Do men think it’s desperate for a woman to make the first move?

Question

My dad always told me that I should let the man come up to me and I shouldn’t look their way more than once etc… which is more appealing?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Sometimes a guy that likes you won't make the first move even if you are dropping hints. Take my husband for instance. I met him when I was 14 in the church hall after mass. I was never intrested in boys b4 that but when I first met him I was instantly turned on, he was so tall and handsome and I had to change my underwear which were drenched when I got home. Anyway I spent a year trying to let him know I liked him when i would meet him out randomly at different events and I just thought he didn't like me because I'm so short and much younger than him. Anyway I met him one day at the local leisure centre in the health suite. I had just come from a swim and was going to the sauna when I met him coming out. I was wearing my swim suit which isn't too races but I caught him checking me out from the front and back as though he'd never noticed that I am a woman. So we get to talking and I look down and he had an enormous boner and I just stared in shock and he left embarrassed. A few days later after mass he came over to apologise saying he didn't know what happened and I replied that I knew exactly what happened and that he should ask me out sometime. He did and the rest is history but if I did seize that moment right then and there being forward we would never have gotten together.

Nikki1989 · Accepted Answer

Possibly. Men always whine that women don't make any moves, but when they do, most men can't get away fast enough.

imtiaz45 · Accepted Answer

Most men do not think it’s desperate for a woman to make the first move—in fact, many find it refreshing and confident. Taking the initiative shows self-assurance, interest, and clarity, traits often admired regardless of gender. In today’s evolving social dynamics, traditional norms are less rigid, and mutual pursuit is increasingly valued. A woman making the first move can also alleviate uncertainty and make communication more straightforward. While individual perspectives may vary, confidence in expressing genuine interest is rarely perceived as desperation; instead, it’s seen as empowering and modern, often sparking admiration and intrigue from the other party

Static_In_The_Attic · Accepted Answer

I always say if you like someone you shouldn’t be afraid to tell them & in life if you never try you will never know & if you snooze you lose. On the other side of things times are changing & nowadays a lot of guys aren’t making the first move so if you like someone make a move.

Anonymous · Answer

It depends. I don’t think it’s desperate on your part. Just make sure you know he’s feeling the same way about you. At the same time if you’re wanting a more somewhat traditional relationship then that would go against a traditional relationship. I’ve never had to think about it as far as women making the first move w me, it was always expected that as a man I made all the moves, planned dates, things like that. It might be nice to have a lady approach me once. I said might because I don’t k ow how I’d react. Not only that if I didn’t like her physically speaking g I’d feel bad for I g her down. I’ve been w my girl for 16 years, I pretty much plan everything as far as dates, vacations, paying bills. Bit to me that’s normal, it’s not stressful at all.

slatyb · Answer

Ignore him. Some worthy men are shy. I've known very nice men who didn't think they were all that much. One guy who had acne scarring crushed on a woman for years but never asked her out. Finally she was engaged to someone else and he expressed his regret. She had been crushing on him too but thought he was too intellectual for her. She married her fiance. I saw her some years later and she was unhappy in her marriage.

Don't be that woman. Ask for what you want -- a date, a promotion, a discount, whatever. If you don't ask, you don't get.

CuriousMoonFox · Answer

That depends on what you regard as making the first move. If we're talking establishing eye contanct and smiling, then no, it's not desperate. Quite the opposite. It is the invitation they need to approach you. Because you don't want to be approached by a guy you didn't invite (unless it's the man of your dreams). If we're talking about the actual approach i. e. walking across the room, saying "Hi." and so on then kind of. Most men would probably be happy about it but at the same time suspicious because that doesn't happen very often.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I keep seeing these questions and I'm starting to wonder why women even have this idea at all that we don't like to be advanced upon. WE LOVE IT!!!

But to be real... don't become lame like some dudes do, and not take the hint when the advance isn't wanted. I've seen women freak out harder at rejection than I've seen crazy dudes do. It's like, "It's okay... that person just doesn't want to get to know you any better." 😂 🤣

Do men think it’s desperate for a woman to make the first move?

phraseology · Answer

I think if you don't put in the work, you'll get no where. Both men and women have to both want it for something to happen. If a women doesn't make the effort because she fears looking desperate (rejection) she's going to be lonely for a long time.

godfatherfan · Answer

I love when women make the first move. It doesn't have to be crazy, just let me know that they are open to whatever it might be. Be it a date, sex, or whatever. The best woman I ever dated , on our first date, grabbed me and said "I really have been wanting to do this" and kissed me. That was amazing. Then I knew it was ok to kiss her.

tzdc21 · Answer

Okay, I don't mean to be disrespectful or anything like that, but your dad is setting you up for failure in today's dating atmosphere because it has become incredibly risky for men to approach because he doesn't want to have the creepy label due to the metoo movement. Then you'll hardly ever get approached, especially by the good guys. Aholes, sure, but you dont aant those. It's not desperate at all, in fact since it almost never happens, most guys would love it and be flattered by it.

RingOfFire · Answer

I have to admit that when a woman approaches me it takes points away from her. That doesn't mean it isn't possible that I could have interest, but even if I find it attractive there is something about that that seems unnatural and it's kind of a turnoff.

GoodManDave · Answer

For me, it isn't desperate. It'd be a nice change. I could try to relax a little because at least for once, she's meeting me halfway on something. There's a tiny amount of "give" there.

Anonymous · Answer

If you want sex approach.

If you want a man who will drain you for whatever he can get out of you. Approach and outside him.

If you want a relationship and commitment from a man that will be a man and not a mother he sleeps with then no. Only accept men who approach.

If a guy won't or can't approach you he is either with someone or not relationship ready.

Choice is yours.

Raaj4you · Answer

No, it's not desperate to make a first move. Make a move if you are truly interested in the guy. If he is interested he'll say  Yes  or if not he'll say  No . Life would be more easy if both men and women open up about their feelings towards each other. ❤️

Abbycado · Answer

I don't think so. I went up to my boyfriend at a party. Granted, he was giving me pretty good indication he was into me. Those eyes are telling. XD

Anonymous · Answer

Of course not. I understand your dad saying you shouldn't look thier way more than once. But what was thier reaction? The REALITY is some guys simply cannot read a woman interest. And some women are simply terrible at showing sufficient interest. I virtually NEVER make the first move. But it's not necessarily because I'm not interested.

lucas10 · Answer

i don't think it's wrong for a woman to take the first move but usually this is a man job , so if a guy is hesitating to make the first move it doesn't mean he's shy or he's unconfident , maybe he has some other concerns that stopping him for making the first move or he might not be romantically attracted to you , there must be a reason

Garud · Answer

I don't think so.  I believe she is a brave woman who is taking a risk. If a woman asks me out and I say no for some reason, then as a man I will congratulate her and encourage her

DryGermanGuy · Answer

"When I was your age I never chased a boy or called a boy or sat in a parked car with a boy!"  - Lorraine McFly, Back to the Future

Fireguy17 · Answer

nope, not at all. Who cares who makes the first move? this isn't some kids game, we are adults, so start adulting! You see someone you are interested in go for it, or you may never know.

art84 · Answer

I would want a girl to make the first move, least it shows that your interested. Like myself I wouldn't make a move especially since I am shy. It's not desperate since you want to be friends with the opposite sex and find them attractive.

red-lipstick-girl · Answer

Your father is absolutely right. When I took the first step, my boyfriend threw it in my face and we eventually broke up.

itsannalee · Answer

I don’t think so, my man would love that if i make first move 😂

Unit1 · Answer

Not. At. All. Your father's told you trash advice. Forget he said that.

Christian_Cartier · Answer

I've never though it is desperate; maybe just bold. But you don't need to make the move, just show that you're interested. If you only look my way once I will assume you're not interested.

Finchie40 · Answer

Not at all , it works both ways , if you see someone you are attracted to , Go for it

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

It is not, but I understand your dad's advice. Generally, if the girl makes the first move, its more subtle, and she does not insist, that is more appealing, I suppose.

genericname85 · Answer

if you want it, go and get it. there's nothing desparate about going and getting what you want.

jamesgoldman · Answer

Nope, both my exes did Since MeToo it has changed so previous generations aren't that clued up on it

TheStaleMarshmellow · Answer

At this point, if you like like someone, COMMUNICATE IT or suffer the regret. This isn't middle school anymore

Pohjolan · Answer

No. Most women aren't even making a move when they think that they do. Like approaching someone and striking a conversation is just basic socialising.

glennos89 · Answer

I absolutely love it when woman make the first move on me. That way I know that she really likes me

paledreams · Answer

If she's 30 plus or if she's unappealing and not 30 plus or only 20 plus lol 😆🤣 varies

Nerdvana · Answer

I don't see it as desperate if a woman approaches me first. Actually I like her confidence. Makes think she is friendly.

zagor · Answer

No. I don't know if she has a boyfriend or husband, is gay, etc. I don't feel comfortable cold-approaching someone I don't know well.

AmeerX · Answer

I don't mind first move from beautiful women. But most beautiful women expect the man to make the first move and end up with players unfortunately

Staximus · Answer

I think this is an idiotic standard. If a woman doesn't show any interest, how is the guy supposed to know to make a move?

Anonymous · Answer

I don’t think most guys think that. A few very jaded or very old fashioned guys might think that, but not most.

JaneDoe95676187 · Answer

Mem were born for the chase. And nothing worth having comes easily

IHateBeingaMan · Answer

doesn't matter because why do i get the feeling that men will always be stuck with this, hence why most FA people are male-dominated

kiktimbu · Answer

Depends. Guys who like dominant women would love the first move from women

Graptemys79 · Answer

I don't think so. I would love it, if she were my type.

Emmytexrex · Answer

Nah we don't think like that except you went overboard with it

Anonymous · Answer

Why would it be any more "desperate" for a woman to do it than a man? Can you not see the female entitlement in that opinion?

Crazzyyworld · Answer

No not necessary.. u just have to know what you dealing with.. all men are dogs NOT CAT

Britney92 · Answer

No, cause someone could beat you to it. Perhaps they're too shy.

dsrice071966 · Answer

It is fine with me for the woman to make the first move.

ManOnFire · Answer

Men don't think it's desperate. Women do.

ClassicDropout · Answer

No, I feel appreciated when women talk to me first

DrPepper12 · Answer

No. Next question

Ironic_Method · Answer

I prefer women to come on to me.

CubaPirate · Answer

The hell no I find it cute in a hot way lol

Slim57 · Answer

Not at all, we want more women to do it

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

I LOOOOOOVE WHEN GIRLS DO THAT

MasterKS · Answer

No, i find it more sexy.

236color · Answer

No I don't.

LiamJHayden · Answer

I don't.

DerekC321 · Answer

No, it's welcome.

jahaims · Answer

Nope

BarryLiverstone · Answer

It’s not desperate

hotman5 · Answer

nope

spacedantys · Answer

nope

Do men think it’s desperate for a woman to make the first move?

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Do men think it’s desperate for a woman to make the first move?

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Do most women expect men to make the first move?

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