"I'm not looking for anything serious" What does that mean to you?

[NotSoBad]

"I'm not looking for anything serious at the moment"

I've been making it a point to tell this to the girls I've been dating.

What does this mean to you when you say it?

What does this mean to you when you hear it?

How do you respond to this statement?

How do you expect another person to respond to it?

If someone isn't "looking for anything serious" where do you draw the line? Hugging? Kissing? Oral Sex? Sex?

[Anonymous]

Now, I am a guy, and I was recently told this by a girl I've been having out with/having sex with. We hang out, and occasionally go to each other's family events such as sports games, etc. However, she told me that she doesn't need anything serious at the moment.. I of course was hurt but I didn't show it. Here's the situation, where it gets a little tricky.
She was dating an older guy (6 years older) she was 17 he was 23. Now, I see this as a problem as I'm sure most of you do, but this is the thing: she says she was in love with him and they were going to become serious once she turned 18. He died in a motorcycle accident a few months before she turned 18. He got her pregnant a few months before that by accident and she had an abortion.
SO after hearing all of this AFTER I started hanging out with her, I didn't mind because she seemed very normal and emotionally stable for a highschooler in love with her dead pedophile boyfriend. But so we are hanging out and we cuddle and hang out with each others families just like a boyfriend/girlfriend would, but she claims she "doesn't want anything serious"... What am I missing?

[lovelust89]

Hey I’m in the same boat right now. Care to chat?

[Anonymous]

Well it depends really. I say that on my pof account and to chicks that I like just so there's no pressure. Gives s chance to get to know eachother. Myself personally had a girl tell me that right off the hop on pof and I told her that's fine lets just get to know eachother. We talked for two weeks and exchanged countless messages. We would flirt but never openly send interest but we both knew we were. We went out for a date and it went so amazing. I hugged and kissed her lightly on the lips. she texted me 20 minutes after thanking me for the lovely evening and we've got a second date. My point is people can say that as to see who's serious about you and who's not.

[G-4-Gorge]

I had the same thought that they say this to eliminate any pressure. A guy I've been hooking up with said this to me but somehow I feel like he's not completely being honest with himself and confused as to what he wants seeing as though he still invited me to meet his best friend, talking about places to go, going to one of his main events etc. but anyway, when you say "people can say that to see who's serious about you and who's not" how does someone that's serious about you respond to that exactly?

[Anonymous-24]

It depends on how long you have been seeing the person. If a guy says that to me when I first meet them I take it to mean that the guy isn't into me enough to want a relationship, but they're still trying to keep it open to attempt to get laid. If it's someone I've been seeing for awhile I would probably take it a little more offensively, like ok so why have we been hanging out? As a guy, I say that as far as physical stuff you should draw the line at whatever the girl is comfortable with (that's if she sticks around- a lot of girls probably won't). When I hear something like this, sorry to tell you, but I just take it as an excuse. Guys tend to make excuses when their not into girls. Truth be told, if a guy meets a girl that he's crazy for he would not hold her off because he doesn't want anything serious---he would go the distance.

[NotSoBad]

I don't know... I just started dating and I'm not really interested in being committed to one person. There are so many people out there and I'd like to meet a few.

[jasmine-me91]

Not ready for a real relationship

Someone who is not interested in making a real relationship or is more concerned with just hanging out

Its irritating to me personally

Depending who your dealing with( if the person is really in to you) that person might get mad

I would draw the line at kissing, oral sex, sex, and hugging (because the way you hugg someone can be a sign of flirting)

[Caramel]

If I Say it it would mean , I'm not at all interested in you!

If I Hear it , it means the person is really not into me

you answer: Good for you cause I wasn't looking either!

I expect : Ok well can we at least talk sometimes?

I think it means really like I just wanna hang out and if I meet someone better in the meantime I am OUT!

[Inkweaver2]

If someone isn't serious I draw the line before the beginning. I take it as meaning that the person doesn't really doesn't care much about me, and definitely doesn't love me. It means to me the person is just in the relationship for fun and that is it. Not the kind of person I personally want to be with.

[LoveYourself17]

It means to me that the person is not looking for a committed relationship, nothing long-term. I will respond by asking for clarification - "what are you looking for then?" Depending on the person, I expect the person to give me an honest answer. Again in regards to drawing the line, it all depends on the two people who are involved. Where I would draw the line depends on the kind of person she is. But probably would draw the line at kissing, oral sex, and sex.

[Chany77]

Basically it means you're only useful for sex. But not enough to invest feelings into.