Sexual assault is NEVER the girl’s fault. (When it happens to a female, likewise with a guy but I’ve seen many boys victim blaming)
It is NEVER EVER the victim’s fault. Putting an arm around someone you care about doesn’t mean you have consented to a finger down your pants.
Doesn’t matter what gender the person is! It’s a friend gesture and guys getting “confused” is their fault.
Stop using your penis as an excuse to touch girls in inappropriate ways. Grow the fuck up!
BULLSHITTTTTTT if you a HOE and choose to get drunk at a party and be a whore and then wake up feeling bad about or for yourself and call rape on the dude you were all for the night b4 in a drunken dripping wet stupor then well its ur fault. I had a friend back in college that i Witnessed 1st hand this happen to. He was even trying to be respectful and not mess around until they both got too drunk where after they fucked she went to puking and he held her hair after she threw up all over the dashboard and in the vents of his truck. He even took her home and the following morning and go hit in the mouth by her father that was mad and worried. But point is if you a hoe and doing it on purpose drunk or not then yes, yes it is your fault and you have no right to destroy an mans life and Reputation of your drunk ass bad decisions...
@kim45456 well thats all good and dandy but. dude in the night club was he 100% without the shadow of a doubt 100% sober and not provoking anything at all? if so why did he not defend himself. I am a firm believer of the 2nd amendment and sure guns in clubs normally ain't legal. i at all times even when i attend court have some way of defending myself and i do not expect anyone to feel bad for me if i fail to do so in a situation in should have. THE dude was raped by a GIRLFRIEND well sorry to break it to you he has legal right to say such thing and in the eyes of the law he is contradicting himself by doing so. TO BE IN A CONSENSUAL RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE SUCH AS A GIRLFRIEND how the fuck are you gonna say that they rape you if there is some sort of consent given by both parties? Dude in the locker room was he rapped by a guy or a girl? cause again why did he not defend himself yell scream start shitting on em idc do what it takes lol.
that was her fault. i totally agree. in a case like this i think the wiman should get a fair punishment
@Noshame21 Then we wonder why women sign up with girls forums instead of visiting this forum.
@kim45456 Thank you!
@bailey11 we need to ban him and report him to the ATF.
Never the victim's fault, the perpetrator must own their behaviour and actions. Conscious or subconscious, it is about power, anger, entitlement, disrespect, humiliation. Victim blaming is excusing this behaviour projecting the negativity of the perpetrator onto their victim. Is it not bad enough that the victim was degraded, debased, dehumanised during the attack? That they have to undergo stigma, judgement and scrutiny by those around them. In the end the victims, these women who are called slut, whore, bitch, are someone's mother, sister, daughter, aunt so before judging a victim, first think of the females in your life and think are they "asking for it" too?
i'm grateful bcs never had this, but i only often get sexual harassment and it really pisses me off and in the end i often keep my distance from the guy on the road, i want to cut his penis if i can so there is no such thing as this case again. hahaha
I'm sorry but if I walk around flashing money and then get mugged... its not my fault (no one should ever be mugged and they should be able to walk around showing money as much as they want) but I didn't look after myself very good.
Damn right you are. Huge swathes of women get hysterical and accuse good advice givers as ‘victim blaming’; is it really victim blaming if women are advised to not get drunk in public?, or dress modestly to minimise them being targeted? These silly girls just don’t want to accept that THEY alone are responsible for their personal safety and security.
@Lucky1974 YOU can't RAPE WOMEN PERIOD
Opinion
32Opinion
Is advising women to take measures to minimise the likely-hood of them being sexually assaulted ‘victim-blaming’?, or is such advice common-sense?, women in Britain regard such advice as being ‘victim-blaming’, that’s because they are IDIOTS. No one ever says that when they are advised by law-enforcement agencies to secure their home before leaving home as being ‘victim-blaming’ against burglars; therefore advising women to NOT get too drunk, or not wear too revealing clothes when going out to binge-drink is justifiable and common-sense. Take the following analogy: If you won a $50,000,000 lottery jackpot, you wouldn’t run out of your home waving your winning ticket declaring it to strangers in a public place, as in doing so you will be inviting a mugger to stab you and snatch your lottery ticket; in other words as adults our safety and security are OUR responsibility, WE have to take whatever preventive measures to minimise the likely-hood of us becoming targets for criminals; therefore advising women not to get too drunk, or advising them to dress reasonably modestly are common-sense personal safety precautions, NOT victim-blaming as mentally-retarded women think.
I like to think that most men wouldn’t commit rape, though I might be wrong? I agree that rape is never a victim’s fault; however I do believe that as adults (both men and women) our personal safety and security is solely OUR responsibility; if that means having to lock the windows and doors of our home, or avoid getting drunk in public then so be it; giving such advice is NOT victim blaming it is common sense. The opinions of some men on this topic are sickening.
These stats are way way higher than what they should be in western nations. These numbers are higher than that of times of war in African nations where soldiers go around raping women on mass.
I would have to see the original study and the definitions of sexual assault to take this piece even remotely seriously. It's statistics like this that promote the unfounded notion of a rape culture in the West.
Yes, it may not be the victims fault, but encouraging women to go out alone wearing highly revealing clothes, drinking in excess or inviting men back to there's with no intention of sleeping with them is a recipe for disaster.
Women need to be assertive in their choices. Especially when it comes to men, because they will try and get away with what ever they can, by not objecting you're giving non- verbal consent.
Most of what we say to each other is through body language, then tone of voice and then what we are actually saying.
This argument seem autistic. These no real understanding of how human beings work.
That's the narrative of a feminist. "Nothing you do influences people", but clothes do influence people whether you like it or not. If I were to wear the cultural garb of the middle east. People might think I'm muslim, but I might just like the attire. If I wear a Blues shirt people would assume I support that team.
The same is true when a women chooses to dress in sexually provocative way. It communicates to men that they are sexually interested and available for sex even if they're not. And if you're going to advertise you better be prepared to sell.
That never gives a man a right to rape a women, but you should be aware of the message you're communicating to others.
Again. I seriously need you to site these stats. Also why not define what rape is, because currently there is a confused definition of the term.
I would say rape is someone who is forced to have sex against their will.
So regret is not rape if both parties consented before hand, which is also sometimes said to be rape.
Again clothes communicate something to men that women seem to be unaware of. Men are sexually predatory by nature. Women are not, which is why sexual assault and rape are largely asymmetrical.
Yes, clothes may not be the only cause of a rape, but taken as a whole it might lead to it.
For instance is the women dressed in a provocative manner? is she drunk? Is she alone? Did she assertively reject his advances? Was he invited back to hers?
A women. Alone. In That state can easily be raped by a man. There are no witnesses and he can physically over power her.
I don't justify rape, but I don't encourage behavior that could lead to it either.
Women should conduct themselves in a manner that maximizes their safety around men, because once you are raped it can't be undone.
In the short term I may annoy or upset every girl on here, but at least I'm not giving advice to women that dramatically increases thier chances of being taken advantage of it such a dehumanizing way.
I am saying women should learn self defence and have weapons instead of changing their clothes. I know a man who justify a sexual harrassment by saying that the girl wear revealing clothes. You normalize that behaviour. We give predators reasons to do crime. And no man in right mind would rape someone. You can't compare a pyscho and a Normal thinking person
Yes, women should take all the precautions I have outlined as well as self-defense.
The number would be far lower if it we're only perpetrated by psychopaths, but far more men will rape a women than that, and if you were correct in your assertion that it we're only psychopaths. How is a women supposed to spot one? They can't. All the better to be safe than sorry.
There are countless men, typically male feninists, who will say anything to get in a women's knickers, and then become annoyed that they are not given sex for their kindness and loyalty.
If a women is isolated and alone. She is in danger. If she has a weapon. Great, but is she prepared to use it? Particularly on someone she knows?
Telling men to not rape is the same as telling people not to kill or steal. We all know it's wrong or against law. Yet people still do it.
Empower yourself, Kim. Men get to choose who they want to have sex with, but women decide who they have sex with. Don't give that up. Men need to be put in their place, and women have the the power to do so.
It is actually nearly so much as female rape victims but nobody talk about it and the number of female victims are exagerated by media. They show only female rape victims and invent the word "rape culture". Women dont often get raped. It is only the physchos who do that. I mean you have so many options to get laid, why rape. In my country prostitution is legal and very cheap.
Prison rape is almost entirely a male problem and is almost swept under the rug because they are male convicts. They don't need rights according to the media and government.
I wonder if your male friends were raped by men?
I actually have a lot of respect for sex workers. I'm guessing your Dutch if prostitution is legal?
Women in the sex industry that I have spoken to seem to have a very good understanding of male sexuality. Know how to deal with men, encourage, or discourage their advances, and are not triggered or upset by sexualized comments.
They have a firm understanding of what they are doing and how to conduct themselves outside of work.
Ultimately women need thier own safe spaces where they are free from the gaze of men. Women female bars or clubs where they can feel at ease and relax with other females, and then go out on the pull at mixed gendered places if they want to hook up. Of course men could have male only places where they can relax and be men without endangering any women.
It depends on the circumstances of the rape. Not all rapists are psychos and not all men are monsters, drinking makes people more violent and far more sexually aggressive. Yes, men do learn to control their urges most of the time, but men have far higher levels of testerone flowing through their bodies.
Women, experience a similar level when they are drunk, which is why women often become amorous, because they aren't used to that level of testosterone in their body, and have not learned to control themselves.
Men under the influence experience this elevation even more intensely, which is more likely to increase the chances of sexual assault. Rape is far less likely to occur, but still increases the risk.
Rape is typically a sexually motivated act. Except prison rape which is done to assert dominance.
Most men would not rape a women, but there are enough given the right opportunity that would who are not psychopaths.
It is not an excuse for such behavior, but a reality of what can happen when men lose control to their base instincts.
The original vampire books and werewolf novels are an exploration of men losing control of themselves and becoming beasts in the process. They lose their humanity, and secretly love and hate what they are. A tormented existence. A darkness that resides within all men. It is why women are the victims in those books and why the good and noble men are the ones that are prepared to kill such men, and protect those women.
Men can be very dangerous and harmful if their masculity isn't manifested in a healthy manner.
Instead of honour, bravery self sacrifice, and nobility. There is only violence, resentment and chaos.
Women have an inner darkness to if their feminity isn't exercised cotrectly, but it manifests differently.
You can for the most part, but it's just woman who are the ones most at risk when those harmful behaviors come out from men.
We all have darker sides to ourselves, but as long as we balance it with our lighter sides we become balanced healthy people.
The victim is never to blame, but we must still keep teaching people how to stay safe. Don't leave your drink unattended, try avoiding these parts of town as much as possible, always let someone know where you are, those aspects of life need to be a second nature. That doesn't mean that it's your fault if something DOES happen to you because you didn't take precautions, but it's still a stupid move. YOU are ultimately in charge of your own safety, society can only do so much.
Take care of yourself. Try to stop victim blaming by making sure that you don't BECOME a victim in the first place.
Everyone's responsible for their actions. More than one person can share blame. Its ALWAYS the rapist fault but if the victim went out at stupid times, with stupid people to stupid places and won a stupid prize, they had a role to play. We live in a dangerous world. You can't just pretend those dangers don't exist, do what you want and then act surprised and not at some level responsible for where you find yourself if your own choice predictably lead you into dangerous situation. And by the way many a times during real relationships consent is silent or implied be a giggle a smile or a come here look. Just saying
Watch me
Wow you really changed the world with this Take, bravo.
Too many rapists get away with their crimes, too many women don't get justice when it comes to these cases, you can't change much about it and you can't throw someone in jail when the only evidence you have is your memory.
You don't blame the predator for doing their hidden crimes, you blame the victim for being stupid, making themselves vulnerable, and not being careful.
Wear whatever tf you want, but don't come crying when something happens to you and you don't get justice, sympathy means nothing here so there's no reason to fish for it, you're not a child, having an "accepting" and "open" society does not protect you from such terrible things.
@kim45456 you clearly didn't try to understand what I said.
It doesn't matter whose fault it is after I get killed, the crime happened, it could've been prevented from my side but for some reason people think that pointing fingers of blame will solve the problem even though it keeps happening and even increasing.
I said it doesn't matter whose fault it is anymore, the crime is done, and if she can't get evidence to actually throw the guy in jail, then crying about it won't help.
I'm not blaming her, she might have not been wearing something slutty or shit like that, you're getting me wrong here, I'm encouraging women to be more careful and keep more safety measures in mind and make themselves much less vulnerable to such situations, not just to wear less skimpy clothes, but to also avoid being alone in public, avoid dark places, carry some sort of self defence, keeping a close friend close at all times, etc.
Like I said, pointing blaming fingers at the criminals isn't helping, the crime is happening just as often and not much is changing, so unless a miracle happens and all rapists in the world get the death they deserve, women will have to accept the cruel reality and be much more careful and aware.
Holy fuck
Are you reading what I'm saying?
Yeah but it doesn't mean I'm justifying it, I'm saying that it's sadly a fairly common thing in those areas and women should protect themselves and actually do something about it instead of blaming the rapists as that does nothing, of course rapists know what they're doing is wrong so they don't give a fuck.
I technically can't blame the rapists, they have commited a crime, they are automatically blamed by law, I don't get why people feel the need to blame the rapist by themselves.
Also even if I do blame the victim, it doesn't mean the criminal is innocent, like I said, guilty and blamed by the law.
It's like when you put the blame on a child for something bad they caused so they learn from their mistake, it's tough love.
But we are talkinh about rape. Blaming someone for that is extrem horrible and it would lead that person to suicide. Again try to help these people but never blame them. I dont understand why a person have to face consequences he/she does not deserve. It is never her/ his fault but is ok if you show them to protect themself
Nine out of ten times the girl is lying, and that statistic is from the police, meaning more have lied but realized their story was too weak before reaching that far.
We see this again and again, innocent men getting in trouble because of false accusations.
Furthermore, if you go with a guy between some trees to get it on then you should be sure before you go there with a horny guy. Otherwise it IS your fault.
I hate to say it but it’s true that some women lie about it. I’ve seen news reports about underage girls lying about their age to a guy who is over 18 that they had sex with which ultimately made him a sex offender. Another girl accused a guy of rape because she wanted a relationship with him and he didn’t so she decided to make false accusations to ruin his life.
You pulled those stats out of your butt. The FBI put the real number of false accusations at about 2-4%. I'm gonna go ahead and believe professional investigators over some internet guy who doesn't know what he's talking about and probably just read too many redpill articles. This is why most women don't come forward. Men like you already have it planted in their minds that most women are lying with absolutely zero evidence whatsoever. Just their feeeeeelings. A handful of women lie about it and suddenly it's the majority. Nice logic. Just because you hear a few stories doesn't mean it's an epidemic. It happens, but it's so rare people need to stop blowing it out of proportion. It's like worrying about getting bit by a shark while swimming in the river. It can happen, but rarely.
@kim I never raped anyone and I don't intend to.
@AyanA FBI is an organization full of politically biased people. My stats are from the police in another jurisdiction. Also, it matches what I and others have experienced (repeatedly) regarding attention hungry women. Maybe you don't get out among women much since you haven't noticed.
No I'm saying if you both made the choice then you should know what can happen if you say no. You should screen the guy before you take that chance.
And, while the guy might not seem nice for not stopping while exploding you're definitely not being nice either when you lured him in.
"Naked and spreading her legs is consent. We don't need to sign a contract or even speak the same language." Men like you are stupid enough and dont understand any body language but expect her to say no even though she shows him with her body language that she does not want him. You guys like if she does not say no even though she shows clearly with her crying and screaming, she consents.
Kim, both your inability to judge my I telligence correctly and your feminist views screams that it's you who's lacking upstairs. So maybe you shouldn't have brought that up.
And you don't get a right to kill people just because they're close to your intelligence level.
"Men like you are stupid enough and dont understand any body language" - How often do you get naked and spread your legs in front of guys without wanting them to fuck you? The word "stupid" doesn't work when you're not supporting that statement with logic and especially not when you at the same time show your inability to use your mind like a well developed human.
No, men don't expect her to say no but a lot of women like say no and not mean it.
Your argument about men spreading their legs is also flawed as theyre obviously not naked like you apparently are. And I think there's something you haven't learned about male anatomy.
Which color is your hair?
" How often do you get naked and spread your legs in front of guys without wanting them to fuck you? The word "stupid" doesn't work when you're not supporting that statement with logic and especially not when you at the same time show your inability to use your mind like a well developed human." You know what i mean. You does not have to spread your legs. I mean if being nude is consent, then nude beaches would turn into sex places. I mean if she walks nude and sit spreading her legs while you are in front of her without her noticing you, you can touch.
"No, men don't expect her to say no but a lot of women like say no and not mean it." -sorry then, but i have been told by dome thst they dont understand it
"You know what i mean." - Yes and it's stupid.
"You does not have to spread your legs." - How can you be 20 years old and still not understand male anatomy?
"I mean if being nude is consent" - That's not what you said before and not what I was referring to. You said you were naked and spreading your legs in front of guys. I don't know if this is your silly mind thinking you can get away with twisting the words or just your silly mind not knowing what's being said.
"I mean if she walks nude and sit spreading her legs while you are in front of her without her noticing you" - It's too late to change it now but good to see someone talked some sense into you.
If you walk around in public naked you're pretty much asking for it anyway though.
"You know what i mean." - Yes and it's stupid.
"You does not have to spread your legs." - How can you be 20 years old and still not understand male anatomy?
""I mean if being nude is consent" - That's not what you said before and not what I was referring to. You said you were naked and spreading your legs in front of guys." Being nude is NOT a consent you said it is
" How can you be 20 years old and still not understand male anatomy" then why do i have to cover my breasts although it is unhealthy? . Your breats need to exhale too and wearing bra only cause unnecassary pain
""I mean if being nude is consent" - AGAIN BEING NUDE IS NOT A CONSENT
@Manlyman1 You are talking about the 90% of the 2% of fake cases splashed on social media. Also, I think you are confusing the liars with the real victims. Rape doesn’t usually occur when a women is naked out in front of you (although it can) it usually takes place when she/ he is very vulnerable, unaware someone is watching them, and/ or intoxicated.
Women still need to be situationally aware. Not because I think they deserve sexually assault at all but because unfortunately rapists exist and they could be your boyfriend, a cute guy at the party, or a stranger. Women can and should do and wear what they want, but be smart. Watch your drink so no one ruffies it, take pepper spray, etc. We can’t change the alarming number of rapists in the country but we can change the number of victims by being smarter than them.
I really wish the number of rapists would go down. Honestly, I have so many friends who have gone through this and yet men still think it’s ok because they aren’t getting caught.
Just something to think about.
@Manlman1
"If you walk around in public naked you're pretty much asking for it anyway though." If you say something like that, you expect me to shut up? You clearly saying tthat a rapist have a right to rape naked woman. Dont whine if you get raped by gays for being topless/ wearing revealing clothes and spreading your legs after all you ask it for it. Bye Potential rapist
What you were too dumb to understand is I didn't mention myself there. Dumb people often assume a lot of things.
Also since you keep spamming I have decided to block you. I'm new at this so it might not work. Lucky you. I read elsewhere how you like to block people who tells you things that makes you cry so I'm sure you'll be fine with this. I find you rather uninteresting anyway.
- I agree, it's never victims fault, true, a man can also be a victim of rape.
- The definition is 100% correct, unlike the one used in UK.
- Also, rape can be about sex, if the attacker is a sex addict, or has extremely high sex drive (satyriasis, nymphomania), or if it's a desperate and sexually deprived person.
- Indeed, there is no justification in claiming that the victim was "teasing the rapist by wearing revealing clothes", that's just nonsense.
Fantastic mytake, keep it up 👍
Daniel Sloss: X has a fabulous take on it.. Namely that men have to get involved and both speak to women to understand better and also to the men surrounding them to help prevent it.. Personally, as someone who knows far too many who've endured and survived the travesty of being taken advantage of, I feel the importance of his message and plan to take feasible action. Nothing is okay about letting it happen if you can help in any way. Support is also integral for the victims of this heinous act.
Yupp.. It is to up to the person to decide what they want to wear and how they want to be.. even if they are nude and walking naked.. you have no right to harrass them or humiliate them or forcefully touch them... you shouldn't force anything on a person that they don't want..
I agree men have become to desperate and need to avoid women more. The amount of pathetic men who catcall women and think they can just touch women and randomly compliment women and out women on pedestals is embarrassing and pathetic and should be shamed
I would totally agree with you if it wasn't for the increase of false rape accusations by girls to guys.
Like are you retarded or something? They know they're usually the victims but yet they do shitty stuff like that?
Honestly, I just feel sorry for the innocent people (Male and female) and y'all crazy motherfuckers and bitches can go to hell for all I care
What increase? The FBI still has the percentage at 4%.
From what year?
That is true. And if I get drunk in the city and someone knocks me down and takes my wallet, it is not my fault, it is theirs for doing such an illegal act.
But that doesn't mean it wasn't pretty stupid of me to get drunk and wander around a bad part of town...
After reading all of the comments, whatever happened to respecting each other as human beings? Get back to basics and keep our hands to ourselves. How about that? When did that fall by the wayside?
Very few women are actually raped. Almost all rapes are non-rapes that are defined as rape such as buying a girl a drink and then having sex or she changes her mind after the fact. Women know it is highly unlikely that they will be forcibly raped. Otherwise, they wouldn't dress and act like sluts.
@kim45456 If women thought they would be raped because of what they wear, they would be afraid and wouldn't do it. A prime example is Sweden where one in Four Women Are Afraid to Leave Their Homes in Fear of Being Assaulted by Migrants. humansarefree.com/.../...-women-are-afraid-to.html
True. But people are innocent until proven guilty. Some cases that have come to light have more going than a girl aledgely been interfeared with. Automatically fall into two camps, he's guilty as hell , or she probably lead him on. Problem with the US way is by the TV channels, picking up dirt on both sides. When it comes to court the waters of truth are so mudded the truth is hard to see
And it doesn't matter what "part of town" we're at, what we wear, etc. - as it says in "Are Men the Weaker Sex", free from Smashwords.
It has to do with the perpetrator and whether he has an opportunity to assault, abuse, take advantage of, etc.
I bet most guys wouldn't rape someone (which is a crime) if a woman police officer was standing next to him!
If you are alone, dressed like a slut, trippin off drugs, hanging out at a skeevey hotel and pass out in a party room... that would absolutely be your fault just as much as whatever man does something to you. Everyone knows you would absolutely be raped in that situation common fucking sense.
you csnt say never. you can say someone never deserves it. sometumes it is the victims fault. they put themselves in a position knowing it can happrn. dont go getting my words twisted im just keeping it real.
I had 4 years of counseling and a tucked up life to deal with this all. All the while my rapist is engaged and seems happy which isn’t fair
And just remember to automatically assume the girl is lying because many do. If it was true there would be actual physical evidence (signs of s struggle like other crimes).
Believing someone with no evidence is VERY stupid and sexist.
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