Am I Self Hating Or Am I Logical?

Anonymous
I'm a black woman, I am ugly. This is not a troll post, not all of the times but most of the times people look at my face in disgust. I have been called ugly far more than I've been called pretty, I am aware. I am also dark I'm 5'5 and 139 lbs this changes nothing, my boyfriend is white. He thinks I am the most beautiful thing he tells me I am but I don't believe him because I am not. Although I do love him I may also have my own personal agenda by being with him that I've also expressed. I want better looking offspring, especially if she is a female. I DO NOT want a daughter that looks like me at all because I cannot carry the pain and hurt she will experience being ugly along with my own ugly pain. I am fine with boys usually ugly women make nice looking boys. I believe that his features will wash out mines, I want my children to be treated fairly and not like how I have for being ugly. Am I Self hating or being logical?
You're self hating
You're being logical
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Am I Self Hating Or Am I Logical?
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