What does "I'm not looking for anything" mean?

[centrestriker]

I met this girl like last week. Really cool, we danced, we kissed a little bit. She gave me her number. The next day I called her and asked her if she wanted to go out, both of us were busy until tonight so we set the date for tonight. Then randomly last night we both ended up at the same party. She tracked me down and we danced and made out abit. Tonight we met up and went to a trendy little martini place downtown. Each of had a drink and split some calamari. afterward, she told me that she "isn't looking for anything and feels bad for leading me on"... WTF does that mean? Any way about 20min later, I walked her to her car. And she kisses me. Not once, but several times. I am so confused right now. Any idea what's going on? Am I wasting my time? Or does this girl actually like me?

[Spiceyhot]

I got the same thing from a guy who I was seeing that changed his mind so many times with me and we were exclusive and I basically told him I want to be with him and we can go at his pace or we can just have sex and see each other. when he texted previously that he is sorry he led me on but doesn't want anything right now. Please respect that thanks. But he was the one who looked for me when we had a fight and he blocked me because I asked him for clarity if he doesn't want me and if he wants to puruse other women or not, and I went a bit too harsh on him. He resurfaced and tried to see me and I said that while I'm hurt I am horny (which I am absolutely sexually attracted to him like crazy and vice versa) but then he gets conflicted and weird says that he's broken due to his divorce but if things change he will reach out then reaches out and asks me if I still want him, then said he isn't used to casual, then says back and forth and says that I pursue him for sex. I told him he projects on me and that he was the one that asked me for a relationship and the we just had crazy, amazing sex and he said I am his kryptonite and acted crazy. This has gone on for 8-9 months, recently I had not seen him for 3 months and the past month he tried to see me until he did this and blocked me again.

[imsocold25]

That's how some girls act ...it sounds like she wants to have sex with you but doesn't want to come off to easy so she wants you to kinda go after her a little bit by turnin you down but still leavin enough to keep you around

[JackWSmith]

Are you serious? If I heard that, I'd think "Oh she doesn't find me attractive, not enough to date anyway. It's no big deal," and move on. She could accomplish the same thing by waking him wait for sex.

[imsocold25]

How would you get that out of it?not all girls want to be in a relationship. Y can't she just not be ready for one and still want to keep him around for sex it doesn't sound good but I'm sure its been done b4...not something ill do but it happens

[JackWSmith]

I guess because "I'm not looking for anything right now," is one of those euphemisms women use for not being attracted like "My life is really complicated right now," and "I just got out of a really bad relationship" or "I'm just focusing on myself right now." My interpretation of any of those phrases is that she's not interested and she's trying to be nice.

[centrestriker]

lol, you girls are complicated, I kind of thought along the lines of JackWSmith, that is until she started kissing me again... then at which point I had no idea, what going on, but thanks everyone this scenario makes a lot more sense. I'll just see what happens I suppose.

[Spiceyhot]

@JackWSmith I read on reddit that if there is not attachment included such as, "for right now", "if my situation changes I will reach out", "I need time to think about my feelings", "I need space now."... it's different than "I'm not looking for anything (without a detachment).

[ImALuvrNotAFighter]

When she kisses you, that's a good thing. When she tells you "I'm not looking for anything," that's a REALLY bad sign. Inconsistent behavior could mean that she either has low interest or she doesn't really know what she wants. Try asking her out on a second date; if she turns you down or acts really inconsistent on the date, it's probably time to move on.

[NonchalantBro]

probably just wants to hook up... the "leading on" comment may be referring to guys getting the impression that she wants a relationship.

[conniejbaby]

The whole "isn't looking for anything" means friends or friends-with-benefits.

[imsocold25]

If she was tryin to be nice y would she kiss him and f*** with his head...he turn her on

[Spiceyhot]

I think in my case, he wants more but doesn't like to be vulnerable. I offered both, and he also kept on saying before when we had mini breaks that if his circumstances change he will reach out or he would say for "right now" but he will reach out after reevaluating. LOL. He reaches out, then I get annoyed by some things and then he projects like it's me when I gave him the choice we are not "friends" he has made this clear because we have sex all the time and the sex is really hot so I gave him both opportunities but he wants more however said that he has been detached about relationships since his divorce and doesn't know why. He said he's not in the headspace to date nor have relationships but he likes seeing me. He said also that he didn't think he was ready to date but enjoys seeing me but then feels bad after and says these things then comes back and tries.

[Spiceyhot]

@imsocold25 I think she was testing him, in my case it's the same maybe they want to be with them but not ready to commit exactly. Friends dont' have sex and friends with benefits are less emotionally driven so there is less back and forth.