This random girl who I don’t know and never met decided to add me on IG in late February and even responded to DM’s. She then continuously responded to my messages quickly, laughed at my jokes, sent me vids of herself and things she shares with friends to me. Things seem to be clicking. She said she’d be open to meeting up but her parents are strict. Right now she’s on vacation by herself and she even said she’ll get me a small gift when she gets back. Unfortunately, 12 days ago my dad passed away, I told her the next day what happened which was April 10th. Since then i haven’t heard anything from her. No remorse, no I’m sorry for your loss, nothing. I know you may say if she’s on vacation maybe she didn’t see the message you sent. Thing is, she’s liking posts on Instagram that are new from the past few days therefore she’s obviously active on social media. It hurts because for a parent to pass away, she seems like she doesn’t care, although she didn’t read the message, it is sent.
The last thing my dad asked before he passed away was is there any good news in terms of finding a girl? I said not right now, I was going to mention this girl who I thought I was getting along with but I didn’t tell him, personally that hurts and if she can’t even acknowledge that, I don’t know how women can be so called hearted. Even if she doesn’t like me that way, or there’s someone she met who she likes more, ok I can accept that and move on. But at least show respect and give some condolence. If she doesn’t want to talk to me it’s fine she can move on and I can as well, but I consider it rude on her end.
What Girls Said
If she's not responding then it's probably best to move on, it honestly sounds like she's not interested in pursuing the relationship further.
How come she couldn’t even say respond about my dad passing away, to not even send condolences is just flat out rude. It’s one thing to not be interested but to be a cold hearted person when a guys dad passes shows a girls true colours. I really don’t trust women anymore. I didn’t do anything wrong. If every girl wants to hate me, then I really don’t care if I die.
I'm sure there's someone out there for you, I'm sorry about your father. It must have been really hard on you, I'm really sorry to hear that.
Look on the bright side though, if she treated you like that then just imagine how many other guys she may have done that to as well. You very well could have dodged a bullet with her, just saying.
Also, don't be so hard on yourself, chin up, keep a good head on your shoulders. It will be okay.
You know let me be honest about something for some reason whether its on here, social media, or in flesh (real life) women tend to hate men and guys because of past experiences. Abusive father, absent father, ex boyfriends taking advantage of her, guys being rude with her, sexual assault, I get it, it sucks and it makes you lose trust in people. I have tried my best throughout the years to be there for girls and try to be the rational guy but to speak to her properly. Now I know often at times girls will say, ohh so what you were only nice to her because you wanted something in return. In my case its different. It's not just about sex, it wasn't the main point. I've actually turned out women who wanted a one night stand. I've talked to girls who went to the University of Texas or Marquette University in Milwaukee or girls from New York asking to hook up, I never did. There's only so much in me to trust women now, I truly, truly mean this. At my stage in my life I can't stand the drama.
Throughout the last 15 years this is what I have dealt with
- Ex boyfriend threatening to kick my ass at prom for asking out his ex girlfriend, I didn't go to senior prom so she would enjoy her prom
- Girls purposely using dating apps like Tinder to be a ho (pardon my language) and just talk to dudes for fun and games... I later found this out
- Other girls telling me I'm not good enough, I'm this and that
- Having an interest in certain only, they messages back, laughed at my jokes, engaged in conversations only to tell me, I'm taken - married or in a relationship
- Recent girls like the one I mentioned, adds ME to Instagram, responds to my DMs, laughs at my jokes, says I'm a good respectful guy and pulls this
The list goes on, what optimism should I have with girls now?
I cook, I clean, I am in grad school, I plan to get my own place, I try to be honest/reliable/loyal, I am not trying to take advantage or cheat someone in life. I guess being friendly, honest with some integrity isn't good enough. I don't do drugs, I don't sleep around, I don't drink booze, I don't party, I can give a girl space if she wants to travel alone and do her own thing I'm cool with that. I am not some abusive control freak. But I am getting tired of this shit, I am tired of the wounds girls keep inflicting. I am not some push over, trust me, I can stand up for myself and be direct. But I'm tired of this.