What did she mean by "lets be friends first"?

[Anonymous]

Any advice and opinions you have would be greatly appreciated.

Last night I finally got courage to tell the girl I like that I was interested in her. And her response was "I don't know, lets be friends first." But the thing is I've spent a large portion of the last quarter tutoring/studying with her and have even gone out to lunch/dinner with her and her friends. Which made me believe that we were already friends. And to make sure what she was I was on the same page as her I asked iff she meant that she wanted to hang out as friends more and get to know each other better first? To which she replied, "Yes".

Was she just being nice and trying to let me down easy without an outright rejection? Or is there a chance that she really does want to get to know me better first? What do you all think? And any advice on how to find out or determine which it is?

[Anonymous]

Believe it or not, girls aren't the cold hearted bitches people make them out to be. Haha

Obviously she likes you as a friend or else she wouldn't be hanging out with you, but when she said "Let's be friends first" she was rejecting you in as nice a way as she could, because she doesn't want to ruin your friendship. Attraction doesn't slowly develop over getting to know someone better, it is instant, and what you need to do is date other women to let her know you're fine with being her friend, and a few months down the road, try flirting with her and getting her sexually attracted BEFORE you tell her you like her.

[Anonymous]

Do this. Keep getting to know her and then if after 6 months you ask her out again and she still doesn't feel comfortable going out with you or comes up with another excuse then start asking out other women. If it looks like she is getting jealous of you seeing other people then the next move will be up to you.

[Anonymous]

I've done that before too and honest I was just being nice as well because I felt bad. If you had just met the girl it might be different. For women sometimes attraction which is not initially there grows when a friendship develops. But she knows you well enough and it seems she probably is just not into you that way, but does care about you so she does not want to hurt your feelings. What I would do is stop pursuing her. You have put your feelings out there. If she's interested she will come after you if not then I would just let it go and move on.

[Andy2221]

in reality u womans don't care about us. let's be real and honest since that's what most of u womans wants a real honest man in your life okay let's be real in reality u never loved us stop the cap u womans r capping

[darlanoy0510]

If I am in into someone and he asks me out, I would say yes. If she pulls the friend thing, I'm sorry but she doesn't have a feeling for you. She just being nice by saying just be friend first because she hopes that she would develop some kind of feeling for you. I don't know if you want to wait around for her because you might miss an opportunity with another girls.

[deuxx]

I think she either said it because she isn't interested in you that way but didn't want to be mean about it. Or she didn't consider you a FRIEND friend, just an acquaintance of sorts but she wants to spend some more time with you to get to know you a bit more and then see how things work out. Try go out with her more and see what happens x

[ALWAYSclassy]

I've done that before when I wanted to be nice and didn't want to reject him.

[Andy2221]

u womans got to stop being nice and let the real u out, cuz us men will still think that we still got a chance with u so i suggest u womans stop with the nice act and just say no.