Shy guys, am I wasting my time? Should I back off?

I've been trying. Initiating, flirting, talking, smiling. I think we have gone in some direction. I mean, he does give me his full attention and he will touch me and look at me, even say hi on his own sometimes. I just feel a little down. He expects me to do everything, including coming over there to see him (driving to his town not too far away). He even said 'Next time you come...' And I don't know if I should back off and not come as often? He's not doing much to help and he hasn't actually accepted an invite to hang out yet. He doesn't say no exactly which is completely frustrating but he won't accept and I have asked twice now. So maybe backing off and him seeing my world doesn't revolve around him will help? He's mid twenties, out of college and working if that makes any difference. I work too, which is why I am feeling a little down. It seems my time is being wasted. We've been 'friends' for 6 months now.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well seeing as your both now in a relationship you have no commitment to him but honestly i would ask him instead if he wants to hang-out some place in public, if he declines that too then he's not being shy... he might just be messing you about, don't let him take you for granted... and don't EVER go to a guys house when you don't fully know him because they could just be wanting to sleep with you, don't mix shyness with a guy just wanting to sleep with you because mostly when guys just want sex they will emotionally keep their distance and wouldn't treat you in a way where he wants you to have feelings for him. So ask him to hang out some where and if he declines and still expects you to go to his every time just tell him no... if he wants to see you he has to come to you too, 50/50 effort, if he declines that too and insists to go to this, run... lol.

    • I realize you already asked him twice and he said no (which gets me suspicious lol (, if he doesn't say yes again then don't go over, be honest with him and say it's not fair and well... note that you shouldn't of gone to his before you actually knew him properly anyways and see what his response is.

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    • Thankies for MHO :)

    • No prob.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Does he like you?

    • I don't know! I'm not a mind reader!

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    • You're not stupid; you're hoping that he likes you. Why don't you just save time and tell him how you feel. If he doesn't react, you can have closure and move on.

    • Too scared too. I've been told I'm not very pretty and other such mean things before by guys. Although most didn't actually say it to my face.

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