Is it a bad sign?

[Anonymous]

I started seriously dating a girl three months ago, though we’ve known each other since February.

Whenever we meet, she seems happy and holds my hand. However, she never says things like "I love you" or "I missed you." I often express these feelings because I genuinely mean them.

Should I be concerned that I’m more invested in this relationship than she is? Or is she simply not very verbal about her feelings? Have you ever been in a relationship like this that turned out to be successful?

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude, I wouldn't stress too much about that. Some people just aren't super verbal when it comes to expressing their feelings, you know? Just because she's not dropping the "I love you" bombs doesn't necessarily mean she's less invested than you.

The fact that she seems happy to see you and is physically affectionate is a good sign. Not everyone communicates the same way - some people show their feelings more through actions than words. As long as she's engaged and enjoying your time together, that's what really matters.

I've definitely been in relationships where the other person wasn't as vocal about their feelings. It can be a little tricky at first, but as long as you feel like there's a genuine connection and she's making an effort, it can definitely work out. You just have to be understanding of her communication style.

The key is to not read too much into it or make assumptions. Have you tried talking to her about it? Let her know that you appreciate when she says those things, but make it clear you don't need constant reassurance. See if you can find a middle ground.

Overall, I wouldn't worry too much, dude. If everything else seems good in the relationship, I'm sure she cares about you a lot, even if she's not yelling it from the rooftops. Just focus on enjoying each other's company and see where things go. As long as you're both happy, that's what counts.

[itsannalee]

I said i “i love you”, to my boyfriend after a year in relationship. Because i was too afraid to love someone. When he said i love you, i used always answer
“I like you, but i don’t love you yet”. I asked him to give me time. I was waiting until I feel like I can trust him enough.

[Asker]

Did it feel strange for you when he said it? Were you happy, or did you just feel nothing when he said it to you? I don’t want to make her uncomfortable...

(She never said it bothers her and I never asked it.)

[itsannalee]

I felt uncomfortable, because I didn’t know how to say it back. Like i didn’t want to love someone yet, but i also didn’t want to hurt his feelings, or make him think that i just play with him.

[Asker]

Thank you very much! I'll try to say it less then while she is not verbally about this :<

[Flower7]

Three months seems too soon for you to be telling her that you love her.

[Asker]

Thank you! I’m not trying to argue, but I’d like to ask: when do you think it’s okay to say “I love you” in a relationship? I have strong feelings for her and want to get this right.

To clarify, I’d like to correct my original post: we’ve been in a serious, exclusive relationship for 3 months. Before that, we were dating for about 6 months, and we’ve known each other for nearly a year.

In my previous relationship, my ex would end every letter or text with “Love you, XYZ” as soon as we became exclusive. That set a certain precedent in my mind, but I understand that every relationship is different.

In this current relationship, I started saying “I love you” about 2 months after we became exclusive. However, I’ve mostly said it in moments where she’s apologizing for something. For instance, I’d respond with: “Don’t worry about it. I hope you know and feel that I love you, it’s not a problem.”

What are your thoughts on this? Does this approach seem okay, or should I rethink how I’m expressing myself?

[Flower7]

Maybe you should stop saying that to her since she never says it back. Try waiting until she says it first.