Why would she double message me? She flirted in the past but we’re not on good terms now? What’s her motive?

[Anonymous]

This attached girl (lives with SO, maybe financially dependent, maybe not) at work and I had a flirty dynamic which she’d pushed for awhile. I had messaged her for a while before backing off; then I had tried to have convo with her to set boundary lines but she ducked out multiple times. Eventually after she came back (chasing attention I thought when I gave her space) I got angry with her for neither leaving me alone nor discussing my boundaries and raised my voice.

She cut off our social media friendship and said she’d only talk about work. I’ve basically ignored her since tho she doesn’t seem to be happy with that. It’s admittedly been awkward but I see no better option.

Recently I sent her a lighthearted email at work reminding her about a question she’d asked me about how to handle a work task involving us both and an empty workspace (and she’d seemingly forgotten my answer by 1 day later). She apologized.

then she sends me a picture on our social media chat of the note she left herself as a reminder.

I was busy and didn’t reply. 2 hours later she DMs again before I’ve responded & asks me about a humorous thing I do at work to punish the other coworkers which I’d mentioned in the work email.

then the next day she leaves a bit of artwork making fun of herself in the empty workspace I had said I was monitoring temporarily.

I get that I didn’t have to be friendly discussing the task but why is she pushing this work email conversation further and back onto social media? Seems unnecessary to do with someone you don’t like.

[HappyWoman34]

I’m not sure. It sounds a bit like she’s changed her mind though.

[Asker]

Interesting what makes you say that?

[HappyWoman34]

She’s not engaging on social media.

[Asker]

But she is though; for some reason she took the work conversation I had sent through work email and switched it back to our old Social media chat (literally right under the 6 month old messages where she unfriended me and said “work only) double messaging me in that thread.

That’s what confuses me.

[HappyWoman34]

That’s weird.

[inhua]

this is a dangerous game you're playing

[Asker]

Prior to this I’d been keeping the distance. I’ve always always given her plenty of space to disengage from me, but it feels like when I do that eventually she comes back pushing into my sphere of concentration.

She’s a 9 or 10 in my book; would’ve totally went for it work aside if she weren’t attached. But since she wasn’t I pretty much ignored her until she started talking to/flirting with me.

Sometimes I wonder if that’s why she does what she does——most guys hit on her or happily chat her up…I don’t.

I’m never going to do anything serious while she’s attached and if she ever brings it up I’ll tell her the only way I’d even consider it is if she gets in touch when she’s single.

And personally I wouldn’t do anything until she’d been single several months…I don’t need vengeful exes blowing up at me lol