opportunity for you to both have one-on-one conversations to see if this could go further than just messaging.

[YukiPook]

Yeah, we have talked a bit during class, but never after. Granted it was during Period 6 which was our last class before school ended, so eh. She actually initiated the conversations more during that time, actually. So maybe she likes to initiate more face to face? I'm not sure, but I'll take what you said into consideration! I just have to push myself to ask her if she wants to hang out, I mean I already got this far with her so this will be one of the final stretches for me yknow? Seriously though thanks for your responses, seeing them actually made me feel just a little less conflicted and worried about asking her, so thanks! Hope it goes good with your crush eventually as well

[surprisedjo]

No worries, and thanks Yuki :)

[abbypaul]

nah she probably likes you its just scary to text first

[Guy13]

Dude, you are supposed to lead. How the date Vibe…the rest of relational aspects. Does she participate positively?

[Avicenna]

It might just be her communication style.

[Justneedtokno]

Nope we’re in the same boat

[TexasRed95]

I would assume not interested.

[Iron_Man]

Talk to her and see what’s happening

[rachel776]

we don't text first