Why don't girls approach a handsome guy?

Question

AmyHew1tt · Accepted Answer

I'd have trouble approaching an average guy, as I'm still working on my social anxiety. But the main reasons would be fear of rejection or looking desperate, and the presumption that if I find him attractive, many other girls will too, and he'll know that, so I always worry he wouldn't actually want to have a relationship.

I also don't know how to objectively judge myself on the looks rating, so I don't want to ask out a guy who might be out of my league. But nonetheless, I'm always friendly and smile at everyone. And I suppose it must be lonely for some of those guys who are just assumed to be playboys because they're handsome when a few of them might just want genuine attention as much as anyone.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Because then if (  he don’t want you) . It’s like; you’re the laughing stock. You’re the joke. Jokes on you.  You’re gonna look like yet another girl who wants this guy. Except you’re got rejected. And then you just look like the ugly girl who also wants the hot guy. 🤡 . All his hot Exes are gonna laugh at you. 🤡

hahahmm · Accepted Answer

Decide if you want to be a traditional guy or a non-traditional guy. If you want to be a traditional guy then 1.) You need to put effort into making the first move / taking the first risk, 2.) 99% of women want traditional benefits from guys, even if she herself doesn't want to be traditional at all. 3.) If you're traditional don't waste time on females who don't want to be traditional... it's not worth it.

Oh, wait.. you thought being a guy means you can just sit back and everything you want in life comes to you? Doesn't work like that. Although, guys who live in places where the women far outnumber the guys have an easier time.

Pegases · Accepted Answer

They don't have to. The burden of approach is on the man, especially if you want a feminine woman. That being said, in most cases the women that approach men, have far more experience with men.. Women are known players too now, and the women approaching unsuspecting men, in most cases are going to manipulate your emotions via sex appeal or straight up sex. Don't allow approach anxiety to stifle your options. You want to be the kind of man that gets to choose the woman he wants, not the man that only chooses from what he has available.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Sometimes they do. Approaching takes lot more confidence than most women have.

Anonymous · Answer

I would say they are either scared of rejection or are shy. I used to do the whole eye contact, smile, blink slowly then look away tactic to show I’m interested and then wait to see if they’d approach me. It was a more subtle way then directly approaching them. Don’t get me wrong it worked but now that I’m more mature and confident I wouldn't have a problem approaching someone I’m attracted to.

Kimchi_doll · Answer

I went up to this guy that me and so many girls thought was sexy and handsome. Told him I wanted to kick his a$$ in mortal combat and now we’re dating lol

Cynicaldreamer · Answer

Honestly? Because I assume he's already taken and seeing someone (which yes, usually is the case for men I like), or he's not interested in me.

That's not to say I won't be polite, chat, and say hi to him. But I'm not going to flirt or pursue him unless I'm sure he's interested and he's single.

AmandaYVR · Answer

Uh... intimidation. It's difficult enough talking to a complete stranger who's an average guy. Doing a cold approach with someone you think is gorgeous is terrifying.

But I've done it. And it's well worth it, ha. 😈

LivDev · Answer

Men underestimate how intimidating they can be if they have their shit together. Plus we're kinda socialized to assume that if a guy isn't approaching or signalling in any kind of way, then he's not interested.

And approaching an attractive/impressive guy that you think isn't attracted/impressed by you, can feel like

Why don't girls approach a handsome guy?

Dtate · Answer

Solid advice from a fellow objectively handsome man...

As men more often than not the burden is on us to make the first approach handsome or not. If she smiles at you and/or holds your gaze go say hey. If you have approach anxiety, put in the reps until you overcome your fear and get better (be willing to fail and embarrass yourself). Once you overcome the fear you have the option to have multiple women if you want because of the charisma you've built. Don't worry about #metoo bs; that's media brainwashing/cope vast majority of the time.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I literally have no game... if girls didn't approach me it would be impossible. My pick-up artist skills are pretty much flex muscles and getting them to approach me. I don't even think I'm handsome.

So I just disagree with this question... women do it all the time.

nitsuj86 · Answer

They do. Most of the time they will put themselves in his sight line and expect him to make the move though.

If you are asking for yourself, well you either aren't as handsome as you think. Or you are expecting way more out of women than you should. 90% are too afraid to approach.

boggboss · Answer

Because itsvstill seen as desperate for women to make the first move by many

megabamse · Answer

Because the are afraid of many things, like the competitions and the hassels of that, their own self image, it he's shallow, if he have no skill because he don't need it, that he's "spoiled", the chance he puts less efforts into most things and so on.

Heterosketero · Answer

You will not like the answer. Because rejection from an attractive man may compromise your ability to date other men in a hypergamous manner. If he rejects you, others may notice, others may reject you as well. This is a prospect for men as well, but not nearly so much as there is less hypergamy in male dating patterns.

littlered14 · Answer

Fear of rejection mostly. I tried it just because the what if scared me more and I received a, "I'm sorry. I'm not single" but he continues to stare at me from afar and avoid speaking to me now, which I find super weird.

Anonymous · Answer

Why would they?

Women get hit on constantly.

Think about it; if you had a choice between one or more of X amount of sure things why would you risk the awkwardness of a maybe from +1?

Not only is it not necessary for a woman but women are extremely averse to exposing themselves to this sort of risk, women are manipulators and prefer that someone else expose themselves to these 'dangers' on their behalf.

Pohjolan · Answer

Eh I'm in the middle where I'm enough unrepulsive for women to spontaneously approach me but mostly not enough attractive to be desirable.

Then again my dermatologist is just half done.

If a guy is really handsome but they don't approach him then they find him intimidating.

Or he isn't actually handsome.

PainusNdeeAnus · Answer

I don’t think I’m handsome at all but I’m well aware that how I look to me isn’t how other people see me

that being said when women see a guy they like they usually just stare at him until he makes eye contact and if she smiles then she wants you to come talk to her this is all from personal experiences

OfMiceandMen · Answer

Because they are likely just as nervous about being rejected as most guys are about approaching an attractive women. It is easier not to try, than try.

DermalPunch · Answer

With social media and dating apps loyalty has gone into the negative numbers. Everyone has git a roster going. I'm not approaching any dudes handsome or average but attractive.

If you're so handsome you approach!

devilish-cutie · Answer

I did but indirectly like adding on app and such but mostly good looking guys werent looking just for fun in my experience, not all but most so that makes me vary as well (im good looking)

Gibbons44 · Answer

Girls only approach when told by the social setting to do so. Usually, because a 'he' has enouvh money the setting would wsnt him to spend. You are probably too young to have any significant monetary... might?

JoeMichael67 · Answer

Forget what you see in movies and tv shows. In real life, majority of girls don't want a relationship with a guy they consider too good looking, because they don't want to have to constantly worry about you getting hit on and cheating.

ChefPapiChulo · Answer

Depends how handsome the guy is. I’m fairly handsome and I’ve had average to below average girls approach me. But being handsome isn’t always enough. Money will attract more women then good looks ever can.

FreyaRed · Answer

Maybe he is handsome just in his own imagination, that's why they ignore him.

SolitarySolace · Answer

Because they stick to the gender roles they like while criticizing and blaming men for the ones they don't

Anonymous · Answer

They will.  maybe not in the same way as guys, but they will make it known. Can be something like the girl telling a waiter to tell you to come to her, or sitting next to you at the bar.

Hellraiser1984 · Answer

Because men are supposed to do everything in dating. While women pick and choose what is good enough for them. And destroy the ones who aren't. Women suck.

rienna888 · Answer

Because getting rejected by somebody you’re attracted to is way more devastating, but I don’t approach any guy because I’m very shy

Sasha0426 · Answer

I learned my lesson to never do that unless I’m attractive myself. Attractive guys get very angry and hostile if unattractive woman approaches them.

Jltakk · Answer

Never heard of this magical stigma of women approaching first. Approach who you're attracted to, worst they could say is no. Who cares what random nobodies in a society thinks?

addisonb21 · Answer

Honestly because i’m scared of rejection even though it’s not healthy

fonduegirl · Answer

Different women have different types. Maybe they don't see him as attractive.

HippieVeganJewslim · Answer

They do. I got approached by a girl when I was a guy. Wait a second, Nevermind. I’m as ugly as Kurt. I feel stupid and contagious.

Babygirl_S · Answer

I approached the guy I'm dating right now. I was so scared of being rejected. Girls are more emotional and sensitive.

NostalgiaSenpi · Answer

They don't give a fuck. They get approached. They don't need to.

Anonymous · Answer

Quite often but not always, handsome men are frequently seeking trophy wives.

Anonymous · Answer

I’m shy or think they’re not interested in me.

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

Many reasons. For the same reason men won’t approach a beautiful girl. They might hold on to the idea that men are supposed to make the move. Or they just plain don’t need to.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Maybe for the same reason that a lot of gorgeous women barely date: intimidation.

Anonymous · Answer

It is typically some combination of entitlement and cowardice, with a bit of ignorance sprinkled in.

thorboy · Answer

they want us to deal with rejection because women are fragile.

In_Trance · Answer

because there is a stigma surrounding women approaching men

Anonymous · Answer

It's usually a combination of cowardice and entitlement.

Anonymous · Answer

I never approach anyone, i have social anxiety

es20490446e · Answer

Because he's more intimidating.

Nikki1989 · Answer

They often do.

sage2021 · Answer

Because they always approached me first 🙂

Stressyalaire · Answer

You just haven't seen me do it!

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Why don't guys approach a beautiful girl?

Fanfare690 · Answer

Who cares what he looks like?

Anonymous · Answer

They will approach us if they like us.

Anonymous · Answer

They're too scared. Or they assume he's a Chad

Anonymous · Answer

Your personality or demeanor could be repulsive.

DreamGlow · Answer

Maybe they don't find him attractive enough?

Guy13 · Answer

Intimidated.

Minahh · Answer

Fear of rejection

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

Yes I do!

Anonymous · Answer

Cause they don't think you are handsome

serious_miss419 · Answer

What for?

KrissAvarr00 · Answer

Expectations?

Why don't girls approach a handsome guy?

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