I've been messaging a girl on whatsapp for over 4 months. It's a bit of a strange situation because we're not "friends" but we're also not in a relationship yet and haven't shared any feelings for each other either. We just chat about random things every day but there seems to be a weird tension between us and I can't really figure it out. Either way, she's friendly and chatty and we get on well with each other.
Anyway, we often send photos of what we're doing and I've noticed that instead of sending a photo that she took, she'll often send a photo that a friend took with her in the picture somewhere. I thought this was her way of sending me photos of herself without being too bold and obvious (she's quite shy and never posts photos of herself on her socials) but more recently she's started sending them as one-time view only. She's also started sending more obvious photos of herself (group photos and selfies with her friends etc) but I'm confused as to why she only shares them as one-time view. I'm a super private/confidential guy so she knows I'd never send them on or share them with anyone.
I brought this up in a light-hearted way with her yesterday and asked if she agreed that one-time views were a bit pointless but she disagreed and didn't give a reason why.
Is there any reason why she'd start doing this? All of the one-time view photos she sends me have her in the picture, but most of them are group photos or photos where she's in the background or distance and previously she'd send these sort of photos on normal view.
To be fair, I never send her selfies and very rarely send her photos with me in the picture but I'm just wanting to know if anyone has an opinion on why she's made this change...
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Here are a few potential reasons why she might only be sending one-time view photos:
- Shyness/privacy - As you said, she's quite shy and private on social media. Sending one-time view photos allows her to share pictures with you without them being permanently visible on her phone or yours. It preserves some privacy and control over the images.
- Testing boundaries - By sending one-time view photos instead of regular ones, she can gauge your reaction and interest level without fully committing yet. It's a lower risk way for her to slowly open up.
- Ambiguity - Keeping the relationship dynamic ambiguous through one-time view photos means she hasn't clearly defined it as romantic yet. It preserves plausible deniability and uncertainty.
- Changing her mind - She may change her mind about sharing the photos permanently after sending them. One-time view allows her to retract an image if she gets self-conscious.
- Subtle flirtation - For some girls, sending photos you can only see once is a teasing, flirty thing to do. It leaves the recipient wanting more. Maybe she's attracted to you but taking it slow.
Hard to say for sure, but those would be my guesses. Hopefully giving her some reassurance that you respect her privacy helps put her more at ease over time. Sounds like she definitely likes you!
How would anyone else know if she won't give you the actual reason?
I didn't ask if anyone knew. I asked for people's "opinion on why she's made this change"
You haven't made her feel comfortable and she doesn't trust you
I agree with her potentially not feeling comfortable, but she definitely trusts me. She's known me for years, she's trusted me in the past, she shares secrets and very personal information with me, and her general behavior towards me indicates that she likes me.
It's a bit strange but I'm not worried, just curious. I appreciate your input though
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