Is it a bad sign if a guy asks to hang out last minute and later at night?

[Puppylove94]

I work right next to his apt and he always asks me when i'm at work what time i'll get off and if i want to come over afterwards. He's getting his doctorate right now so he is literally always doing school work and says that's why he can never hang out. Then he tries to make time for me after he is done studying, which is why it's usually later. The problem is he has never really taken me on a date or planned to hang out even a day in advance. He's going back home for 2 weeks for his break and said he thinks he'll have more time when he gets back.

my friends keep telling me that the reason why he keeps asking me to hang out last minute is cause he doesn't take me seriously and thinks i'm just a hook up?

[Anonymous]

Being too busy is an excuse and it's used often because it works on many. If he doesn't have the time to date then he shouldn't. Sounds like he using you being close by as a great excuse to get you over because it's convenient. If a guy wants to truly get your know you and date you he will go above and beyond to make that happen. To me, this sounds like his lazy attempt to get you over. Always trust your instincts as well, they're never wrong. If you're feeling unsure then there is a reason for it.

[madhatters4]

it's hard to say but even if you do hang out last minute and late in the evening you don't have to do anything you don't want to do and you could somehow find a way to mention that to him before hanging out

i guess if you are feeling uncertain about his intentions then it's best to trust your gut

[MaLifeBeLikeOooAaah]

Looks like he wants some!

[MaLifeBeLikeOooAaah]

"Thanks for MHO :) "

[abw121290]

I think that it's a cause for concern. When a guy reaches out at the last minute and you're not really dating or seeing each other, he is looking at it purely as a physical thing.

Have you hooked up with him?

[Puppylove94]

well the first night we went a little to far.. but nothing too bad, just hand stuff. the other times we've hung out its just been kissing. i told him i was uncomfortable with how fast we went the first night.

[abw121290]

Yeah.. I hate to say it, but I think he is looking at you as simply a hook up, and I think to a certain extent you know that too, by telling him that you were uncomfortable with how far things went the first night

[Puppylove94]

even if he hasn't pushed anything since? and he even told me he doesn't look for flings.. he's more into relationships.

[abw121290]

Maybe he is different.. But I think he is looking for something much more causal. Just my honest opinion.

[Puppylove94]

alright, thank you. i appreciate it

[abw121290]

Good luck !

[pierre7i]

It isn't necessarily a bad sign... a doctorate is a very big deal, and reuires a huge amount of study so it could be he genuinely is focusing on that.

Do you want to be in a relationship with him?

[pierre7i]

If you do (want to be in a relationship with him) it might make sense to ask him over for dinner, in advance so he can plan around it... if he says yes, cook something delicious, have some nice wine and dress in something pretty... you might just win his heart :-)

[martyfellow]

Yes, I also think he just hopes for a one-time affair, or he would be able to make time in his schedule, somehow.

[Fearless_banana]

Homeboy is working on his doctorate.. that's at least blowjob worthy..

[Puppylove94]

lol... negative. there is no way i would give my first blow job to someone i'm not in a relationship with.

[Fearless_banana]

Alright dude at least give him a rough handy. Shit.

[Puppylove94]

wouldn't that make it even more of a hook up? that's what i don't want

[Anonymous]

Damn, you're way too hot to be just a booty call. You must enjoy it though, so... you go gurrrrl

[Puppylove94]

i dont want to be a booty call... lol thats why im asking this question. i can't tell if i am or not

[Opinion Owner]

Oh, you definitely are. No offense, but you must not be very bright. He sees that and is exploiting it.

[Puppylove94]

its actually called optimism and he's leading me on. it has nothing to do with intelligence. thanks tho.

[Opinion Owner]

Intelligent and Bright... Not the same thing.

[Anonymous]

He wants to sample your flower after that it might be smooth sailing or it will just end up as a fling 😂😂😂😂🚕🚕🚕🚕

[Anonymous]

Yes it is

[Puppylove94]

why?

[Opinion Owner]

Could be a booty call