In my experience most women are not used to being rejected unless they are very average to below average looking and continually go after guys out of their league.
Also women don’t approach men not nearly as much as vice versa. So just numerically speaking they get rejected less because most of them don’t even have to take the risk in the first place
Anyway I have had to turn down a few women in my life. It wasn’t comfortable because I know how exactly it feels being in the reverse position. I did not get a “power trip” out of it. No. But regardless of that I’ve had women do to me what was done to you plus:
1) have them get angry and labeled me “gay”. This is huge double standard bullshit. No man would get away with calling a woman a lesbian if he got turned down.
2) throw hissy fits and try to say “oh I don’t deserve them”
3) one ex girlfriend seriously threatened to kill herself when I carefully and tactfully broke up with her.
4) (worst incident). Woman utter a veiled threat about “hate to see something happen to your place” after she aggressively came on to me in my own room (uninvited). We were just acquaintances and she was friends with my flatmate.
Now of course I know that not all women handle rejection like that. But society seriously gives them a lot more leeway to behave unacceptably in those scenarios. This is something you will never see modern feminists own more to.
Women don't like rejection either. I was asked out by a girl when I was younger (I still feel bad about how badly I handled it). I didn't say no. But I never said yes. And that is the worst place to be. Because it's a rejection, but not a clear one. And for the next 6 months or so she'd bring it up around other people by saying " I asked him our and he said noooooo". Like I was going to change my mind. In hindsight I now know she was doing it because maybe partly I'd change my mind. But probably mostly if I changed my mind it would save her pride. Rejection sucks! Because when you put a your chips on someone saying "yes" and when they say "no", you don't get to take it back.
Honey, rejection isn't an only male experience. You guys don't know that women can and get rejected to? Lol Her response is just like anyone else, we've all dealt with some form of rejection and depending on the person sometimes we handle it well and sometimes we handle it poorly. It really just depends. Experiencing rejection isn't a man or woman only thing, it's a people thing. I've been rejected before in a romantic and platonic setting. It happens.
Usually that type of reaction is a defense mechanisms cause the person has been hurt by that person's emotional or physical denied access to them. To boost themselves up again, they just say that person didn't deserve them or their time. Both men and women have said this.
It doesn't have to be a gender thing, people in general just don't like rejection. as social creatures, we all want to be loved and accepted by one another cause human contact is important. Animals are the exact same way.
No, it's not normal at all! What a strange person. Sounds like she has a very high opinion of herself and doesn't respect other peoples' boundaries. Definitely better to be single than to be with this type of person.
I always think rejection is possible, though I don't actively approach guys anymore. It never led to good results in the past, instead, now I just make it very obvious that I'm interested and see what happens. In the past, when I used to approach guys, I got my fair share of rejection but that's part of the whole dating game when you take the "pursuer" role, I guess.
Opinion
31Opinion
No women expects to be rejected. In fact with how we all go through high school, females learn that guys are just after one thing, and that is sex. Now in our 20s we are not much different but all guys are not just after sex, and some rather a quality relationship rather than a sex partner. But, females will never expect it and just assume the guy just wants sex. And when a guy rejects her it really kills her sence of self and so much Infact some start thinking that they are so ugly because he doesn't like her.
Most very attractive women don't expect to be rejected. But your every day lady knows it can happen to her, and even they can be somewhat puzzled when it does happen. I think most women deep down believe that sex or a date with a guy will always be available to them, and if it doesn't happen like that then they get upset.
I am a woman I will speak for myself and for a few friends who approached men in the past.
Yes we know that a man may recject us.
No girls do not usually act like the girl who approached you.
The only girls in my experience who have acted like this are usually very self absorbed, never have had a man reject them, or thought you were interested in them and became appalled by being wrong and rejected.
From experience, generally women do not handle rejection. Like, at all.
Your see, there's a little button on their heart labeled "feelings" and when you reject them, you effectively put on brass knuckles and punch that button as hard as you can.
The results vary, but symptoms commonly include, falling flat, twitching and foaming at the mouth.
I mean she’s a bit weird to get upset and say you don’t deserve her after you repeatedly rejected all advances. She doesn’t deserve you as she isn’t taking what you say on board or consider your feelings. Like a guy calling a female a lesbian because she doesn’t want to date him, it’s weird
She has insecurities for whatever reason. Which is how men get the same label. It’s just that though. Being insecure.
I used to go to the mall and approach the girls working the kiosks. Never did get a number. I've been rejected probably 200 times now. I don't even care anymore. Most girls are nice about it too. It's the ones that don't say anything and just Shake their head that kind of upset me. It's like damn I'm that bad huh?
dude this is a very common behavior in women. of course women do not expect to be rejected!
unlike men women nowadays are not used to being rejected thanks to how low standard most men are and doing everything just to get pussy points and be in a relationship. also she must be hot, cause talking from experience the hotter the chick is the more bruised she will be from your rejection
Lol this reminds me of a speed dating event I went to years ago. After the event one of the girls came up to me at the bar and said "so are you going to buy me a drink?" I looked over at her (she's totally drunk like every other guy here as already got her a drink). I looked over and said "no I feel like you've had more then a few offers tonight". She went stormed off and I overheard her batching about me to another guy (totally drunk).
So obviously we're all different.
I don't expect anything. I can definitely see myself feeling a bit sad if I was though.
She probably said that to make herself feel better. I see a lot of guys doing that as well.
As a woman, I always presume a guy will reject or friendzone me until proven otherwise.
Women DO get rejected. Some of us more than others. It just means a guy isn't attracted to me: it sucks, but I go on with life.
Lol bonita see i really wanna see you and get to know you can we be at least net buddies it's been over a year now 🤣🤣🤣
@Aakash_Hangargi I'm going to give you points for persistence!
@Cynicaldreamer You can't be THAT bad looking.
I want to unravel the Mystery that is a cynical dreamer
Well i am no time cruise either 🤣🤣🤣
Tom cruise*
@ManOnFire Ooh... yes I am. When I say guys do NOT approach or talk to me outside of pure friendship, I'm serious. Not looking for pity, attention, or anything else; just stating a fact.
Trust me, if I was okay looking, or average at best, don't you find it odd guys have rarely, if ever approached or asked me out in real life?
Be honest, if a woman told you that men never ask her out, call her attractive, or when she tries to ask a guy out, she gets rejected, what do you assume about her?
@Aakash_Hangargi Pfft, I'm sure you look fine...
I just assume everyone looks like their avatar or profile picture online; I don't really think about what people look on here tbh
@Cynicaldreamer I might assume she says it to try to satisfy guys so they won’t think she can be taken by anyone else. Not saying that's your case, just what might be for other women.
Lol so you think i look like Moon oh my god you made my day 😍 thank you 😸😂
Yes especially when so many men kiss their asses
the 11th man theory is proof of this
https://curvingedge.wordpress.com/2009/08/04/11th-man-theory/
Nope, rejection is fine and even better than being lied to or lead on or whatever, the person is being honest and not wasting my time
Thanks 🙏🏼
Uhm sure!
Yeah, some do that rate themselves highly and also because society likes to paint a picture of men not being particularly discerning and women being the ones with all the dating power.
It seems like it.. All the girls who hit on me sounded really.. really confident.. and some of them used their friends to make fun of me or other guys to make me feel jealous when I turned them down...
I think she wanted for you to be interested in her so she could reject you and she would feel better about herself.
But you rejected her so she had to lash out.
She might be a bit coo coo for coco puffs.
No. Only entitled people do.
The one time that any girl has come clean to me, I rejected her and she took it pretty well. It really depends on their level of maturity.
Lmao that behavior is brutally normal in women. They have absolutely no ability to handle rejection.
If that was true, dont you think more women would be approaching guys?
Actually women fear rejection more than men do. Men are scared of it too. But we are learn to get used to it. Most of us know if we don’t approach women then chances are very little or nothing would happen.
@katestar you are definitely not speaking for all women.
I think women are just used to not having to ask guys out. They only do it when they want to, whereas guys are pressured to make the first move constantly.
We are pressured and most of us will stay lonely if we don’t make a move.
@haha456 most men aren’t naturally “bolder” than women when it comes to this. The ones you notice are but trust me most guys don’t “enjoy” approaching women. Especially nowadays. Rather we do it because we have to.
I asked out an attractive young woman that I took a liking to at my local CrossFit gym a few months ago. It was a calculated risk. We had several friendly chats earlier. I enjoyed that but I also knew it was important for her to feel comfortable around me.
One day I gathered up my courage and asked her to get breakfast (which is very low pressure date idea). She smiled but said she had a boyfriend (she never mentioned him earlier). That didn’t surprise me given she was young, attractive and friendly. I said “oh I respect. It’s alright. Don’t worry I won’t ask again.”
But now I have to still see her in class occasionally. We don’t get in conversations anymore but it’s surface polite. It’s awkward though which sucks. However I don’t regret asking her out because 1) I know her status now 2) she knows where I stand. If something changes for her in the future and I’m still single there’s a remote possibility she might be open to hanging out.
But again of that wasn’t easy for me. Not only did I worry about how she would react (fortunately she handled it well) but she’s also friends with other members and it’s a small community. And I know how women like to chit chat (and sometimes bicker) among each other about guys.
@globetrotter22
the fact that you managed to gather up your courage to talk to her shows that you have some type of courage. What you don't understand is that there are many women out there who can't even do just that.
Men are typically bolder and more desperate for sex. This explains why men approach more than women.
Being sensitive, timid, and shy are feminine qualities , not masculine qualities.
Men are designed to want to lead, be dominant, start things, build things, be goal oriented. Women are designed to enjoy things in the moment than chasing goals, want to be led, feel things more deeply and sensually, more into absorbing vibes from their surroundings, more likely to be influenced by the feelings of others.
Women are significantly more sensitive than men. This can also explain why women find it more difficult to approach.
@globetrotter22
Men and women are not designed the same way. They're both different.
But another reality is, if you only approach girls that are young, attractive, socially skilled, there is a good chance that they will be taken. Maybe if you really really want someone, you should cast a wider net than just chasing young hot chicks.
@haha456 alright if you believe all that above you better not be a feminist. Also you better be able to acknowledge that modern feminism (example the #metoo phenomenon) is really screwing up and confusing men on a lot of different levels. That’s a rabbit hole debate but I just want you to acknowledge that. I’ve seen some women act like huge hypocrites when it comes to all of this. Their all pro feminism when it comes to all the benefits but all of the sudden conveniently act traditional when it comes to responsibilities and risk taking. Not assuming you are like that but I just wanted to point that out.
And speaking of assumptions thanks a lot (sarcasm) for just assuming I only chase young attractive women. I actually have approached women close to my age and have set up dates. Oddly some of the worst dates I’ve been on are ironically with women closer to my own age. That’s also another rabbit hole discussion but the point I’m trying to make is I will approach when I think there might be an opportunity.
@globetrotter22
I dont think recognizing the differences between feminity and masculinity means I am a feminist. Two different words with very two different definitions.
I think its just that you're a very bitter person who enjoys projecting your own frustrations in life by blaming others.
@haha456 i didn’t start this conversation by being combative. Look at my original comments. Was I labeling any one or making personal attacks? No you started making a bunch of erroneous judgments about me just because you didn’t like the fact I talked about my experience of politely approaching a younger woman I met in person.
What’s even more incredible is that experience wasn’t negative at all. She wasn’t upset with me nor was I upset with her. We respected each other. Neither one of us did anything wrong. So what’s the issue? And yet you somehow twisted that into some sort of grandiose assumption about my character and personality with very little context.
If anything I think one of us is guilty projecting bitterness and it isn’t me. I didn’t start commenting on this thread looking for a fight and to act condescending to other people.
@haha456 i actually agree with your explanation of masculinity vs. feminine qualities. But just for shits and giggles is being “timid, shy, sensitive” even considered a “quality” in anyone man or woman? It’s easy to be that way. Being assertive and courageous requires you to persevere above your fears/doubts. All men (except psychopaths) feel fear/doubt but we are expected to “man up” and push past that anyway. I’m capable of doing that and have done that and will continue to do that. However that’s more easier said than done then most women will ever realize. A lot of anger you see coming from men is we often feel that women don’t RESPECT the position we are in. They think it comes naturally and it doesn’t.
Anyway you set me off a bit with the ”’maybe if you really really want someone, you should cast a wider net than just chasing young hot chicks.”
First off I do not “chase” younger hot chics 24/7. Being older I know damn well I can’t pursue them the same way I did at 25. With that said I do occasionally come across opportunities. I’ve been in a few age gap relationships in the past. Also I usually talk to them first for a while (like the CF girl) to gauge their interest/body language. If I do decide to drop a hint it’s never say/do anything inappropriate. I just asked this girl to get breakfast once for Pete sakes. Not like I asked her to come over to my house later that evening.
Ironically I did go to CF class today (after commenting on this thread) and guess who was the only other person there besides the coach? I haven’t seen her in over a month but she was very really friendly/pleasant and me likewise. That doesn’t mean I think she’s having second thoughts. But she was respectful and that goes a long way. She knew it took me courage to ask her on a date.
@globetrotter22
Being bold and brave is part of being masculine. Even if men can be shy and timid too. Men have more of an innate capability of being brave than women. why do you think historically men start and fight wars? Because being bold and determined is a masculine quality. It does not matter how much you don't like these facts, it will remain true.
if you've cast a huge net for many many years and you still are without success, maybe its time to just give up. Many of these older folks like you who are still single nearing their 40s tend to always blame others for themselves being single. But have you taken a look at yourself? maybe your standards are too high, maybe there is something innately wrong with you rather than other people.
And plus, I really don't need your passive aggressiveness. ok? Its completely unwarranted and I dont know why you're so pissed off.
@haha456 ah I have been in a few relationships in the last few years. The last one ended two years ago but that’s life.
But as for your cunt comments i. e. “oh your getting too old” and “maybe you should give up”. Nice try but I’m not falling for it. I’m guessing that YOU are the miserable one (probably a fat girl) and the only way you feel better was by saying that above.
And don’t gaslight me with that “passive/aggressive” bullshit. That presumptuous and your not fooling me. Happy people don’t talk to people that way. Seriously get a life.
@globetrotter22
I still don't know why you're so angry. Maybe if you had more luck with women, you would be nicer.
And yea.. I don't think you're young. This is coming from someone in her 20s. Give it a quick few more years and you will be 40. Its very odd how you think you're entitled to being young forever. Most guys your age are already married, engaged or have kids.
@haha456 also about the age attacks. You’re not exactly a spring chicken yourself by the way. 30 isn’t old but isn’t young 21 year old young either. Especially if your a woman.
I’m guessing you might of had a few bad incidents where the guy you liked gave more attention to a younger/prettier counterpart and it left you frustrated/depressed. Than I brought up my story how I like a younger woman I met and it reminded you of that. That’s why you started with throwing slights.
Didn’t have to be that way. You don’t know me from Adam. Everything could of been respectful on original topic. But instead you picked a fight. Don’t be that way because no one is going to “win”. It’s not worth the sugar high drama.
@globetrotter22
@globetrotter22I
I'm not 30. Does ignoring that fact that I am still in my 20s make you feel better about being old and single?
[I’m guessing you might of had a few bad incidents where the guy you liked gave more attention to a younger/prettier counterpart and it left you frustrated/depressed. Than I brought up my story how I like a younger woman I met and it reminded you of that. That’s why you started with throwing slights.]
you're gonna hit the wall in just 4 years, you better rethink about how much longer you will still have these hot young women going for you.
I don't think anyone expects to be rejected. You go into a relationship with an open mind, hoping it will work out, but you never know.
Lol typical some women think if they want you then you must want her, nope man I stay curving chick's all the time I can't deal with unintelligent women who are dim.
She's definitely being weird about this. No means, how hard is that?
@katestar the guy told her he wasn't interested. Why is she desperate?
@katestar and you did not take a hint
@katestar the fact that he said no. Actual no.
@katestar look Kate, I'm not saying if you ask one of your cute friends out and they reject you that you should hold that against them and cut them off. I'm saying there's a brand new guy that you liked and he's clearly not interested, and you lamely offer friendship.
@katestar okedoke x
I do expect to be rejected because I'm not most people's types
Well don’t assume the worst but at the same time be ready to handle getting a response you don’t want.
@Ryfyle I'm still not a guy though
@Still-alive can vouch for me
@Ryfyle can confirm she's a girl
Yeh!
Your rejection was something she couldn't handle
Indeed it's programmed into them that guys won't reject them and that they have all the power, surprises them when a guy does reject them because it goes against the guidelines they know
She's just an attention-whore, no reason to worry about stupid girls like her. She's the definition of a femcel (female incel).
Unless a bitch is a 2 trying trying to get with a guy who is a 10, they cannot fathom being rejected. Their brains simply are not wired to accept it.
Not many women even have the balls to ask people out. I think a lot of women stay virgins or single for long periods because they never have the courage to ask the guy out.
Im confused. So its a womans fault for not getting a guy because she doesn't have the courage to ask a guy out? Is this what the worlds come to?
@mobiusforniner women find men easily because they make themselves easily available or attract men by wearing sexy clothing. Men will naturally talk to them. It doesn’t work that way for men unless the men are just extremely attractive or have lots of money/success.
I've been there. My guy friend turned me down. I've told him that I like him. And he turned me down.
Maybe that is what majority of them think but guys are human so they can make decisions for them self
You dont deserve her attention but tries very hard to get taken out.
Impeccable logic
I know not every man is going to like or want me
I think it's more normal now even though it's not truly normal. At least she revealed that behavior at the very beginning. She actually did you a favor.
And when these weird girls get rejected, then they call us gay 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Those crazy women!
I think they expect it to be done more nicely
I’ve been rejected and that’s ok.
I think most girls don't expect to get rejected.
Women do not deal well with rejection.
Walk away from the insanity!
Inflated sense of self worth
Women expect to be paid.
I get rejected a lot so lol
No, they don't.
Pretty much.
can't generalize
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