Why have a side chick? I'm really confused?

[Anonymous]

This man dated my friend before he got engaged and married and continued to date her. When I talk to her she says she doesn't care if he is married because clearly he doesn't?

Why do men have side chicks? Why not just have the side chick as the main?

[eanfoso]

Easy, there's no greater scene of power than being able to fool two at once. I have an uncle who's kinda wealthy and with me at least, he's very honest about his side chick and he brags to me about his encounters with her while my aunt is away and such. It's more than anything a thirst for power and a sense of boredom that happens with the other partner. If the main partner lacks either in beauty or intelligence the man will go out of his way (now I'm speaking for me when I had side chicks) to look for more adventures and more thrills that with one girl it couldn't happen. Now I have a girlfriend whom I can't even cheat on when I masturbate (I began to feel guilty and images of her and I come) and meeting her was the best thing that could've happened because when I met her I knew she'd be the one so yes, the only cure for that side chick syndrome is if the man falls deeply in love with their significant other and if both parties do their absolute best in the relationship, otherwise it'll keep happening.

[MrOracle]

1. Men have a strong desire for variation, and though being in love tends to suppress that a good bit, it's always there. And some men are selfish and self-centered and will always take as much as they can get.

2. He probably feels powerful and desired.

3. He can get different things from different women. HIs wife may be a good mom/wife type, while his side chick may give him hot dirty sex that he loves but doesn't want or get from his wife.

[SanHoloz]

What if the wife is a highly desired woman who is a good wife/mom type that also enjoys hot dirty sex?
Would he just be the selfish guy then or?

[MrOracle]

@SanHoloz Probably, yes.

[SanHoloz]

I wonder what the thought process with them is. Even selfish men have a motivation, or some sorted of warped logic, even if they dont see their actions as wrong. It's delusional to me

[MrOracle]

@SanHoloz You're overthinking. The logic is "I want it, and I can get it, so I'm taking it." Nothing deeper than that. People like that feel that they deserve to get whatever they want, and if they can find a way to get it (no matter what it takes or who it hurts), then their belief has simply been confirmed and justified.

[SanHoloz]

Okay, yeah I am overthinking it. That makes sense.
I guess if you aren't that way it is hard to understand how someone could be and think that way.
Do they ever change? It seems like MAYBE some would but typically not.

[MrOracle]

@SanHoloz Yeah, for normal folks, it's hard to accept that people are that way, but it's true. And, sadly, most will never change.

[Anonymous]

Your friend is okay with being a side chick, so he technically "can" have her on the side. Therefore, he will take advantage of it. I feel bad for his wife, who probably doesn't even know and isn't okay with it. Even if she was okay with it, which is highly unlikely, they defeated the purpose of being married. I don't know, obviously the giy won't care but your friend should care about being a side chick. It's disrespectful to the wife and to your friend bc she doesn't value herself. If she really wants a man, there are plenty of other men out there who are single. It's technically nor your place, but the wife should know. It seems your friend doesn't have values in relationships so I doubt she'll back off for whatever reason (she doesn't care or have morals, loves his dick, etc.) or come clean to the wife, so I think someone who knows what's going on should tell her.

[jmcc17]

My guess... He saw advantages to getting married, to someone else over her, and because she doesn't mind that he's married, he can, as it were, have his cake and eat it.
If his wife knows, there's not really any sort of issue...

[Asker]

His wife doesn't know.. should I say something? I feel guilty knowing

[HappyWheels]

Well if you're going to tell his wife, you should probably bring along compelling evidence. Photos, conversations, videos, etc.

[chris1984]

i mean there would be multiple possible reasons for it. fear of being alone meaning he needs a backup relationship. not getting the kind of sex he wants from the main, yet not getting the emotional component from the side. likes them both. just horny as fuck.

[wysiwyg2525]

Stop with the drama and why do you care if your friend is seeing a married man. If your friend don't care why should you unless your jellious? Don't tell the wife anything. Why are you going to loose a friend and get involved in a married man's life. If they had kids why put them through it. Stop the drama queen syndrome and find a Boyfriend and create your life. Stop living in someone else's life.

[AustinTXGuy]

Don't over think it. It's simple arithmetic...2 > 1. Add in the dash of thrill of being bad and having a side chick and that's all the answer you need. The sex must be phenomenal for her to be OK with it... or she is secretly in love with him and thinks she'll steal him away eventually... craziness. If he respected her enough to be with her, then he would have.

[LexMan]

Bc that guy is a douche. But when dating it’s really helpful to have a side chick otherwise I feel like I’d be expecting a lot of time and energy from just one person. I’d gon100% with someone if I knew she’d reciprocate, but.. I also hate to appear needy and attached, and so do most girls when i start to show it. If he’s married and still pullin that shit I’d say it was never real love in the first place, at least on his part

[Anpu23]

When I was at my worst. I was married, had a kept mistress, and still picked women up in bars. It was more about the variety then about the sex. It was pure ego and the chase.

[outsidecurve]

Maybe ask your friend why she likes being a home wrecker?

He's a scumbag for sure but it takes two to tango.

[Annoymous08]

They are called side chicks for a reason... Just like how there are starters and benches in sports. They are there until the starters get injured and need to be subbed in.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

He thinks the grass is greener on the other side and or
he could just be using your friend just for sex cause he
knows that she will put out.

[Regular1]

If you have your side chick as the main chick, you'll need to make your main chick your side chick. That sounds like an awful lot of trouble for no real reason.

[sean1234]

There is no such thing as a side chick, although there is such thing as being insane.

[Canadaman99]

Why do men cheat? Why do women cheat? Why does anyone cheat

[Ell803]

Because every girl has a dude on the side but they won’t admit it.

[FýrdracaDócincel]

I don't get this. Instead of "side chick" just say cheating.

[Roskin523]

Women value emotional monogamy and men value sexual monogamy in thier partners. Its just biology

[adamshunglol]

i feel like this is a dumb question. why have 2 super awesome things when you can just have 1...

[Leonard58]

Men egos makes them do dumb things. He would be considered a player playing games with ladies lives. This is very disrespectful to women Period.

[saladman]

I thinks it's real dumb and it makes no sense to me

[BonniePipers]

Maybe it's too much pressure.

[El_Samir]

Attention is the reason anyone cheats I reckon.

[gobsmacked3]

because some women allow them to

[countryboy94]

Because they are too scared to be alone

[DavidH11]

He is ghetto and he is cheating then

[PenguinMan_]

why have 1 when you can have 2?

[fredrick_27]

Because she is not the main chick

[Omega_brie]

Because we like sex