What to do after all it?

[Anonymous]

3 years online

entertaining older dudes"potential sugar daddys"

and like more then 280 dude with who I had se*t calls and video

after all this, empty and miserable

lost innocence

I made my life in the most shitty way possible... affecting all other side of life

my mental health is crashed by all it

excuses are there

but self control was also a problem
so I should blame myself, mainly.

I don't know what to feel and think about all it and me

I don't know if a normal guy will want me something serious

and I don't know if ever to say it to a guy

I don't know what he will think and feel

[Jakey29]

Healing as a gentleman before me suggested aptly. You must amassed lots of money, time to spend it on good use. Mental therapy, meditation sound a good first step. Its never too late in life dear, seize whatever you have left.

[Asker]

I understand and appreciate.. thank you for answer
But I don't think the emptiness, misery and frustration will not disappear, after it, even will do... and it's like I want this never to happen before.. me never have done it

[Jamie05rhs]

The first step to healing is honesty. It sounds to me like you are taking that step. I'm proud of you.

[Asker]

Thank you, but miserable , dirty person with mind and soul... that's not a title of what I should be proud

[Jamie05rhs]

@n8765 That is your former self. You are turning the corner and stepping into a new and better future!

[Wiredone]

Don't say anything about your past unless they ask. Put your past behind you and live for the future

[Asker]

But this described me... I can't pretend to be a nun or innocent... but all is that , that secret life online