Most of the guys I like or whom every girl is after in my area are just toned like so or even less toned than this:
The buff guys who have no substance, and even the ones who have substance but are arrogant and show off, receive minimal attention. The most important thing physically about a guy to a girl is the FACE and the HAIR, and just not being overweight (and even that varies from girl to girl)
Why do guys think they have to be buff to be attractive?
Both men AND women have ideas in their head as to what the opposite sex finds attractive. Both are usually wrong. That's because people tend to get those ideas from the media and people who are the same gender as them.
Which is dumb. Because if you don't know something (what the opposite gender finds attractive) then it makes way more sense to go to the source (people of the opposite gender) than other outside sources (people of the same gender).
So you know what results from people going to outside sources to figure out what's "attractive" and what's not? Guys going around bragging about how they can lift 600 lbs (newsflash, we don't give a crap) and girls going around claiming guys like "curves" while lounging on the couch eating twice their weight in cheetos (newsflash, those aren't the type of curves guys are talking about).
... just like girls think they have to be thin, curvy and fit to be attractive.
it's not just about their own mindset. it's societal norms that control ideals of attractiveness and therefore, how noticed you are by the opposite sex.
Cause usually when the say "DAAAAMN that guy's hot!!!" it's usually directed to a guy that has lots of muscles. Example: Hugh Jackman as Wolverine. Every girl I've met has said that he has an amazing body, if not the perfect body. Also when they post pictures of guys they find hot it's a guy that's ripped.
That's why many of us assume that we have to be ripped to be considered hot, cause many of us are tired of just being considered cute and seeing girls going for the hot guy with muscles. My body is pretty much similar to the guy you posted, if not identical, and most girls have told me that it'll be good if I got a little more muscles.
I understand. But which guys are the girls actually dating? Women don't want to date a guy who is more attractive than herself. Her job is to be the attractive one. https://theodysseyonline.com/clemson/dad-bod/97484
So you're telling me that a girl will never date someone more attractive than her? So women are always the settlers and the men are the reachers? I don't think that's true, I've seen many guys that are more attractive than their girlfriends.
No I'm not saying that's how it is in all cases. I'm saying that girls may marvel over guys who are hunks but often date regular looking guys who aren't super buff. Look up Pewdie Pie on Youtube and then look at his girlfriend.
But why would they drool over a guy if then they don't wanna date a guy like that? Why settle for someone "less attractive" than you, if you can get the one you really want? I don't get it :S
Because its not settling for girls. We value good looks, but not nearly as much as guys. So a guy dating a girl he doesn't think is that pretty might feel like he's settling, but for women its different: Here is a list (from Hookingupsmart. com) of key attraction triggers women experience in mating (in no particular order):
Social status Age Ambition and industriousness Dependability and stability Intelligence Compatibility Size and strength Good health (good looks are the key indicator of this) Ability to demonstrate love and commitment
Hmmm ok. It's just that your first comment when you said "Women don't want to date a guy who is more attractive than herself. Her job is to be the attractive one." just confused me, it made me think that even if that's the guy she truly wants, even if he has everything she wants in a guy, she won't date him cause he's more attractive than her.
Oh! I'm sorry about that. However if you look around you'll notice that many beautiful women are with ugly/average guys. Maybe I generalized or used a fallacy but typically the girl is better-looking than the guy. I don't think she purposely chooses someone less attractive than herself in all cases. I know however, that it is uncomfortable approaching a guy I deem more physically attractive than myself, and I would need a lot of reassurance that he values me as a person and won't trade me in for someone prettier before I go into a relationship with him.
Simple science of attraction. Women want men, not males that either look like little boys, or other women. A nice body is a symbol for hard work, wether it be a guy with toned legs because he plays soccer all day or a guy with a built back because he's been cutting trees to pay the bills. Hard work is what women go after, and a nice strong body is sending subliminal messages like, "yeah, I do things".
These are guys who don't lift. I'm a big guy and have been lifting for 4 years naturally. I don't lift for girls but they surely give me a lot more attention then when I looked 120 lbs like the picture above. Your probably intimbidating by guys like me so you insult them behind their backs. Then guys say that's too bulky.. I don't think I'd want to ever look like that. I turn around and respond and say good you never will. I put in work and I look fricken great. Don't hate on my lifestyle because I don't hate on yours.
Of course I'm not hating on you. Its admirable. I'm just saying that being muscular in itself and promoting that won't get you the girl. Its so much more to it like just being confident and humble. That's all. A lot of guys have it in their heads that if they just get buff the girls will chase them... and I've seen many disappointed to find that isn't the case.
No I'm not denying that. I'm just saying there are several guys I know who are super muscular, but don't get girls. Muscles are important in attracting girls, but they're probably like number 20 on the list of things girls look for.
Why is it that I never got any attention before I lifted.. I was just an average guy who girls paid no time to. I walk in a room and it's an awkward hey what's up. Started lifting a year later I walk in and everyone is greeting me. Asking me what I'm doing later. Working out getting muscle and being healthy makes you more attractive. Why is it my IG went from 200 followers to 2.4k? My results speak for themselves. I feel like a muscular guy fucked you over and now your bitter and insecure towards them.
Alright , I accept that. No lol, a muscular guy has not messed with my heart. But I've seen many of this Bahamian island's 10/10 girls going after guys who had status, power, wealth, confidence, or athleticism and many of them are not buff. So I was just observing that you don't have to be buff to get a high value girl. You just have to have a number of other things going for you. But I'm glad its been working out for you.
OK ahah. You seem civil minded just want to through my opinions out there. You mind answering my question? I have to admit I did lose my. muscle during the academy and thought this could of been why. You'll underdtand once you read the question
I read your question but was really confused as to what was going on, and don't know how to reply. Basically it seems like she realized you didn't love her and was ready to move on. Which you should be okay with, because you admit to rarely complimenting her and mostly just sleeping with her.
I mean. Like I said at the end she really pushed me away and I felt like I was initiating too much. I thought me offering to live with her etc was enough to show that I love her. I get insecure about it thinking she left me for someone else but I just wanted someone else's outside unbiased opinion
Well here's the kicker I don't train to be attractive to women I train because I want to be bigger, stronger, faster and healthier.
This is my goal and every guy I know trains for himself not for others, if others like what we have well that is just a bonus, but we train to be the best we can be. www.muscleforlife.com/.../...tthews.jpg&w=640&q=85
Probably because guys with big muscles are portrayed as the hero in most Hollywood movies. Why compare them to muscular guys with no substance and arrogance? Why not compare both bodies equally? It sounds like you think large muscles usually imply a undesirable personality.
No, I don't. I just think large muscles should not be the only means of getting a girl. Similar to how girls who don't have perfect Nicki Minaj butts still get the top guys, guys wo aren't buff like Wolverine still get the top girls.
Oh I've never heard of a person thinking big muscles is the only way to get a girl. From what I understand must girls aren't physically attracted to large muscles. I don't find Nicki Minaj's butt remotely attractive by the way. Do you have a preference on amount of muscle?
I like muscles exactly how yours are in your picture. And also like Jay Alvarrez. That's what most girls like -- toned but not bulging. And believe it or not, some guys think that their muscular build will cause them to win girls but it doesn't.
Oh man , you're gonna be making some guy really mad lol Anyway , why guys become well... mass monsters ain't really doing it for girls. It's a sort of male competitiveness between guys.
Anyway , gosh he has a really long torso doesn't he lol... or is it just because he's dropping his pants REALLLLLY low lol
Guys who lift for women strive for that physique, though. Most people who ask those questions are a lot smaller than Francisco and have something called Body Dysmorphic Disorder.
The guys you see who are pushing 180lbs - 200lbs are the ones that lift for themselves, and end up attracting women vs lifting for women in the hopes of attracting women.
Nah, buff isn't really desirable and it isn't even a sign of being fit, I am working towards slightly broad shoulders (not too much but just enough to be broad) and a lean waist and toned limbs etc, basically decent athletic shape in all muscles, and to be honest, face too doesn't matter too much until and unless the guy looks like tom cruise which almost every guy isn't and neither are most girls walking aphrodites.
I wanna be ripped cause I think it looks awesome plus the capabilities ur body begins to possess r incredible. I don't know how to describe it. It's just a gr8 lifestyle to strive after.
Well, I didn't say all guys think like that. But the ones that do really have strong convictions that their muscles will get them girls, and I'm just like no.
lol, once you're confident, have a nice face, and are someone great. Bill Gates nor Mark Zuckerburg are toned and I imagine they have no problem getting women.
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