In the romance genre the idea of the “bad boy” archetype combines a few ideas that make them so popular.
First, the idea of a man changing for you: there’s something very powerful in having someone who thinks so highly of you and your opinion that they’re willing to change their lifestyle or something about themselves to earn your favor.
Second, the way men love women in romance novels is the same way women love men but for them. They give themselves wholly to them in these novels, their priority is their lover and they’re happy to give their attention.
And thirdly, a bad boy is just a sexy look. Dark eyes, dark clothes, tattoos, overall masculine energy, you get the vibe pretty quick if I say “bad boy” and you get an image pretty close to that in your mind. And there’s an appealing sensation in knowing that look is a front, a way to protect themselves, and they reveal that vulnerability to their partner. Makes you feel special.
Bad boys are just fantasies for women mostly. If you’re seeing a woman date a bad boy, then he’s probably not as bad as you think behind closed doors.
Interesting. I tell you one thing though. If then she gets into trouble she is on her own. Or perhaps she can turn to her sexy bad boy for help, and we'll see how hot he is at helping her out.
And I appeal to all the decent guys out there who might be reading this. Steel your hearts. Don't let them use you.
I think you missed the bit at the end where I said it was a fantasy, implying he’s actually a good guy in order to get a girlfriend
No, he isn't. That is you trying to defend him of all his shortcomings and bad attributes.
What some people deem "bad boys" isn't what others think it is. It's subjective.
I don't think who is the bad boy is very subjective. They all fit a certain profile more or less.
To add. "Bad boy" is a vibe mostly not an action at all.
So the meme by some men that all women want a drug dealer/addict abuser with multiple felonies at this point is a meme only lol. It's not true because the majority of women don't date this type of guy.
So when you hear women even bring up "bad boy" it's because a guy just gives off a vibe of being not shy, not by the book, not overly wholesome and so sweet you get a freaking cavity. A guy who doesn't break laws but also doesn't always play by every rule. A guy who is socially forward, sometimes opinionated, passionate, stands up for themselves even if it means we aren't always happy because of it, somebody that isn't going to just straight up simp for us.
You ever seen that actor that women say gives off bad boy vibes but that actor doesn't actually physically do anything bad? It's like that.
Many men just like to say that women want practically Satan because then it makes women look like bad people for not choosing the overly nice guy.
It's very much "oh she didn't choose me, she chose that chad over there? Well I think he's an asshole. So she must be into really bad guys. He definitely probably beats her, I bet he's doing drugs too."
It's a way to slander the competition and the woman involved at the same time.
You mention some good points. But I still think girls tend to gravitate towards the bad boy. I don't go as far as to call him Satan or that he is a drug dealer, but the bad boy I have as a stereotype in mind has a certain look, and a certain attitude. And above all a carefree mindset. Doesn't care about the consequences. leave for the moment attitude. Which I think is the fun girls like. And which is also the characteristic which tends to get bad boys into trouble.
But what makes them "bad"? Because most times these "bad boys" don't do anything bad at all. Women aren't dating sociopaths and psychopaths and criminals and abusers in droves. I can tell you. I'm a woman. I have many many friends that are women. I know a lot of women. They aren't dating these types of men at all or have ever liked these guys.
No no, I don't mean bad in that sense! I told you already. You are taking it too far with equating bad boys with psychopaths and sociopaths. What makes them bad is that they are often rebellious, they have an I don't care attitude not thinking about consequences. For example this last one alone is very problematic. It can harm other people in many different ways. I don't know, I'm trying my best to describe the bad boy. He is not a psychopath or necessarily a criminal (although he has good potential to be or become a criminal!). He is that kind who does not take things seriously (and people too), you cannot thrust him, he is irresponsible and its all about himself at the end of the day. Unlike for example the good guy, who is respectful, law abiding, works hard, and you can thrust him that he is there when you need him.
It is what they call the nature of the beast I think. The former is no good, but lots of fun, the latter is good but ordinary and not very exciting.
You're trying your best to describe him because it's hard to actually describe isn't it?
That's because what's bad to you isn't bad to me or other women I know probably. The things you describe as "bad boy" vibe isn't what I do or any woman I know. That's why it's too simple to say most women want bad boys. What kind do you mean? Apparently not all of so called "bad boys" are exactly the same. They're men after all and every guy is different and not a hive mind. There is no typical "bad boy" it's all subjective.
Its hard to define any stereotype not just the bad boy, because you are right there is not a strict definition for any stereotype. But they tend to have common traits. Just like the nerd, the nice guy, the bitch, and so on. So if you can keep in mind that we are not talking science here we get more easy going. :P
Stereotype... And there is your problem.
The fact that generalizing the majority of women to all liking the same thing right out of the gate is incorrect and misogynistic in itself. So mistakes were already made.
Also not all "nice guys" are actually nice so they don't even fit that stereotype. A lot of "Nice guys" are only nice to women because they think they'll get something out of it.
So we can't even say nice guys are who they are.
What common traits does a bitch have besides being mean or rude? It's not a certain attraction level because there are mean and rude people of all looks really.
This is where stereotypes and generalization breaks down when you actually look at it more than a surface thing.
Ok madam as you wish. We have different views. Period.
Just remember unless you can prove what you said or disprove what I said my opinion is as good as yours. And now give me a break please lol. ☺️
I'm not saying you can't have an opinion but an opinion isn't always gospel. That's all I'm saying. You can break at any time. I don't control you lol 🤣
Have a nice day
“They all fit a certain profile”. Well, for starters, women don’t find closed minded, judgmental boys as attractive. So maybe fix that perception rather than blame some magical “bad boy”
@mandyfire98 what’s with all these self proclaimed “good boys” who seem to have an answer to their own question and get angry when forced to self reflect? Gawd. Like no wonder they can’t land any women. Must be all those BAD boys. Like fuck. Grow up little boy.
I get it. I understand. They want a girl, that girl doesn't want them she wants another guy. A guy that isn't shy and socially awkward. The guy the girl goes for is more forward, confident, outspoken, social, he's louder, boisterous sometimes, opposite of shy. He's the exact opposite of the shy, awkward guy.
The shy guy who got turned down thinks he's what's good, what is right, he doesn't need to fix anything or work on anything. He's good as is. So that means his competition is wrong and the girl is wrong and her wires have to be crossed to like the competition. So the competition becomes "bad guys" they're wrong, they're the enemy and the girl is just brainwashed to like the enemy. She has to be because how could she not like the perfect shy awkward non social guy. He's right and everybody else is wrong. So now the girl has to be wrong, she has to only be into bad guys because if not, she'd date the shy, socially awkward guy. The competition becomes slandered by being portrayed as a "Chad" "he probably beats her too" "he's into drugs and stuff, she probably is to that's why she's brainwashed."
"I've heard women say the term bad boy, oh they're admitting he's a drug addict abuser"
Bad boy couldn't possibly just be slang and not literally mean the guy is awful or evil. No way words can have non literal meanings or anything
💯 percent.
How do you square this and the reality we live in where ~actually bad men who have been genuine monsters to women~ like Ted Bundy or Richard Ramirez will have had more admirers and love letters in their lives then all the men in your replied combined?
I understand that said admirers make up a vastly small percentage of all women, most of whom would say "I'd never date a guy like that" but mathematically, the numbers are what they are.
@foxsquirrell
I'm allowed to block who I want. I blocked you not because we disagree but because you have to have the last word all the time. You are a narcissist and I don't like your "respectful" views on women. This isn't just about this one question. It's about your other views as well. If I don't want yo interact with redpill incel men then I can block all I want to. I have that right on this site.
You have now because you're so angry you didn't get the last word, are now thanks to your recent update, harassing me. Pure and simple. It's also against the rules of this site to @ mention me in your question or update.
I am now "respectfully" asking you to stop harassing me and stop being obsessed with me do much you have to keep mentioning me even on your questions and updates. I'll be reporting you so be assured.
@NathanDavis I hate to drag you into this but I'm being mentioned now in his question.
@JakeShepard95 Your question is directed to mandyfire98 right? I just want to be sure. I'm not that knowledgeable regarding the functioning of GaG replies and stuff.
That’s a perception. The so called “bad boy” to you is really just anyone who possesses confidence and charisma. They are sure of themselves. They know who they are and where they’re going; these are men who don’t just attract women- they command respect of other men. You see what you don’t have and get jealous. Rather than look inward and develop the needed confidence and charisma, you blame someone else- which, I must note- is a very UNattractive habit. It shows you’re unable to self reflect, you generalize women, assign “labels”, resist accountability and improving yourself.
so your question shouldn’t be “why do girls like bad boys”? It should be “why would girls not like a closed minded, judgmental whiner who generalizes women’s preferences to makeup for his shortcomings”. And well, I think that answer is obvious.
Because extremely attractive people have personalities that tend to go that route due to them understanding how valuable they are to others.
Not all bad characters are attractive. They often look like scum actually these bad guys. They look like scum, and guess what... they are. And they know it.
@foxsquirrell - I'm not addressing all bad characters. I'm addressing attractive people with more dark & confident traits:
Skip to 16:30
https://youtu.be/n4aMiAesXjE?t=989
But your reply started with the word because. And that suggests that in fact you are saying that all bad boys are attractive!
Oh dear... Listen... The word "because" is written to express A cause or reason, yes. However, this word is not confined to only being used when one finds THE (one and only) reason. Similarly, the inserted word "tend" should have made you aware that specificity was not the aim. "Tend" is purposefully used to highlight a GENERAL pattern within the behaviors, not THE (one and only) pattern of behavior.
I have a triple digit IQ, my friend. I would never simplify the world to the degree you suggest I have. Let's get back on task, shall we? 🥂
You are right. I do mean a general trend. You can't put them all precisely in one basket, I know that. But the way you answered has not much room for interpretation. You said because they are attractive. Even if I understand that perhaps you did not mean to say that all of them are extremely attractive, you must have meant that that is the main reason. That is to say most of them are extremely attractive. There was nothing else in your original reply. Sorry to say.
I understand. Well, my apologies for the confusion. I simply thought it was well known that 'likable' people who happen to possess dark triad traits tend to be facially & bodily attractive to very socially acceptable degrees. My original answer for the question displays such an assumption due to my extensive knowledge regarding the sexual aspect of human nature. As a consequence, I know that when most women say they want/like 'bad boys', they're almost always referring to the guy above in the picture below as opposed to the guy below him.
Opinion
8Opinion
Bad boys are more fun. A girl who isn't thinking beyond the weekend will love bad boys. They ride motorcycles, get in fights, and keep countless girls on a leash.
But women who are thinking about their future, their children, security and safety wouldn't go near a bad boy.
Best answer!
In very simplified terms. Women LOVE confidence, I think most people know that. But fewer know, or want to admit, that they love it so much that it comes before a lot of other criteria for women. To the point that a lot of them would rather be with a confident not-so-nice guy then a nice guy that lacks confidence. Then rationalization kicks in with most of them thinking that they can change the former.
So try to be a confident nice guy. But don't go thinking that you can replace confidence with agreeableness as you will most likely be doomed to fail.
After my ex and I broke up, I ended up liking a "bad boy" simply because he was the polar opposite of my ex. Never was much into them, but we also had a LOT in common, it was so strange. He was like the male equivalent of me. We laughed at the same things, talked at the same time, thought the same way about things, etc. Our flirty banter was so natural and fun and I liked that he took charge even though I'm usually the one taking charge. But then he started mentioning how he did/does do drugs which is a bit of a turn off for me and essentially tortures women when he has sex with them. He was very disrespectful of boundaries that I had set in place and kept trying to break me so I had to stop contact with him.
You see how much of a scum they are at the end of the day. They are garbage dear. Undesirables. Its like when you have a garden full of nice plants and trees, and maybe some flowers which all look good, but then there are weeds, those which you need to uproot every time and throw away. Same with bad boys. You recognize them from a mile away and before they even open their mouths. I have no sympathy for women who get in trouble because they are in a relationship with such a scum as I just described. She should not have chose him in the first place I say to myself. Good for you girls who always someone in society who acts kindly towards you instead of reasoning along my line of thinking. Because I would simply ignore you/them no matter what in these cases. I mean it. I will see to it that I let you enjoy what you should have expected from a bad boy all along.
With regards to the first part of your answer where you basically said that you enjoyed his company because you basically found a lot of common ground I can understand. I think we all wish to have someone we can relate to and be on the same wavelength so to speak. Just don'f find one of those scum of society. Not that I am telling you to settle for a mamma's boy nerd. I can understand you there too if you are not interested in that as well. But there are plenty of normal guys out there. Just avoid the scum. Ignore them, let them take drugs until they overdose in desperation.
He's a very troubled man who, from what he told me, comes from a very troubled family. I genuinely did like him and I loved spending time with him, but once I told him I liked him, it was like every alarm in my body was screaming "do NOT get involved with this guy!!!" I would shiver uncontrollably when we talked, which I can't say has ever happened to me before. I never trusted anything he said and I honestly didn't see a long-lasting relationship with him. He was more of a fun plaything, as awful as that sounds. And when I came to the conclusion that our relationship wasn't going to go any further, I had to say goodbye for good.
So you did not go in bed with him just for fun? It is what I think about these kind of guys. In the sense that girls like them for fun.
So you don't sleep with guys you like just for fun?
Why do men? Thrill is fun, until they move on. But like bad girls they aren't the type to bring home to holiday gatherings.
Listen to these anons with their "rape fantasies" responses. They don't even look up the medical/clinical reasoning behind "rape fantasies", it isn't about rape at all, but quick to spread their warped bs versions of actual facts.
I like sharp minds with witty humor and challenging character... and definitely responsible men...
^this 100%
Ah, this old myth raises its ugly head once again.
lol.
We can not paint everyone with single brush.
We can paint a lot of them though with a single brush haha
Define a “bad boy”. A normal dude with a motorcycle and tattoos or a drug dealer?
For the same reason that boys like bad girls: failed upbringing
They tell u want they want no games, no confusion, kind of like oldr men.
They have rape fantasies. It's normal for females.
lol.
I was going to say stuff, but I think every girl here already said it for me.
They bring the drama and tension
I'm not into bad boys. I'm more for the good guys.
Because they treat them bad
Which is a turn on for some women
Because of money
What do you mean? Its easier for girls to get money from bad boys because they are usually careless and not that bright?
Assholes spend money as opposed to nice guys
Loll interesting! I think you are right! I am a nice guy then. I don't like to squander money. I'm the kind who likes to be careful with how I spend my money.
Daddy issues or into games.
Can you explain to me daddy issues in this context?
maybe their father was not present or not present enough when they were a child. They didn't get the adequate amount of attention from a father figure. This can make a woman turn to an unstable man for attention and care. But of the wrong kind. Not necessarily a womans fault but it is their job to do the work on themselves so they start loving themselves and choose better. Nobody wants a F boy in the end and will end up going in a cycle of heartbreak wanting what is unattainable. Guys prey on women like this.
*bad guys *bad boys prey on women like this
But you mean to say that a good girl from a stable family is unlikely to gravitate towards a bad boy, or have a crush on him?
There are most likely things that are not known about said "stable" family. But in general, yes, a girl that was brought up with a stable life and caring parents most likely will not choose a bad boy.
Be ass to get some ass 😎
Daddy issues
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