Why do women blame toxic masculinity when they are the ones who reward it and condemn men being open with their emotions?

[Deserter]

Women will tell guys to be emotional and cry, but if you do she'll lose sexual desire. They go for bad boys, not simps

[Pegases]

Truth is, most women don't realize that the reason men are reluctant to express emotion is because seldom are our emotions received well by society. Most women want a man to be open with his emotions, but in most cases they can't handle it, and end up responding in ways that reinforces why its better to keep them to ourselves. Women love to blame men for our lack of emotional openness, and while it's important for a man to have healthy outlets for his emotions, I dont fault men for choosing the peace that comes from keeping your emotions to yourself. Also, in this day and age men are blamed for everything, so don't let it get to you.

[Deserter]

Ik, it'd be nice to just open up to your SO about everything. Connection is nice

[Pegases]

It's a tough pill to swallow, I know, I've been there too. But the reality is, women can't help but lose attraction for men that show too much emotion. It's just the way it is. So as a man, you've gotta have a good support system of female and male friends, family, and especially a good therapist to express your human emotions to.

[PatriceONeal]

That's what friends are for, open up to your male friends who can relate with you better. Women are supposed to be "help-mates" for us. Not "best friends".

[Anonymous]

It's complicated. It's true that society disingenuously tells men they should be more emotional or that they lack emotional intelligence because they don't show their emotions, but then penalizes them when they are emotional. Most (?) women who love a man would not judge him for showing his emotions to some degree with her, but I think it does make some women uncomfortable. But if a man shows emotions in some ways early in a relationship, I do think they often get judged for it. And if men showed emotions publicly the way women can, they would be looked down upon by many people, both women and other men. I'm not saying any of that is right, but I do believe it's the reality men face.

I hate saying this but I think it's unfair in a way for people to encourage men to be more emotional because it sets them up for failure.

[Deserter]

I get showing too much emotion early on being a red flag tbf. Shows that the person is needy or has other problems to work out

[kylee2437]

There’s women that don’t do this but I get where you are coming from. I had to call out my friend the other day for basically saying that her boyfriend should get over the fact that he feels overwhelmed about having a first child coming in 2 months. I had to tell her like why is it an issue for him to be overwhelmed? It’s a normal feeling especially never having a child before

[Deserter]

My mom once was talking shit about her then boyfriend on the phone to a friend cause he was crying after his grandma died and he asked her to hold him. It was cringy yeah but still. I see this stuff happen with women

[kylee2437]

I think a lot of women do it without realizing tbh

[TsmGai]

You basically answered your own question, minus the simp part. Women like strong men. To them, being emotional implies weakness. Even though having a flaw doesn't negate your strengths. It's misandry.

[Justneedtokno]

I look the examples include telling boys to “man up” when they feel upset or justifying abusive and inappropriate behavior with the phrase “boys will be boys.” Toxic masculinity can be defined as “the need to aggressively compete and dominate others and encompasses the most problematic proclivities in men.

personally, I wouldn’t condemn a man for expressing himself I think, growing up we were always taught as women we had emotions and we were taught how to understand them and why. Growing up I think my father was more nurturing than my mother was sometimes.

Men are just a mystery

[cheetocandle]

Women do not tell men to be emotional and cry. Feminist women who have hair under their arms do. Don't get it twisted young man. Go cry to your therapist not me.

[Deserter]

You'll be the one crying after I punch you square in the coochie

[cheetocandle]

Excuse me? The threat of violence is unnecessary.

[Deserter]

You want it

[cheetocandle]

Were you abused as a boy? You were weren't you. Was it exciting for you? It was wasn't it.

[Deserter]

Go ahead, stomp on me with your stinky feet

[Anonymous]

Maybe some do but I am quite sure the majority of women dont. Its mainly a thing men seem to tell other men.

[Opinion Owner]

Why would we condemn men with beeing open with their emotions that would make no sense. We want you to show it and not be that unemotional thing some of you strive to be.

[kylee2437]

I think many women do it without realizing tbh. My friend did it the other day but also says mens feelings do matter

[Opinion Owner]

@kylee2437 Than these women are weird but I dont think that that many are really doing it. I mainly here it from men that say we can't show emotions or that they appear weak, much more than women saying they dont like men showing emotions.

[Deserter]

It's mostly women, believe me, men would rather just be nice

[Pegases]

How do you say it's mostly a thing men say to other men while also trying to prove that women take the emotions of a man seriously? You literally just completely disregarded the experiences of men. Do you date women? The irony

[Opinion Owner]

@Pegases I am a women and I have female friends and I know they care about their friends emotions. I said its a thing men say to men, because I only ever hear it online that men complain about not beeing able to show emotions and on the other hand women who talk about men not showing emotions and telling how other men look weak because they show emotions. Showing emotions isn't a form of weakness but I hear men saying it.

[Deserter]

Men support eachother. Women support men too. There's a difference when you get into a romantic relationship with a woman though. It turns her off

[Opinion Owner]

Most of the time it doesn't no. Why would I have a partner that never shows his emotional side? That would be so weird.

[PatriceONeal]

Don't listen to women. Problem solved.